


Seasons of the Light- Season 12

by Kirabaros



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-16
Updated: 2020-01-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:21:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 60,874
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22275532
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kirabaros/pseuds/Kirabaros
Summary: Amara and God have reconciled and have taken off. Things seem pretty normal until the British Men of Letters come along. Mary is alive and it looks like Lucifer is up to something. One shot tags to season 12. Set in the Chronicles of Absolution verse.
Relationships: Sam Winchester/Angela (OFC), Sam Winchester/Original Female Character(s)





	1. 12.01 Carry on Little Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Angie are being held by the Men of Letters. Sam is being tortured and Angie is unable to do anything. Things look dire but Angie is all about keeping hope and believing there is a way. Tag to the season 12 premier Keep Calm and Carry On

_I need you to patch him up and to check on her. She has a little package._

She wanted to open her eyes the moment she heard that annoying British accent but she couldn’t. She had been trying to wake up since something flew and hit her on the neck. She had reacted to the shot because… because that bitch shot Sam.

Angela tolerated little when it came to her family being hurt or used as leverage. It was one of the reasons she had protested against her and Sam starting a relationship. But he wanted to and was persistent, the quality she loved best about him. So when that little bitch Antonia shot him, she was not a happy camper and was prepared to unleash hell on her. She didn’t get the chance though and she was down.

She cursed herself because she was still exhausted from helping Amara and Chuck earlier. She was weak but she could sense the baby was okay. Just as was promised. It still made her upset because she couldn’t do anything to help Sam and they not only wanted Sam but they wanted her too. She shouldn’t have been surprised since she had worked with the Men of Letters and still thought they were a bunch of pretentious assholes.

She felt the hands on her and she heard Sam protesting through his gag yet she couldn’t open her eyes. It was like she was in a state of limbo or something like that. She couldn’t move her limbs at all even though she wanted to comfort her mate. She could hear and feel what was being done to her. All she could do was listen and try to fight whatever it was in her system.

_What is wrong with me? Why can’t I wake up?_

“You know Cat, after everything you’ve been through you still have to ask?”

Angela heard it but knew he wasn’t there. Gabriel was still on lockdown since he was still relearning how to use his powers, like a teenager undergoing puberty. All because of the spell Nathir, the Celtic god of wisdom, gave her as a reward for retrieving him out of Purgatory. And this voice was the older version, how she remembered him.

Focusing, she managed to ‘open’ her eyes and she found herself back in the Men of Letters bunker. It was empty and looking down, she found herself not pregnant. She realized she was inside her mind in one of those places she created as a retreat when she practiced focus and other things that she had learned under Sigrid. She turned and saw Gabriel standing there as she remembered before Lucifer killed him. She gestured at him, “Remembered?”

“Sort of,” Gabriel replied with a smirk. “I gotta hand it to ya, Cat. The whole working up your spirit thing… you sure know how to get in touch with the mind.”

“That was Morpheus,” Angela corrected as she looked around. She looked up when she heard a voice.

_We could just kill her. After all the old men consider her expendable._

_No. They want to know what she knows. She has been cooperative in the past._

“You cooperate?” Gabriel chuckled at that. He put his hands on his hips. “What did you get yourself into?”

“Be glad that you weren’t blasted off like Cas,” Angela replied as she gasped. She had felt her body being lowered and bumped. “Okay.”

“You can feel and hear what is going on but you can’t do anything about it.” Gabriel watched her as she looked around taking deep breaths. “Just like when you went…”

“To the Land of the Dead. I know,” she finished. She closed her eyes as she remembered everything that happened before Sam got shot. She recalled seeing the woman and… “She injected me with something that rendered me unconscious but I was put under before and didn’t do this.” She looked around with a frown.

“Maybe it’s your subconscious or instinct, Cat,” Gabriel replied with a shrug. “All I know is that I needed to get in touch with you when I heard the noise upstairs and the puppies whining. This was the best way since we still don’t have what we once had.”

Angela acknowledged that as she looked around. She instinctively put her hand to her flat abdomen, feeling a little lost since she couldn’t feel the familiar roundness nor the gentle movements of the life she was carrying. She turned her gaze to the library tables where they had spent more time doing research and general hanging out.

“So… who’s the bitch I heard?”

Angela looked at Gabriel and was about to speak when she felt a sudden chill down her spine and it felt… wet? She gasped at the chill since she didn’t expect it but it wasn’t her chill. She felt it but she wasn’t getting the treatment. She looked at Gabriel and then closed her eyes, letting her powers work though. _Sam?_

_Angie?_

Angela gave a slight smile as she heard Sam’s voice. Well it was his mind speaking to her but still it was better than nothing. And it wasn’t like they didn’t occasionally did that to tease Dean.

_Are you okay? The baby?_

_The baby is fine Sam. They promised._ Angela knew he was worried. He must have been worried when she didn’t wake up at all. More likely he put up a fight if he saw someone touch her and her stomach. _I’m okay. I just can’t move._

_What do you mean?_

_Whatever they injected me with… I can hear and feel what’s going on but I can’t move. Like a coma maybe._

_Like when you rescued me._

Angela paused at that. Of course he would remember that. He would remember seeing her engage in a spiritual war with Dean by her side not just because the spirits of the tribe had been enslaved but because he had been taken. _Yes. I guess. Sam… what are they doing?_

_They want information and I told them to go screw themselves. I got a cold shower._

That was the reason for the chill. She could feel what Sam was feeling; all part and parcel of their bond. She had gotten good at blocking most things out and the same for him since daily emotions were like white noise and with her being pregnant… Besides it was only in extreme distress that they would use it or like her where her inhibitions were down. _Well I can attest to Chinese water torture being effective._

 _We were tortured in hell._ You _were a torturer of demons. You’d laugh at this._

Maybe she would since she had been tortured herself by demons and rogue hunters/slayers but it wasn’t a laughing matter. She knew what extreme interrogation entailed. _Maybe but… don’t treat this lightly, Sam. I know the Men of Letters and while here they are okay. The British… you want to know why I am such a bitch with the Centurion?_

_I get it but… they still are a joke._

Angela sighed at that. She knew that Sam was only reacting to the situation and he was pissed. She knew that it was combination that he really didn’t know what happened to Dean and because she was in the state she was in. He was in alpha mode and being defiant was his way of getting through it.

_I’m going to get us out of here. One way or another._

Angela believed that he could. It was a matter of whether or not he would be able to. _I believe you._

It seemed to be what he needed to hear. She could sense his defiance. She opened her eyes to find Gabriel looking at her, waiting for an explanation. It was then she felt a burning sensation and she cried out and fell to her knees. She cried out in pain and pressed the underside of her wrists to her forehead and cried out, “Sam!”

~0~0~0~0~

Sam grimaced from the pain from the burns. Maybe he was being stupid about this but really? He didn’t know if Dean was dead or alive and these assholes had his wife locked up somewhere and he had no idea what they were doing to her. All he knew was that she was virtually vulnerable and unable to defend herself and their baby physically and that had him pissed.

After being soaked in a cold shower, he had his foot burned by a blowtorch. The pain was intense and he couldn’t help but cry out. He ended up passing out from it but he didn’t give that bitch of a torturer the satisfaction of any answers. It was the same answer: he told them to screw themselves. They thought he was the problem? Please.

He opened his eyes to find himself sitting in chair in the Men of Letters bunker. He frowned until he saw Angela on the floor breathing heavily. He saw Gabriel kneeling next to her and encouraging her to breathe. He was out of his chair and by her side, “Angie. Gabe, what happened?”

“Short answer: You. Long answer: You,” Gabriel offered as he let Sam take over stroking her back. “Did you forget that you two can feedback each other?”

Sam sat back on his heels, aware that he wasn’t feeling pain in his leg or his foot and looking at his wife, she didn’t look pregnant. Now he knew that he was inside her head or something. He glared at the archangel that looked as how he remembered from when they first met even though he looked different now. He directed his attention to Angela and helping her sit up. “What happened?”

“Nothing to me,” Angela replied as she looked at Sam. “But to you. I… felt the cold shower and… the burns.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. Not your fault. Nobody’s fault. It’s what it is.” Angela adjusted herself to be sitting on the floor. “I guess I pulled you here when you passed out. It’s a place I go to when I practice focus.”

Sam looked around. He understood enough from dream walking to get a grasp on it even if it was a little distance. “I’m sorry Angie,” he apologized. “They want information on other hunters and…”

“Don’t believe their bullshit. They collar and execute without asking. It’s why I stopped my associations with them. And I may have called them a bunch of pretentious assholes that know nothing about the world we work in.” Angela gave a slight shrug and a sigh. She looked around. “And probably why they want me. They won’t interrogate me since they do know that I have a few standing friendships.”

“Not to mention a goddess that would be pissed,” Gabriel muttered as he looked around at nothing.

“The point it that they won’t hurt me but they will hurt you.”

“And it hurts you in the process,” Sam countered. “I can’t…”

“Sam,” Angela stopped Sam by putting her fingertips on his lips. “You can. The easy part is over.” She looked at him intently.

“Easy?”

“I know extreme interrogation. Perfected it,” she replied firmly. “Physical is easy to deal with. And you and I both know how that works. It’s the mental that’s the hard part. They are going to fuck with your mind.” She was past being nice with her language. “There are ways to do that but the most effective is being drugged but you have something that they won’t anticipate.”

Sam bent to hear more but his body woke up and he found that he was back where he had been kept. He was on the floor and he felt the pain in his leg and foot. He also felt a throb in his neck and put his hand up to feel the puncture wound. He realized it was exactly how Angela said it would happen. He knew she was right but he had been in a state of panic. He always hated that he ever hurt her directly or indirectly but she never blamed him. She picked up and carried on.

He eased himself into the chair and looked at his injuries. His foot was bandaged but it still hurt. His leg had been patched up and it still hurt. It meant that he was still alive. But the unknown with whatever he had been injected with… He didn’t know what to anticipate.

_I’m with you Sam._

He stiffened slightly as he heard her voice. He closed his eyes and could imagine her hands touching his face, running her fingers through his hair. He wasn’t a kid anymore but those almost motherly gestures were more of a comfort to him. _I’m here, Angie_ , he replied as he looked around. He had to find a way out.

The hallucinations started a few moments later. The loud ringing and then the memories… It was like reliving in high definition. He saw what he had done to Dean when Lucifer was wearing him to the prom. He saw his fist hitting her. He saw Jessica when she died. Then the voices started coming. It was too much like when Lucifer tormented him.

_Sam, focus. Listen to my voice. There is only me._

It was enough to get him to come up with a plan. It was hard to carry out since he still heard the voices but he focused on hers. She was talking to him, repeating the same thing.

_There is only me. Focus on your goal._

It would have worked but it didn’t and Sam felt defeat when he couldn’t get out of the basement where he was being kept. He slumped on the stairs and was there into the night rubbing his head against the railing slightly. They were in a fix. He doubted there was anyone to come and rescue them unless Gabriel tried something but to the supernatural, he was dead. That he was back would have a bunch of questions and maybe nothing good coming from it. That and he wouldn’t know what to do to get his wife out if she wasn’t awake.

_It’ll be okay, Sam._

Sam sniffed at that as he contracted his body. He was cold and ached all over. _I don’t know Angie. No one is coming._

_You don’t really believe that do you?_

Sam sniffed again as he leaned against the railing. He could sleep but he wasn’t comfortable. And he might be torturing himself to get some relief that his wife was okay even if in a comatose state only to be taken away when he woke up and faced it all over again.

_Sam, it will be okay._

_How? I’m in here and you’re… wherever and not able to protect yourself or the baby._

_The baby will be fine. That is a promise._

Sam made a slight face but kept his head down. No need to let whoever was watching to see that he looked like he had cracked when in fact he was only talking to his wife. It was one thing he had over them. They didn’t know about them unless they had some idea and they weren’t sure about the whole of it. It was a lingering thought that crossed his mind as he sat there. It was hopeless.

“Nothing is hopeless, Sam.”

Sam didn’t look. It had to be the drugs in his system kicking in again. Then he felt a hand touch his face. This had to be a trick. He refused to look up.

“It’s not a trick. Just a little different.”

Sam finally shifted a little to have a good look. The hand was still there. It was then he saw her. His wife was there and she looked as he had last seen her before this. He was tempted to reach out and touch her but refrained. He stared at her with a pained expression.

“I’m not here really and you are not hallucinating.” Angela looked at Sam as she smiled gently and touched his face, caressing it gently. “This is one of the ways spiritual warriors fight. They can manifest their spirits to fight other spirits that can’t be seen when they get to vengeful spirit mode. They can only be seen by those they want to see.”

Sam felt his lip twitch and gave a half smile. He remained silent since he wasn’t sure if the woman Antonia could see what he was seeing or not. Better he not give any indication he could but he did shift his eyes in the direction of the camera he had noticed.

It didn’t seem to matter since Angela just accepted it and explained. “If she sees me, then she would come barging in or do something to my body to wake me up. But to make things easier, I will just stay here with you.”

As if to do what she said, she walked over and sat next to Sam. She leaned over him and started caressing his head being careful not to create too much of a disturbance. Sam just accepted it. He knew that she was real. He was not going to try and question it but… it was a comfort. He knew that it was not going to be simple to get out of there. Not with his injuries and her condition. And there was the nagging thought that no one was going to come.

Sam lowered his gaze and shut his eyes the moment he started hearing her sing. He recognized the song. It was one she had made up one day when she was spacing out after their return trip to the cage. It spoke of all the things that mattered in life and that darkness was not evil but a shade that clouded the way. When it was lifted, the light came again.

He remembered thinking it odd since she had been scared at the time because Amara knew her from a long time ago and it was a life she didn’t remember or wasn’t sure of at the time. He remembered thinking that it sounded sympathetic to Amara even though she had been sucking souls of people. She never could explain why she thought it that way but she would sing it every now and then for no particular reason except that it felt right.

Sitting there in the dark, Sam was certain that he knew why. It was a song that could be taken literally but meant so much more. It was a part of who the woman he loved was and one of many things he loved about her. Sitting there in the dark, it gave him some courage to keep going. He had to stay strong if he was going to figure out how to help his family. He muttered his thanks in Enochian, grateful that he had her teach him a few words.

She merely brushed his locks and hummed the tune before starting the song again. Sam hummed a bit and figured that it wouldn’t hurt. It wasn’t like they were going to think anything except that he was trying to keep his sanity. He would do as the song said and keep what it was talking about. He would carry on the little light, the light of hope, and think of something.


	2. 12.02 Mother's Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam has been rescued from the Men of Letters and Mary takes time to reflect on that and seeing her old friend. A tag to Momma Mia.

_She’ll won’t wake up for a couple of hours. It’s best to let her sleep._

Mary thought about that as she looked down at the woman who had been her best friend and protector. It was like being twenty again hearing that and she couldn’t help but smile fondly at her sleeping friend. It was like old times.

“You never change do you,” Mary whispered fondly as she brushed a few errant hairs away and looked around the room.

Like everything else, it was a shock to find that her best friend was still alive and she had taken it upon herself to look after her boys. It was more of a shock to find that her youngest not only fell in love with her but she fell in love with him and they were married and now expecting. That was the mother load of surprises in Mary’s view and yet she was rather happy for that surprise. It all made sense.

When she and Dean went to rescue Sam and Angela, she panicked slightly at the fact that her friend wasn’t in the same room as Sam and Dean when she barged in and told that skank to leave her boys alone. She feared that the worst had come to pass and it panged her heart that she wouldn’t be able to see her friend once again. She had been thrilled when Dean told her that she was alive and living with them. She got the surprise of her life when in the middle of the fight that bitch had the gun pointed at her.

It was like watching a ghost appear but it was not quite that. Her friend appeared in a puff of grey and black smoke and she looked ready to tear bodies apart. Mary had only seen her that angry once or twice and that was when she almost got killed on a hunt or when she was hunting with her father and her father was almost killed. Yet this was different and Mary was wide eyed when her friend gripped that Men of Letter’s bitch and stared at her hard saying, “You think you can get away with this?”

Mary had seen nothing like it as her friend actually moved from person to smoke and back again as she fought that bitch. It allowed her to get to her feet to be ready to fight. It was almost like a clichéd film when her friend appeared beside her and held a fighting pose before disappearing as she herself continued the fight.

She didn’t expect that move where she was choking by that technique and thought she was going to die. By then Dean had gotten himself free and her friend appeared and she was ready to kill. At the same time, they both moved forward and Angela seemed to disappear into the woman’s body. Dean had knocked her out but the body was twitching like she was possessed until her friend reappeared and stood in front of the three of them when that other Men of Letters guy came in with Castiel. Her friend was ready to fight and even said so saying, “Enough. Let us leave or suffer the consequences.”

At that moment Mary blinked when she thought she saw the faint outline of wings appear as the lights flickered. She looked to Sam and Dean and found them tense but it was like this was normal for them. Castiel showed no emotion but a bland acceptance. It had her wondering what the hell had been going on the thirty years she had been dead. The Angela she knew had never shown this ability before and if she did use her powers, it was the equivalent of child’s play but equally powerful. Most of the time she preferred using her fists.

It was also a big surprise when Sam called out to her and said something in a language she wasn’t familiar with. That seemed to have the effect that he wanted and the lights stopped flickering and the wings disappeared. All that was there was the smoky appearance of her friend as the guy explained that he wasn’t there to harm them and give his card to Castiel. He also said that he was going to take the bitch back and she would be dealt with.

It was typical to hear her friend say, “She better or what I did will be a picnic in comparison to what I will do.”

The guy seemed to take it seriously and let them go but not without a rejoinder that her calls were missed. It had Mary curious about it but at the moment the situation called to getting Sam and her friend out. It warmed her heart when Dean gave a brief but brotherly hug to Sam after untying him and it shocked her when Sam headed for the stairs with a single purpose in mind. By then her friend had disappeared completely.

They found Angela lying on a cot and she hadn’t been harmed. Shackled with warded bindings sure but she was unharmed and it looked like she was asleep. Mary watched as Sam approached her and with the tenderest of care, picked up Angela and walked out with her despite his injuries. Dean merely asked if he needed to make a call once they got back to the bunker and Sam made a noncommittal sound but Dean understood it as Sam put her in the backseat of the Impala and climbed in with her.

Mary may have told Dean that she was a mom and that he had to listen to her but this time she said nothing as Sam took charge with Angela once they got back to the bunker. He was in pain from his injuries but he was too focused on her friend to pay it attention. It was only after he made the assessment that she was going to be asleep for a couple of hours that he allowed Dean to take him aside and check on his injuries. It left Mary alone with Angela and she took a seat next to her, content to wait it out if she had to.

Looking at Angela sleeping, Mary got a good look at her friend. Even though she was still her friend, she noticed the physical changes like the muscle tone, the long hair with highlights. Mary had never known her friend to do anything to her hair except the required brushing and that was like a cardinal rule. She had missed a lot.

Sitting there, Mary took in other things. The most noticeable was the baby bump. She had to admit she never expected that from Angela. That coupled with the fact that it was Sam’s meaning that she was going to be a grandmother… It was a lot but Mary was happy to see her friend. The last thought she had when she was on that ceiling aside from wondering if John and the boys were safe was that her friend was far away even though she wanted her there.

A slight moan caught Mary’s attention and she looked down. She watched with her breath held as Angela wrinkled her brow. It was completely unexpected when her eyes opened and the golden orbs that always held fascination for her were revealed and they roved throughout the room while her nose twitched until they landed on Mary and full on stared with neither surprise nor shock. To Mary, it was a look she hated and liked at the same time.

“Mary?”

Mary looked at Angela and nodded silently. She waited while the golden orbs studied her intently and she watched as her nose moved, sniffing the air. It had Mary puzzled since she had never seen her friend do that before either. She definitely needed to know more about what her friend had been doing.

“So I wasn’t imagining things when I sensed Sam, Dean and you in trouble.”

It had been uttered so matter of fact that Mary couldn’t help but reply, “The only imagination you have is not getting the scolding you deserve for worrying everybody like you did.”

Angela’s lip curled slightly at that, “You are Mary. Only Mary would try to be mom to me and she was and still is a squirt of a brat.” She looked at Mary and the curl turned into a slight smile. “I missed you.”

“You’re not surprised that I’m alive?” Mary had to ask the question.

Angela shifted but still remained on her side where she had been. “No.” She looked at Mary slowly. “I’ve seen people come back under all sorts of circumstances. Not a surprise. Are you alright? Did that bitch do anything I couldn’t see?”

Mary smiled slightly and shook her head, “Still worrying about others before yourself?” She hummed at the grin she was getting. “I’m fine. Though you did surprise me with that smoke thing you did. I don’t remember you doing that.”

“Because I didn’t teach you that.” Angela looked at nothing in particular before moving her eyes back towards Mary. “It was a technique I hadn’t used in decades until maybe about four or five years ago. It was all I could do since I was drugged and I couldn’t move but I could hear and feel what was happening to me. It’s a perk and maybe a curse of being a spirit warrior.”

Mary blinked at that. “Isn’t that a story?” At the look she got from Angela she sat back, “Of course not. You were one for keeping secrets especially if it could do that. You were scary enough just standing there.”

“I never did that before but I was… I was very angry…”

“I know,” Mary replied as she reached out and cupped Angela’s cheek. She noticed her eyes widened slightly but didn’t move when she did. “Sorry. Couldn’t help it. You look like you needed it.”

Angela stared at Mary as she replied, “No, it’s alright. I just… I don’t remember you doing that.”

“Mom thing,” Mary offered tentatively. She frowned when Angela’s gaze turned away. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, just… not sure how you feel about…” Angela glanced down at her abdomen as her hand came to touch the swell protectively. She turned her head down so her nose was touching the pillow.

Mary watched as Angela went into protective mode but was also seeking comfort. She could see how it would look from Angela’s view and no doubt that old psyche she remembered was rearing its head. “I was surprised yes once I calmed down after the whole thing at the farm but I’ve had time to think about it and… I’m actually happy.”

“Hmm?”

Mary wanted to laugh at the dubious expression she was getting. “I’m not mad. I’m happy. Granted it’s going to take some getting used to. I mean… thirty years is a long time.”

Angela looked at Mary and studied her. Mary wanted to squirm since she recognized it as the look that searched for lies and that had been very frequent when she first met her. Finally Angela said, “It wasn’t easy. I… didn’t take it well and got out sort of. Kept an eye on John and the boys on.”

“You didn’t have to.”

“Yeah, I did.” Angela shifted and tried to sit up but was held back by Mary. She made do positioning her body so she could look at Mary full on. “You meant a lot to me Mary and I… never forgave myself for what happened with Yellow Eyes; that I couldn’t stop you from making the deal and that I even put his sights on you in the first place. He was after me, Mary and I shouldn’t have let you gotten close.”

“But you did and you know what? It was the best thing in my life,” Mary countered firmly. “You told me to chase what would make me happy and that was with John. The only thing that I ever regretted was letting you leave.”

“Thought it was for the best and it worked for about four or five years.”

“Don’t forget Dean’s flu or Sam’s pertussis.”

Angela made a slight face and looked at nothing in particular until her gaze reverted back to Mary. “And they’re still lousy when they are sick.”

Mary couldn’t help but chuckle at that. Angela always had a way of filling in details in a way that was funny and it relieved the seriousness of the load at times. “Really?”

“Though Dean gets a little funny and thinks he’s in Alice’s Wonderland. Sam… like a bear in a cave under a blanket. You have no idea how hard it is to get them to take cold medicine.” Angela grinned while trying to prevent the yawn coming through.

“Please tell me you used the stuff you make.” Mary couldn’t help but laugh a little at that.

“I do. Works like a charm every time.”

Mary smiled and leaned forward to hug Angela as best as she could. She was so glad this didn’t change. She breathed in her friend’s scent. She felt Angela return it awkwardly since she was still lying on her side but that said enough. She pulled back and looked at her. “Thank you for looking after them and… I’m glad you’re happy. It’s a first and… I like it.”

“I am happy,” Angela replied. “Happier than I can last remember and that was… when I was a child.” She looked at Mary and gave a slight smile. “I just… hope this isn’t some dream.”

“You dream?” Mary smiled gently since she figured her friend was going through emotional turmoil and it was increased by her pregnancy. “It’s like you once said, good things do come along and you only have to be the one to grab it and hang on to keep it.”

“Using my own words. You’re definitely Mary.” Angela chuckled as she stretched slightly. It was then she grimaced and started to move to get up.

Mary put a hand to her friend’s shoulder, “What are you doing?”

“Getting up.”

“I don’t think Sam would like that.”

“No, he’s relieved. And I’m hungry.”

Mary studied how Angela responded. There was a lot to catch up on since her friend seemed to know exactly how Sam was feeling and seemed so calm about it. Still she had just been rescued and she could see the tiredness in her friend’s eyes. “Then I’ll get you something to eat.”

“You don’t cook.”

“No but I know what you like.” Mary stood up and gave the look at Angela. “So stay put until I get food.”

“You’re not the boss of me.”

“No but I can probably convince Sam and Dean to do otherwise.”

It seemed like a tense moment as Mary stared down at Angela, both having narrowed expressions. It looked like a standoff and if they had both been younger, it would have ended up in a wrestling match. As it were… “Alright,” Angela agreed.

“What?”

“You heard me.”

Mary eyed her friend suspiciously. This was like the whole argument over that shifter they took out. “What are you trying to pull?”

“Nothing. Just agreeing.” Angela gave a smirk at Mary to let her know that she knew exactly what she had been thinking of. “And… you’re right about Sam.”

“And he was certainly wrong about you. He said a couple of hours.”

“He was ballparking it.” Angela gave a slight shrug. “It’s been like that in the mornings. Some days I don’t want to move but just sleep or I sleep but super tired. And others… ready to go.”

Mary couldn’t help but smile at that. She put a hand on her friend’s shoulder and replied, “It’s called being pregnant. Though I think you have a tendency to break the rules than follow them.” She chuckled when Angela made a slight sound at that. “Please just sleep for a couple of hours. I’ll wake you when I have food.”

Angela sighed at that. “Fine.” She waved a hand before putting it on her abdomen.

Mary smiled knowing she won this battle. It had her wondering how the hell her boys managed to do the same if they succeeded at all. She tucked her friend in despite her protests and made sure she was comfortable before going to get food. She had a mind to use that Camaro she had seen parked next to the Impala. She looked like a beauty. She was at the door when she heard, “Keys to my baby are on the hook by the garage door.”

Mary turned and looked at her friend before turning off the light. She took the advice and went to get food. She kept in mind her friend and made her choices. She wasn’t surprised to find her friend already up when she returned and putting something together. It did give her a chance to observe how she interacted with Sam and she got a pretty good view but was a bit concerned at how reserved it seemed.

The mood seemed to lighten up when Dean asked about her meatloaf. Angela just snorted at that and laughed afterwards. It was even funnier when she leaned over Dean’s shoulder and teased him saying, “You still got my chicken casserole.”

It was even more surprising when Angela actually rapped Dean’s knuckles for his table manners and Dean got embarrassed. She knew that her friend was firm and she only needed to say it once and it became law. Here it was like… it was like a family. Mary saw that time for her friend hadn’t been too bad and her boys had a fairly good life with her despite everything. Her friend was still the same in that she kept a pleasant look for everyone’s sake in spite of how she was feeling. Mary felt content that her friend was that constant despite her personal changes and it helped.

Mary knew that things were going to be trial and error since she had to get used to her boys now being grown men and her friend was married to one of them. She had been shocked at the whole thing but it was a sort of comfort to see her boys and friend interact with each other. She was even lucky enough to see her friend examine Sam’s cuts to his face with that focused and yet tender look. She hadn’t even spoken to Sam yet, preferring to give him time and she wasn’t sure about talking to him. So it was a surprise when he came in with a cup of tea. She recognized the blend immediately and felt a heartwarming thanks towards her friend.

True she could be upset at the way things ended up but she wasn’t. It wasn’t like her friend deliberately did what she did and it ended the way it did. No doubt she resisted and hard. It only proved to Mary what she had known and that her friend was a loving and caring person. A bit unconventional and brash and sometimes downright insulting and in creative ways but she was a good person. As she hugged Sam, Mary sensed that things would be okay. Rocky maybe but okay and she was okay with that.


	3. 12.03 Light's Foundation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mary comes to the decision to leave the bunker and Angela supports her decision. She also comes to the realization of her own condition and accepts that changes must be made. Tag to The Foundry.

“I can’t be here.”

Angela watched as Mary hugged Sam and said her goodbyes. She didn’t want to intrude and she knew that it was going to be hard on everyone. Even she didn’t want Mary to leave them but she understood the reasons why. It was just one of those things that sucked even though it was the right thing to do.

It was a family hunting trip as Dean called it to St. Paul, Minnesota. It was a case of adults being lured by a baby’s cry to their deaths. It was a case that interested her and she was willing to go along with it for Mary’s sake. She knew that it was a means of coping and it really threw Sam and Dean for a loop since she calmly agreed that it was worth looking into.

It certainly had been fun watching Dean’s face from the back seat when Mary told him that she could make better homemade jerky. She hadn’t mentioned it previously and enjoyed the fact that Mary teased her eldest son that she went through the same thing only she got the jerky within a month of knowing her. It certainly brought a laugh but it also showed Angela what Mary was going through.

It was a hunch that Mary had and Angela supported and went with her even though it was probably not a good idea for her to be doing any hunting in the first place. Sam had been a bit more overprotective lately since the kidnapping and subsequent spirit warrior thing zapped her energy to the point that she slept in but it didn’t stop Sam from bringing her breakfast in bed. Mary was more subdued and would have tea with her.

As it turned out, the man who lost his daughter had kept the children he killed bound to him. He possessed Mary and he almost hurt her because she was pregnant; she had a child. They did manage to burn the remains and free the children but that didn’t help the feelings that Mary was feeling and Angela sensed it. And it was why she knew it was inevitable.

She made it a rule to not use her empath abilities especially on her family. She only broke it because it was necessary like when she calmed Sam down at that resort and to soothe children that were scared. This time she used it to sense Mary’s feelings about trying to fit in. It helped when she stood by Mary’s decision to leave them to find her way.

She stood in the entry hall as Mary said her goodbyes while trying to deal with the fact that the baby decided to do a tap dance on her kidneys at that moment. She tried to hide it since that would really have Sam start to hover around. She didn’t blame him but at the moment it wasn’t about her; it was about her best friend trying to live in a world that was vastly different from the one she had left. She also felt a little angry at Amara.

She was certain that Chuck’s sister meant well but… Mary was happy in her place in heaven. She had what she knew taken from her and thrust into this. She knew how that felt all too well. She never told Sam or Dean about when she first died and that the memories she stayed in were the ones that had both her parents together at the villa in Tuscany. When she was brought back… She understood and see a little but it wasn’t the same. And she knew that Mary wasn’t really leaving her or the boys.

When Mary, headed towards the door, Angela looked up and said, “Mary.”

Mary paused and looked at Angela. “Angie…”

Angela cut off Mary by cupping her cheek. It was nothing unusual since she had done that before when Mary was younger. She looked at her friend with a gentle smile as she took in the shortened hair that she had helped her with and her appearance. Finally, she said, “This is like the last time.”

Mary was struck with familiarity and she felt comfortable. It made her want to stay instead of leave because it was so familiar. She had stayed as long as she had because Angela was her one constant while trying to adjust. She sighed in relief as she relaxed in Angela’s touch as she was very familiar with what her friend was doing.

Angela watched as Mary relaxed and smiled, “There are many paths before us even before we take the first step. Some we can take with others and others… the choice is ours alone.” She slowly reached up with her other hand and caressed Mary’s head after running her fingers through her hair. “The choice is yours and it is what you feel is right. In the end, we must be sure of ourselves. Do what you think and feel is right.”

“You haven’t changed,” Mary whispered as tears started leaking out.

Angela smiled as she held Mary’s head and brought her forehead to hers and touch it gently. “I told you to do what makes you happy and you found John and did what you wanted. I am telling you the same now.” She took a breath in to commit Mary’s scent. “It hasn’t been fair to you being here.” She then whispered, “I know what it is like to have something as wonderful as what you had in heaven taken away.”

“Angie,” Mary breathed, “I don’t want to leave you or my boys.”

“I know.” Angela closed her eyes and rubbed her head slightly on Mary’s and felt Mary do the same. “But if this is to be, you need to be sure of yourself. Isn’t that why you came to me when you met John?”

Mary knew that. It was why she felt grounded just standing there with her head being held affectionately by her best friend. She could recall how crazy it made her dad because it put her in position to break her neck. Her dad never liked Angela because she was half vampire. “You always were honest with me even if it hurt you.”

Angela pulled back to look Mary in the eye but still held her head. “And it has always been a reward to see people live their lives as they want.” She smiled before pressing a kiss to Mary’s forehead. “It’s all I will ever want for you.”

Mary took a breath since she was about to cry as she stepped back. She felt Angela’s hands slip from her face and reached out to hold them in her hands. “Don’t ever change.”

Angela smiled as she clasped her right over Mary’s right. She continued to smile as her hand lit up as she had done for Charlie. When she was done, she said, “I’ll always be with you Mary. I won’t leave you again.”

When she pulled her hands away, Mary looked down and saw a small tattoo on the top of her right hand between her first finger and thumb. She blinked and then looked up at Angela. Her mouth opened trying to find the words to say.

“I won’t leave you,” Angela repeated with a smile. She looked down at Mary’s hand and then back at her. She said no more as she watched Mary climb the stairs to the entrance to the bunker. She watched as Mary left with a loud clang but she didn’t flinch. She merely stared at the entrance until Mary had gone.

It was quiet for a time as Angela continued to stare at the door. She didn’t even feel it when her lower back ached and the baby gave a well-placed kick. She merely stared as if deep in thought but it was more like she was watching Mary from afar as she had done the first few week after she severed ties with her. She would watch as Mary was happy when she dated John and was there when she married him though she never knew it. She had made a promise to stay away and she did after that but it wasn’t always so.

She couldn’t completely stay away but she stayed away enough to provide that cushion Mary wanted. Later she found out that Mary never wanted her to leave. At the time though… Angela understood what Mary felt like. She remembered when she saw Dean running like a happy child after she got him through that bad bout of pneumonia; it probably would have killed him. Those were her fondest memories of Dean when he was a child and deep down, it was why she treated him as such when she teased him. Sam was a different story.

Mary had called her when Sam was sick and on the verge of dying. She came because it was Mary though she could admit that she rather liked the little bundle of joy Sam was. Still her fondest memories were seeing Mary happy. So yeah, she knew the feeling well. It wasn’t exactly the same but she knew it and could relate. It was why she could let Mary go like she did and knew that it wasn’t because she didn’t want to be with them. It was because she loved them that she had to go.

“The head knows what the heart forgets but sometimes it just needs time to click,” Angela murmured as she stared up at the door. She rested her hand on her abdomen and took a moment to really think about things.

Change was always the hardest thing to accept. Luckily for her, she had years in the bank was able to move with the times but there were some things that took time to accept. One was the fact that she was no longer the lone wolf warrior she had been. True she had partners but she treated them like ships passing through the night kind of thing. Then came the Winchesters and she just couldn’t leave them and she found she didn’t want to. She stayed and fell in love and they got married. She gave a slightly wry smile at how that happened.

Being in a relationship with Sam, it was a big change and that came with its bumps in the road but she still went on the hunt. They were a team and they backed each other up. She never saw a difference. Even with the painful revelations they stood by each other and carried on. Then came the news that she was pregnant and even then it didn’t quite click completely. She carried on even through the bouts of morning sickness, the strange cravings and desires and never sat back and let it sink in. She didn’t even let it sink in the time when Balthazar changed the timeline and she found out then and when it was switched back…

Change was never easy to accept or acknowledge and Angela knew she was guilty of that. She never claimed to be an authority or expert on anything. To her that was hubris. Here it was willful ignorance. Part of it was because that she didn’t want to be seen as weak; she never accepted fully that it was okay to show a little vulnerability, at least not until Sam said that it was okay and told her she didn’t have to be afraid with him. Another part was that hunting was all she knew. She had given up being normal or as close to normal in terms of being domesticated a long time ago even though she had tried to do it after Mary died. It took near stupidity on John’s part to drag her bag in and she took over making sure the damn fool didn’t get himself killed.

She had always been called a warrior, a killer, a hunter… all those things that were associated with violence and death. Even when she healed someone it was always the warrior princess or by any other name she was known as. She had never been called a mother though that started to change when Hibah came into her life and she could admit that it was somewhat like that with Augusta. Now she realized that was what she was going to be and it wasn’t going to be like three months and then grownup like with Hibah. This was for a lifetime and that was different.

Standing there in the entryway of the bunker, Angela realized completely for the first time how terrifying the prospect of raising a child from birth to adulthood seemed and with no supernatural intervention to speed things up. It had her wonder if that was how her own mother had felt when she was growing up. All she remembered were the smiles even when she rushed and did things without a care or thought in the world. She must have worried her mother constantly and yet she was always all smiles and never let her see her fears, her worries. She didn’t even know that there were still nasty things about her and her birth going around because her mother stepped up as a de Medici and kept that away. It made her wonder if she would ever be what a mother should.

Not saying anything, Angela quietly turned and walked away to think about things. The library seemed to be a quiet space and it wasn’t like Sherlock or Gabriel would bother her. Not even her old Xana Samadean would be a bother and he was out with another kid. She sat in the plush chair that had been dubbed the sleeping chair since it was comfortable enough to fall asleep in and she had found both Winchesters asleep in it more than once during a late night of whatever was on their minds. And it was comfortable enough to ease the pain in her lower back.

“Is Mary gone?”

Angela looked up to see Sherlock passing through with a book that he was looking at. She replied, “Yes. She has to figure a few things out.”

Sherlock peered at her and then muttered in his Bostonian aristocratic accent, “A pity. I rather enjoyed the presence of someone who knew what they were doing.”

Angela hummed at that knowing that the Librarian liked her too, “And she liked you despite the fact that you said those things about Dean.” She remembered Mary’s reaction when Sherlock greeted Sam and Dean in his usual fashion.

“Well I wasn’t going to change my ways to suit her sensibilities,” Sherlock huffed, “At least she appreciated a good old fashioned library.”

Angela smiled as she watched him huff and puff away. She knew that it seemed strange that apart from her Sam and Dean living together, they acquired a Librarian which was an immortal human sort of, had a kennel of dogs, and an adolescent angel who was like the teen son of the house. Not to mention the occasional dropping in of angels that weren’t total dicks. She did have a strange family but it was like Bobby said, that family didn’t end with blood. She smiled in sad contentment and absently rubbed her abdomen as she recalled that.

She was still sitting like that, lost in thought when Sam found her after looking for her everywhere but there. He came up from behind and put a hand on her shoulder, “Hey.”

Angela looked up and replied, “Hey yourself.”

Sam pulled up a chair and sat across from her. “You… you okay?” He raised a brow slightly at his query.

“I should be asking you that,” she replied softly. “She is your mother.”

“But you know her too.”

Angela smiled at Sam. As worried as he had been that she ‘disappeared’ on him, he was still concerned about her feelings. “True… which is why I told what I did and that was to do what she wanted or had to do.”

“So you’re… agreeing to this?”

Angela paused to study Sam. She knew he was trying to understand what was going on and there were a hundred other things on his mind too. It was enough to make her want to shed a tear or two out of guilt for her part. She did manage to say, “It was what I wanted for her. When I met her… she knew the job but then she met John and…” She gave a slight shrug. “She came to me and asking me what to do.”

“And being you, you wouldn’t make it for her.”

“I don’t do that with anyone who comes asking me,” Angela pointed out. “And you know that I believe in choice.”

Sam knew that and nodded silently. He reached out and grasped her hand and held it in his. He rubbed his fingers on her skin. “I forget that you would know about things like this.”

“Not everything.”

Sam looked up at her when she said that and saw Angela looking downward at her hand caressing her abdomen. He had a scare this last hunt and had been worried since their kidnapping and rescue and even before then. Now… “What do you mean?”

Angela knew that Sam was prone to overthink things at times and he was probably thinking the worst case scenario. She looked up at him and moved the hand he had been holding to grasp his. She knew that things were going to change drastically. This was merely the first step and the chance to build a foundation for how things were going to be. Smiling she answered, “Just that this last job made things a lot clearer. Sam… I don’t think that I will be able to hunt anymore.”

Change is never easy to accept. Yet Angela knew that changes had to be made. There were more important things to worry about in the grand scheme of things. Like Mary, she had to take the steps to determining what that was and she had some idea as she looked at Sam and explained her reasons.


	4. 12.04 Light's Nightmare

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The case with Magda seemed to work out okay but maybe not as Angela suffers through a nightmare and Sam is trying to piece it together. Could it spell something more dire like with the British Men of Letters? Tag to American Nightmare.

_The mist was thick as it covered the ground and wrapped around the trees. The crickets and the frogs were making their noise as well as the other critters that happened to live there. She was running through probably a bayou since she could recognize the squelching of mud and grasses. She was running from something. She didn’t know what but it had her scared and that was downright terrorizing scared._

_She continued running through until she entered a normal type forest. She stumbled but didn’t fall. It was a good thing too as she pressed a hand to her swollen abdomen and took a deep breath. She couldn’t stay for long though since she could hear her pursuer behind her. It was coming. It was coming after her._

_She started running again until she came across a fence. It led to a barn and rounding the corner was a house. It looked familiar but that wasn’t on her mind. Something was after her and she had to get away. She was definitely putting the flight in fight or flight and she had good reason to as she clambered up the stairs and entered the house._

_She was inside the house but she was going downstairs. Downstairs into the basement. She didn’t have time to think since she heard whatever it was chasing her upstairs. It was looking for her. So she kept going down and down until she reached the living room. She paused a moment to take a good look._

_Everyone at the table was dead, face planted in their bowl of stew except for two. One was a girl and the other was him. He was resisting from a spoon being put in his mouth. The girl was staring straight ahead with dead eyes and a spoon was in front of her full of food and she was going to be fed it. She was going to stop it when she heard the slam of the door. He was there._

_Fear took over and she ran. She opened the door and ended up in a bathroom. It was like those at a rest stop. She was staring wide eyed. In front of her was a man in black. It was like any man and she could have easily taken him out but something evoked fear and she looked down at the arm that was extended towards her._

_She had seen guns before. She used them when she hunted but something about this gun evoked fear in her, like she couldn’t move. She looked up in terror at the man in black. The coldness, void of all emotion as he pointed his weapon at her. She opened her mouth to speak when he pulled the trigger and fire bloomed in her chest._

_She collapsed… at least she thought she did. She went down but then all of a sudden she was vertical and she felt dizzy. She was in a clearing that looked like. It looked like the place that Lucifer would take her to once… she began to panic and started looking for a way out and screaming to be let out. She tried running out of the circle but ended up coming back in another way._

_Her breathing came in pants and she was in danger of hyperventilating. She put a hand to her chest and ne protectively on her abdomen as she whirled around. She felt burning pain like it was on her foot and grimaced before looking up and her gaze lighted on a familiar presence._

_It was Sigrid. She was staring at her like a reaper would; impassive and uncaring. That wasn’t right. She blinked and saw Tasha step out in that calm demeanor she acquired since becoming shamaness. She looked at her and said something. It was hard to hear…_

_“Danger.”_

_Turning suddenly revealed the man in black. He loomed like a shadow and he seemed to get bigger. His hands were reaching towards her, towards her precious treasure…_

Angela gasped as she opened her eyes and looked around to find that she was in her room at the motel they were stopping over in on their way back to Lawrence. She sighed at the welcome look of the usual and closed her eyes and sighed in relief. She gripped the sheets and then released them as she opened her eyes again to find that she was alone.

For a moment she had a brief moment of panic but she remembered what was going on. She wrapped her arm over her abdomen in a comforting gesture and to reassure herself that everything was okay. She remembered why she was even there.

Dean had been acting more of an ass than usual when the case landed in their laps. She knew it was because Mary had left and she was in full support of it and she made that known to both brothers. Dean took it more like a betrayal and in it was mingled with other emotions so he ended up being an ass and she let it be known since she was past the point of being nice and the end result produced tension that thick enough to be cut with a knife.

It also didn’t help that Sam was being unusually clingy and insisted she come despite the fact that she said she wasn’t going to hunt anymore. Well she didn’t hunt per se. More like she was the voice of reason when talking to the coroner and she did have one secret weapon that helped getting the priest to cooperate and that sort of lessened the tension but not a whole lot.

As it turned out, it was another one of Azazel’s children that had been giving bloody renditions of the crucifixion. Magda had been made to feel inferior and that she was possessed by the devil for having her abilities. Sam managed to talk her down and convince Magda not to kill her crazy mother and thus putting her on a path to a second chance and a slight surprise.

Angela was not reluctant to physical forms of affection. In fact, Sam always gave that as much and the new improved Gabriel liked hugging her from time to time. Even Sherlock occasionally gave a physical show of affection and that threw things for a loop since he was always snarky with them. So it was a big and welcome surprise when Magda took a look at her and gave her a hug. It certainly had Angela looked wide eyed and down at the girl until her arms wrapped around her.

Magda hung to her while the EMTs checked her out and the social worker came to take her. It had Angela in a bit of an awkward position since the girl didn’t want to let her go. Eventually she did but after Angela put her hand to her shoulder. It also sent a strange feeling down her spine the moment she touched her. Angela brushed it off and brushed Magda’s hair as she said good bye to her and that she was going to be okay with her aunt.

The uneasy feeling didn’t go away though but it didn’t help that the baby decided to be unusually active. It was enough to beg Dean to stop for the night and she went to bed without another word. Then that… whatever it was… happened.

Slowly getting up, Angela moved about the room and looked around. She shivered from a sudden chill that matched the feeling from her dreams. Hissing from the cold she rubbed her arms trying to get warm. She also paced to get her blood going.

_Shifa’…_

Angela paused when she heard her name and looked around. She prayed that it wasn’t her mind going crazy again. That hadn’t happened in a long time and was one of the more… detrimental effects from her time in the cage. Then again it could have been…

_Shifa’… danger…_

The voice came again and Angela shifted and turned to look in the mirror. She saw Sigrid and Tasha in the mirror. They were looking at her with somber and yet worried expressions. It was then black smoke filled the mirror and there appeared the man like the looming shadow he was and it was right behind her. It forced her to turn and there he was. That was impossible! She shrieked when he put his hand into his coat and pulled out… Black smoked swirled around making it seem larger than what it probably was. She screamed.

Angela felt a hand on her shoulder and reacted by reaching out and grabbing the hand and giving a bone crushing squeeze as she growled out, prepared to defend herself and her baby. She was not going to let that thing touch her. She squeezed harder.

“It’s me!”

Angela opened her eyes the moment she heard the pain laced protest. She looked to find that she had grabbed Sam’s hand and was squeezing it and it was looking red. She released it, horrified at the thought that she had crushed his hand and gasped while moving back to the point she almost fell out of bed. She was saved when Sam grabbed her by the wrist.

Sam had expected something that would leave a mark the moment he had been woken up by her restless moving and realized that she was dreaming. He didn’t expect her to grab his hand and squeeze like she did but he recognized the growl that emanated from her throat and what it meant which is why he nearly shouted at her. He didn’t mean to startle her so badly and he noticed the look on her face. He barely managed to grab her when it was clear that she was going to fall off.

It took him by surprise when she grabbed him and actually sobbed. It had him searching his memory the last time she cried but it helped as he wrapped his arms around her, his hands moving towards her abdomen to make sure the baby was okay. He still had trouble believing that Chuck and Amara meant what they said and he just wanted to make sure. He also cursed himself for insisting she come but more for research, not the heavy lifting.

Angela murmured something and Sam shifted hear her and felt her arms tighten around him, her fingers gripping his shirt. He muttered, “It’s okay, Angie.”

“No it isn’t. It’s dark and shadow…”

Sam blinked at that. Did Amara…? He paused when he heard her say something else and it made him realize that she wasn’t talking about Amara but something else. He wasn’t sure of what it was since it was muttered in half a dozen different tongues. The last time she did this, her main problem was seeing Lucifer and having trouble distinguishing reality from illusion. She had nightmares and had trouble sleeping. He was certain this was a nightmare.

“He… she’s…”

Sam murmured, “Calm down.”

“Chills… Tasha! Sigrid!”

Sam was startled when Angela pushed him away and leapt out of bed. It was feat considering how… big she was. He watched as she jumped to her feet and then downward. She wasn’t looking at anything in particular but she was deep in thought but her expression looked like someone in terror. Sam didn’t like it and was on his feet and tried to get her attention while slowly approaching her, “What’s wrong Angie?”

Angela blinked. She could still feel the chill from seeing that man or whatever it was and Sigrid and Tasha there. She heard Sam talking to her and she looked at him and saw the look of concern on his face. Taking in her surroundings she realized that she was safe. This was real. Looking at Sam she apologized, “I’m sorry.”

To Sam, she didn’t need to apologize. Something was bothering her and he aimed to help her in whatever way he could. He slowly pulled her into his arms, “You have nothing to be sorry for. I’m here. You don’t have to be afraid.”

It was overly simple but it was very effective. He had said the same thing to her when they took their relationship to the next level. It relaxed her because it meant more than simple fears of things like spiders and such. And it proved to work once more because she relaxed enough to let him take charge and get her comfortable enough to talk or at least soothe her back to sleep.

It was nearly an hour later before they were back in bed. Sam was petting her hair and watching her as she cuddled into him, refusing to let go of him. He didn’t mind at all and showed it my pulling her closer… well as close as she was able to get. It was seriously going to cut into sleep time and possibility driving time but… she was important.

The past several months had been difficult. Sam wasn’t going to deny that and it seemed to fall worse on her because of her heightened emotions from being pregnant. He wasn’t going to pretend that it wasn’t an issue because it was. He was the one that saw the physical toll even though she was trying her hardest to not overdo it. He wished that he could do something more.

“It’s not your fault,” she murmured half asleep. “Never was.”

Sam looked at her and was going to say something before she continued, “I opened the gate. Why? Why are you back from the other side?”

It took Sam a moment to realize that she wasn’t talking to him but to someone else. It was clearly on her mind and figuring it was best, he played along, “Maybe that’s an answer you have to find.”

“It’s dark. Shadow but not her. He is coming. He’s chasing after me…”

Sam listened to her babble until she drifted into a deep sleep. He waited until he was certain that she wasn’t going to start twitching in her sleep again. She moaned a little and started babbling in one of the dozens of languages that she knew of and he stroked her hair more and started humming the song that he had hummed when he was the British Men of Letters prisoner and watched as she calmed down. He was restless as he settled down to try and catch a few more hours of sleep.

He didn’t know what was going on and it seemed to have started when she said that she wasn’t going to hunt anymore. And he had to go and ask her to come because he wanted her to be there and because he was still being overprotective after what happened. He said that Dean was having problems because Mom left but he was going through a few of his own and she was worried about it too. This seemed to be like one of those times where it got worse before it got better. But as he settled down, he got a sudden chill down his spine that had his breath hitch slightly. He felt Angela stir slightly but then relax but the chill was still there.

Sam had learned a lot of things since Dean picked him up from Stanford. He learned even more when Angela joined them and the one thing he learned, albeit the hard way at times, was to listen when the feeling was there and persisted. This was a chill and it didn’t feel good. It left a door open to something that could possibly come down the road and it wouldn’t be pleasant. He thought about this as he nuzzled her head and placed a gentle kiss on her head. He laid awake as he held his wife and thought about what this meant and prayed that it wasn’t another nightmare to come.


	5. 12.05 The Waiting Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Dean are on a job and Angela stays behind for obvious reasons aka a little bundle of joy in two months. However there is a benefit in that she will always be that light waiting for them to come home. Tag to The One You've Been Waiting For.

It is said that patience is a virtue and by every right it should be. Patience was what was required when faced with the most serious of missions and it could even be extended to things that required much attention to detail. In short it was a virtue especially when you were faced with the reality that there were things you couldn’t really do anymore especially if it was something you had done most of your entire life.

Angela looked up at the clock that she made Dean hang up in the main hall where the work tables were. She actually had him hang them up everywhere. Her excuse was that there were no windows for her to look out at the sun and the shadows in the bunker but in truth, it was a weird sort of comfort that she could count the hours until they came home. To some it was torture but it helped her get through the day as she started teaching herself to be more domestic.

It was a choice and one she acknowledged because in a couple of months she was going to be a mother and she realized she couldn’t be doing the things she once did. That was the hard part since she had always said she would take care of it and all it was could end up being something that would scare a normal person and have Sam and Dean thinking she was crazy even though they had seen her do it enough times to not be that freaked out. Things she had a pleasure in she had to reevaluate and change since now it was more than her life on the line.

It wasn’t too hard to be domestic. She was the one that, as Dean put it, took care of them with the cooking, cleaning and laundry but they were still hunters and on the move even with the bunker as a base of operations. So it wasn’t too bad since she knew how to do that. It was just not including the daily workout routine which included having Wilder pups play attack you and performing training regimens what would have given Sam a heart attack if he saw what she did.

She contemplated fielding queries for hunters since she didn’t want to feel useless though Sam and Dean insisted that she was anything but that. The upside was that it would give her and Sherlock something to do since he had just about catalogued and sorted everything in that library ten times over and Gabriel helped on occasion. It was something to think about once the baby was born and she didn’t feel like a beached whale. At the moment she was keeping the home fires burning until the boys returned from another job and one that brought about some rather painful memories.

Dean had found the job where an antique dealer and a rich old lady were torched to death and in a spontaneous combustion type of way. At the time he was still being a bit of an ass because Mary left them. Angela had to admit he had gotten better but being the stubborn ass of a Winchester he was, he still was adverse to talking about things until it became too much. Then he came to her or he actually talked to Sherlock or Kesset or someone he trusted enough. It was better than nothing she thought.

Anyway it sounded grossly familiar and when Dean described it, she got that ominous feeling in the pit of her stomach. It was enough for her to inspect their gear after they did and loaded it up just for her own peace of mind. It didn’t fool Sam since he was well aware that this was the first time she was being left behind and this time by choice and for her own good. He let her inspect and fuss until she was satisfied enough to let them go, giving her a kiss on the cheek and blowing his breath gently across the left side of her neck. Dean was another story.

Dean fussed at her fussing no matter what it was. For years their whole battle was over his laundry system, specifically his socks. She insisted on washing them and him wearing a clean pair every day and he spouted back that he had a system and it worked. So when she fussed over his gear, he fussed right back stating he had a system for his stuff and that she needed to stop messing with it. He was his usual gruff manner and she was used to it but she couldn’t help but let out a fat couple of tears and she cursed her hormones. In the end they kissed and made up and Dean let her give him an extra tousle to his hair and they left with their dogs in tow and her parting ‘be careful’ on her lips.

The feeling didn’t go away as she went about doing chores like keeping the bunker clean. She nearly had Gabriel freak out and he snatched a box of blades she had pulled out of a closet to have Sherlock check for curses and to clean them. He became more freaked out when she tried to get into the gun case and cited that she was being crazy for touching dangerous stuff. She tried not to huff at it since there were a couple of poisoned blades and Gabriel decided to clean the guns that didn’t make it into the duffle himself but she did get some laughs out of it and she ended up yelling at them both for treating her like chinaware. That only resulted in her shorting out a couple of lightbulbs with her temper, which she had to replace.

The phone call was a welcome relief and she said that she couldn’t wait for them to get back since she was ready to kill the librarian and his prepubescent angel helper. It produced laughs from Sam and Dean and it made her feel better plus they also asked her a couple of questions and she figured it out that the Thule were back in business and it only made that nasty feeling come back and in full force. It made her anxious enough that she was desperate to use a viewing stone that she had found when they first came to the bunker and hid once she realized what it was. As it turned out, she didn’t have to.

She didn’t know if it was her or Sam or both, any option was plausible, but she ended up seeing what Sam was seeing as they came face to face with the resurrected Hitler. It made her blood boil the moment she heard the words and the demeanor. It made her angry enough that she blew out another couple of bulbs and it caught the attention of Gabriel. It made her angry enough that she just reacted.

She had promised not to play with her spirit shamaness warrior thing since the last time gave Sam and Dean a scare with the whole British Men of Letters thing. Yet, she couldn’t let this go. She wasn’t sure how she did it but the moment Gabriel touched her shoulder, she found her spiritual body in that hangar with the Winchesters. She could also see a girl on a gurney looking very loopy like she was on drugs and more members of the Thule were around. She rounded on Hitler and looked at him.

His appearance was different yes but she knew it was his soul in that body of his Nazi necromancer. She remembered when she first met him in 1939 with the invasion of Poland. She had gone to that country in search of an artifact for the Centurion mostly because it was of that madman’s rise to power. Several analysts within the order had been paying attention to the world news and they insisted that she remove it before he discovered it. That… came at the cost of a country being overrun by German troops and war occurring.

Angela couldn’t help herself and helped the Winchesters once the girl got a hold of the gun and shot one of the Thule. She made herself visible long enough to give Hitler a good scare. She was certain he would remember the she-devil that he encountered when he invaded Poland. It was brief but enough and she was gone by the time Dean took care of the rest and she was back in her body and looking at Gabriel who was looking at a cross between upset and freaked out.

“Cat, that was the stupidest thing you ever did,” he started screaming.

“Like you’re one to talk,” was all she said as she stood up with a satisfied smirk and went towards the kitchen.

Afterwards it was more of the bickering and Angela reminding Gabriel that he was under her roof and therefore her rules that he had to obey otherwise he could try on his own. It certainly had him pout for the remainder of the time there when he did what she asked. It certainly made her laugh when he oh so reluctantly ate his vegetables otherwise he wouldn’t get any dessert. It was hilarious since he was an angel and could undermine her authority but he didn’t since he didn’t want to suffer her wrath since she had already destroyed more than a couple of light bulbs, a thing he considered minor since she could have easily destroyed the library and driven Sherlock mad. Or happy since he was happiest when sorting and cataloguing.

Angela took it in a stride and went out keeping the bunker clean and anticipating when her boys would be home. Since it was a couple days drive, she had a couple of days to further get used to the fact that she was going to be here in the bunker for the long run. It wasn’t too bad though as she finished what she was doing in the kitchen and when to the main hall to the chair that Castiel had brought for her. It was intended to rock a baby to sleep but it was more comfortable than any other chair other than the sleeping chair and it gave her a good view of the entrance since she was still wary about the Men of Letters returning despite the extra precautions she took.

Sitting down, she reached over into the basket she kept and pulled out a project she had started and was sort of a tradition since the day one of her strays had a baby of their own. She just never thought that one day she would be doing it for her own and she contemplated this as she looked over the other day’s previous stitches and fingering the softest wools she had been able to acquire. She looked at the patterning she had already done and anticipated when it would be finished. Smiling, she picked up her knitting needles and continued to work while she waited.

~0~0~0~0~

The job was done and the Winchesters were heading back to the bunker, back to home. To each brother, there was a certain amount of curiosity as well as trepidation since this was a first in a very long time that they didn’t have the constant in their lives with them. They agreed it was a good thing but it was something that needed to take time to get used to. Except this first time wasn’t without a few questionable things.

The check in phone call was funny enough with Gabriel complaining like a teenager, and in fact he was, about what Angela had been doing and that she was a tyrant and that Sherlock was being mean. In the background was Angela saying that he was being over dramatic and she didn’t sound fazed at all when Gabriel moaned and groaned at her. It was even more hilarious when Sherlock actually begged them to hurry it up since she was doing things to his cataloguing system and on purpose.

Dean thought it was just his girl getting bored and she was amusing herself. He ended up being a little mean and called it nesting as the baby books said. Yeah he read a couple and kept it in mind now that it was getting closer to that time and he did notice she was a little more emotional. Sam, on the other hand, worried like an old woman over the fact that there was some merit to their complaints since she was the type to do ‘chores’ and that included things like cleaning knives and guns and occasionally dealing with laundry though the last one wasn’t a big deal. So it had them a little anxious and curious as to the state of home would be.

It didn’t get any easier when Dean pulled the Impala into the garage and parked her next to Deanna. He looked at the other car and made a note to get her tuned up and looked at. He loved his sweetheart but he also had a soft spot for the car that had saved their collective asses time and again. There was truth to that adage that if you treat your ride right, she would treat you right or the what goes around comes around thing to the point that karma was a bitch. It did give Dean something to smirk at as he watched his younger brother try to be calm and cool about this.

If they expected to find a state of chaos in the bunker, they were in for disappointment. Rather, the bunker looked like it had undergone a cleaning that it hadn’t seen since they moved in. Dean swore he could smell cleanser all over the place that it had him wonder if the asshole librarian put up a quarantine zone to protect their resources. It certainly was clean enough that it would qualify as a clean room and it certainly was proven when the puppies came trotting up, yipping at their sibling Keiko and Shadow in greeting.

Dean took a look at them and then at Sam and said, “Dude, she washed the dogs too.”

It was evident since the female puppies had been given ribbons for their collars and the males had bow ties. It had them wondering if their girl went crazy or overboard or she did it to amuse herself and because they were puppies and they loved their alpha, they did it happily. It certainly made him, Sam and Keiko and Shadow seem like dirty street urchins and it had them feeling like they had to take off their shoes cause if they tracked mud in then they were in trouble. Dean was prepared for a laugh but also to run just in case as he and Sam followed the pack of puppies that still were not imprinted to where she was waiting.

Dean long gave up the idea of a domestic life. True he had tried it and still had a thing going with Haley but he never felt that it was for him and part of that was at the time he didn’t have everyone that meant something in his life there with him. Now that they had the bunker to call home, he could get used to it and he liked the constant battles between him and Angela over the kitchen since they both liked to cook and he ended up being the sorcerer’s apprentice again in that regard. So it wasn’t too much of a shock and yet it was to walk in to find Angela sitting in a rocking chair and knitting while Gideon, her dog, was at her feet lounging but ever alert.

It certainly was fun to watch the relief pour into Sam’s features even though he didn’t show it much. For Dean, this was excellent blackmail material but then again he knew his brother would always be the overprotective watchdog with their girl and even more so when the newest addition came. He wasn’t saying that he wouldn’t be the same, he would. Just not that much.

Looking at his girl, Dean grinned and said, “Looks like the place is still standing.”

“My house. My rules. Let’s not confuse things,” she replied with a smile and put away her knitting to stand and greet them both with a hug.

Dean was not willing to argue on that and neither was Sam. Both had seen what she could do and it was evident with Gabriel passed out over a book he had been reading and making notes on. She made the angel do homework. That was a new one and already confirmed to Dean that she would be a great mom. He gave her a hug, still not used to feeling the baby bump and replied, “Not arguing with that considering you made the little guy over there do homework.”

“He has a lesson with Sherlock.”

It sounded so weird and yet it was their normal. Dean wasn’t complaining especially when he went into the kitchen to find that she had baked pie and quite a bit of it. He almost wanted to grab her in a hug when he discovered she had made her peach cobbler and if he checked the freezer, the ice cream was there for a la mode. Looking at the pie, Dean then took a look around the kitchen and noted that she had made him and Sam a meal just in case they came in late. She thought of everything.

“I figured the guy who killed Hitler deserved something special.”

Dean turned to see Angela in the doorway of the kitchen grinning at him. He raised his brow, “How do you know that?”

Angela gave a shrug and replied, “Ways and means.”

“I wish you two didn’t do that,” Dean pouted but not really meaning it. He couldn’t pout anyway when Angela came close enough to rub his head like she always did.

“Why not? Comes in handy don’t you think?”

Dean couldn’t deny that it did come in handy even if it was done sparingly if a word could be put to it. He made a slight face but it turned into a grin since he really wasn’t mad. “Yeah and you’re always right on that note Angie.” He looked around and teased, “Nesting?”

“Bored out of my skull,” she replied with a grin.

Dean wasn’t fooled by that. She probably was anxious. He hadn’t missed the signs when she insisted on checking his gear along with Sam’s and he felt like an ass for making her cry when he teased her as usual. “Still it’s nice. Nice to come home to a well cooked meal and pie.”

“Cobbler is not pie.”

“Whatever. You know what I mean.”

Dean couldn’t help but smile when he heard her give that genuine chuckle that meant she was happy. Sam may get the giggle and the laugh but he got the chuckle. He gave one in return and looked at her. “It is nice Angie. I know that… that you are probably not liking it that you’re not out there with us but… It did help know that you and the kid are safe here.”

Dean looked at her but she didn’t say anything. No doubt she was letting the words sink in. He knew it was her choice to stay behind and with good reason and he agreed. Now that he was going to become an uncle, it made him more determined to keep him and Sam out of trouble and to make sure that nothing bad would happen to her and the kid. Shuffling a bit on his feet he added, “To be honest, I know that you’re Sam’s girl and all but… it gives me something to look forward to you know. I mean when the kid comes and…”

Dean was surprised when he was enveloped in a hug. He was not a hugger by nature unless he was overwhelmed with emotion and broke form and engaged in chick flick moments but he always welcomed a hug from her. It surprised him and he could really feel the baby bump since she insisted on the bear hug but he relaxed and hugged her back. He didn’t want to let go when she broke it but he let her.

“Then I’ll be here waiting for you both to come home,” she said. “And I’ll never leave you. You know that.”

How could Dean forget that? It was actually an unspoken thing and then it became a promise. She would never leave him or Sam willingly and would fight tooth and nail for them yes. Yet she would also wait for them; she would wait for them to come home like a light being left on to greet them when they came.


	6. 12.06 A Fox's Sunlight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jodi may be possessed but it is clear that she has specific ideas and feelings about Angela and they both share about what it means to lose and live. Tag to Celebrating the Life of Asa Fox.

“Sam.”

Jodi Mills blinked along with everyone in the room as Angela took out a very shiny silver stick that was about the size of the angel blade and slapped her left on it and extended her arm to reveal a sharp blade that was actually a sword. Jodi had seen a lot ever since the Winchesters and Angela walked into her life even though she had known Bobby Singer for quite a while. This was something else as she watched as Angela handed it over to Sam who didn’t even seem fazed that she was handing him a sword but rather concerned that she didn’t have a weapon as he replied, “You are still carrying it around?”

“Better than the chakram and less chance of you or me hitting someone with it.”

“Couldn’t you have just brought the knife?”

“Left it in the car.”

Jodi realized she was looking at what must be a typical married couple thing between Angela and Sam and she had to admit that it was rather comical. It seemed out of place since they were stuck in a supernaturally warded house with a demon on their tail. A demon, which Angela was able to sniff out and startle the other hunters there except for the twins that seemed really cool with it at they were with what they just saw.

“Whoa, you can touch Absolution besides her? Now that’s way awesome since we heard that only the Malachi can wield it. Anyone else…” Max made a slicing motion across his neck.

“True for the most part,” Angela admitted but nothing more as her features went serious as she started looking around.

Jodi saw her nose twitch and prayed that she would notice. Inwardly she sighed thinking that all she wanted was a girl’s day with her feet up in front of the television and watching her chick flicks ad having a good gossip with Angela. Plus she wanted to show her what she had been making in her spare time in between being sheriff and raising two orphan girls who had issues that ranked up there with Sam and Dean’s issues. Also it was a means of getting Angela out of the bunker and away from two well-meaning and overprotective men, one of them who had every right to be since he was going to be a father in t-minus thirty days and counting.

“She disappeared!”

Jodi felt helpless as she watched Angela take a protective stance in front of Mary, the woman that was the mother to Sam and Dean. She heard the words in her own voice and rallied hard against the demon that had taken possession of her. She knew that Angela had smelled something was off and had been moving to take position. She had to hand it to the woman that she knew how to be ready and anticipate. All she could do was watch as the demon used her body to toss her friends like they were nothing more than rag dolls.

“Back off.”

Jodi knew that voice. There were many things that were universal constants. One was that moms meant business when they gave you the look. The other was the tone of a mom when she was getting in your face and telling you what to do. With Angela though it had always been a quiet request that had even Claire doing what she had been asked and then some and often a look. Here Jodi was seeing a much scarier version of that and one that had the underlying tone that the demon would pay if she wasn’t listened to.

Jodi watched as the demon tried to toss Angela but she stood her ground, like she was able to resist. It was a good thing too since she was at that stage where one wrong move could spell premature labor or other complications. Nope, she was still Angela just standing there as she glared at Jodi or rather the demon inhabiting Jodi’s body.

“I don’t need to be in your head since I remember you. You were the one that taught Asa that spell. You helped him send me to the depths. Guess you learned from the last time. By the way, how is it that you’re still standing after I broke your back?”

“What makes you think you did?”

Jodi knew that playful tone. It was serious and yet playful one that was geared to piss anything and anyone off and no doubt that it would raise questions with Sam and Dean. In Jodi’s mind, the girl was entitled to secrets. Being as old as she was, it should be Angela giving advice but it was often the other way around and Jodi had learned quickly that there were things the dhampir was deficient in with regards to people and relationships and sought to help her as much as she could.

“Oh I remember. You took care of my partner but I led you on a chase. You almost had me. Almost stuck me with that infernal blade, which I still don’t understand why a thing like you is considered worthy to carry it. Much less a Winchester.”

“I still wonder that myself even with all that I know now.” Angela advanced with her right hand raised. “Now leave Jodi, now.”

“I don’t think so. After all I like torturing you as much as Asa.”

Jodi didn’t like where this was going and would have fought but she heard voices murmuring and realized that the hunters in the room were reciting an exorcism, including Angela. It was a relief to feel the demon being pulled out and it was so not fun being possessed. It was alleviated a little and a bit scary that the demon didn’t get sent to hell but rather pulled into a smoky ball that floated on Angela’s hand.

“For Asa and all the others.”

Angela then said something that was clearly not Latin and in a flash of light the ball of smoke was gone leaving burning embers that fluttered to the ground and died. Jodi was in slight shock as she allowed Sam and Dean to help her up. And yet, Angela just stood there with a calm expression but it looked a bit thoughtful as if she were remembering something.

“Seriously, are you a witch?” The twins were looking at Angela.

“No. Just a pissed off expectant mother,” Angela replied before giving a slight grin as she flexed her wrists to reveal the tattoos.

It was a relief that it was over even with the shadow hanging overhead about what Bucky had done to Asa. It was an accident but even Jodi thought that it was rather low to string him up and let everyone thing that it was the demon. She did notice that it seemed to put Angela in a thoughtful mood afterwards and one that Sam seemed to be in an internal debate on whether or not to address.

In the end, Jodi made the effort after Angela honored Asa, Elvis and Randy with a dirge. She stood by Angela as the woman sang a song that had words in a language no one knew but it carried the tone and meaning loud and clear. It even seemed to bolster Lorraine a little more even after learning that she had two grandchildren, the twins Max and Alicia. Staring at the funerary pyres, Jodi listened to the words as they were carried off into the wind. She felt the need to say something and got her opportunity when she stood by Angela as the woman looked out into the woods with Sam’s dog sitting next to her and said, “That was a nice song.”

“It’s a funerary dirge given to all who… died fighting the good fight.”

“Still nice,” Jodi offered. She looked at Angela and asked, “Do you blame yourself for Asa’s death?”

Angela looked at Jodi and replied, “No,” then looked back in the direction she was staring in and continued, “I do blame my part in the life he led. The same as Mary.”

“So Mary knew Asa?”

“She saved him when he was a boy.”

That was something Asa never told Jodi about. While it was something that could be held a grudge over, it was not worth it. Jodi learned, particularly from Angela, that there were some things that were too painful or two precious to share and she didn’t hold a grudge with that. People were entitled to secrets. It made trusting them harder but people had their reasons.

“And because I touched Mary’s life, I touched his both directly and indirectly.” Angela made a slight snorting sound as she added, “Such a little pain in the ass and nearly got himself killed thinking I was the thing he had to hunt. Had to teach him a few things.”

“You seem to know everybody.”

“Most folks, yes.” Angela paused and sighed a bit before continuing, “I did teach Asa that rite. And the demon did break my back. I was just lucky that someone saved me.”

“Glad they did,” Jodi admitted. “You may be a little scary with all that stuff you do but… you do a lot to help people. Can’t imagine the world without you.”

Angela hummed at that as she looked out at the landscape. She thought about something for a moment before saying, “A friend of mine once said that death is not really the end of things. They live on because we remember the things they did in life.”

“And what do you remember?” Jodi couldn’t help but ask the question since she was curious like Sam about what Angela had seen and done. After all, to talk to someone who basically lived through history, it was pretty impressive.

“Too much of everything,” Angela replied. She then turned to look at Jodi with a smile. “Mostly my strays that I have met over the centuries. The ones I trained to be hunters. The ones who tagged along until they found what they wanted to do in life… and the ones who became family no matter how hard I resisted.” She shifted to look in a different direction.

Jodi turned to see Angela looking at Sam and Dean with their mother talking. She noted the slight smile on the woman’s face and recognized it as her happy smile. It was better than nothing even if it wasn’t a full blown smile. “Well you have a good heart Angie.”

“Not sure about that, Jodi. I still have reservations about… being a mother. With everything I’ve done…”

“It’s about as much as the same as us normal humans going off to fight in a war and coming back. A little different,” Jodi allowed after some thought, “But about the same. I’m the sheriff of Sioux Falls and occasionally I have to get rough with it and draw a gun. And I did it to make sure my son was growing up safe. It’s what being a parent is.”

Jodi knew that it was going to take some time for it to sink in but she figured Angela was on the way to being a parent since she already fussed over the Winchesters and the way she handed Claire and Alex… It was different when it was your own though and that was something Angela was going to learn.

“Thanks Jodi.”

Jodi looked at Angela as the woman turned to look at her. “You don’t have to thank me…”

“I do,” Angela replied with a full smile. “You… put things into perspective for me and… it really helps.” The smile turned into a teasing grin as she added, “Asa always said that you were good at that and in creative ways.”

Jodi felt her eyes widened at that and then she narrowed them as she protested, “You did not…”

“We talked. More or less. The little bastard had a way of finding me.”

Jodi couldn’t help but laugh with Angela as they started walking towards the car. It was going to be crowded heading back to the states but the journey seemed to head down a path towards the lighter. Jodi decided that Angela was right in that death wasn’t the end of that person. They lived on in how people lived their lives. True she would give anything to have a moment with her son and husband alive and well with her again and she would be scared about it but they were alive in the memories that she had of them and the lessons she passed on to Alex and Claire. Maybe that was why Angela was a great parent and would make a good mother. She understood that on some level and while the whole thing scared her to death it seemed, she was more than ready.

“When we get back, please take back that onesie. Too much.”

Jodi looked indignantly at Angela and retorted, “It’s cute and perfect.”

“Please, I’ll have my hands full with the strange and unusual.”

Jodi couldn’t help but laugh at that. She really liked Angela and was willing to help her out in any way she could. She was glad that the woman trusted her enough to let her do that. She was surprised when Angela opened the door to a three way friendship between her, herself and Mary. Even though Asa’s death was like a sad cloud, from it came rays of light, rays of sunshine.


	7. 12.07 Rock of the Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They found Lucifer in LA as Vince Vicente and the devil reveals he still has a grudge and is out to have fun. He particularly reminds Sam that he knows all about his and Angie's relationship and the little bundle of joy to be expected. Sam and Kesset have a talk about what to do and what Sam had thought about for a long time now the stakes are even higher. Tag to Rock Never Dies.

“Guys. You know I could end you all with a snap of my finger?”

Yeah Sam and Dean knew that. Yet they had to try. Lucifer was dangerous and he killed for the fun of it. That was why they were there in LA. They had a shot at stopping Lucifer and they were going to take it.

“Why would I do that when you guys can’t do anything?” Lucifer sent Castiel flying back before he had a chance to set himself up to use his angel blade. Lucifer looked at the angel before feeling a sharp pain in the shoulder and turned to see a person he least expected. “Oh. So you came along.”

Sam blinked as he saw Kesset being grabbed and flung into a wall creating a sizeable dent. The Avian had come to help them in their attempt to capture Lucifer. He suspected that it was because Angela asked him to but he knew she wouldn’t send even her own guardians out if she couldn’t do anything. Kesset though said that he heard what he and Dean were planning and decided to help. It made Sam feel guilty since Kesset had a family, a daughter that he doted upon.

Kesset got to his feet quickly and spread his wings out, ready to do battle. “You shouldn’t be here.”

Lucifer stared at the Avian with a raised brow, “That it? At least she could have come up with something better.” He then looked around and asked, “Where is she? Where is my pretty?” He then looked at Sam and stared pointedly at him. “Oh yes. I remember. It’s about time isn’t it, Sam?”

Sam felt every fiber of his being wanting to react to that but he forced himself not to. He knew that Lucifer knew about the baby. And it was no secret to the devil about his relationship with Angela. He made that very clear the year and a half spent in hell. He glared at the devil.

Dean knew that it was a low blow to Sam. It also drove home the reality that their family was in danger because of the things they had all done. “Why are you doing this?”

Lucifer was willing to play along with this but he knew that he had Sam. It was his favorite thing to do. Once he got out he was willing to torture and piss her off if only to get her to be like how she was in hell. Then he found out about the little bundle of joy that was coming and it turned into something sweeter. He chuckled, “Why?”

“You and God made up. You forgave him,” Sam pointed out, “What would he think?”

“I’m not especially interested in his opinion but I wasn’t about to get my ass kicked by my little sister in the condition she is in thanks to you.” Lucifer pointed at Sam. He loved driving the knife in and twisting it. “Dear old dad, he finally apologize for abandoning me. And what’s the very next thing he does? He ditches me.”

Kesset made a snort at that. All heads turned towards the Avian. Dean was especially concerned since to him he was just a kid still that had a barely working knowledge of human quirks. Sam was worried that Kesset was getting himself into more trouble than he could handle but he had confidence. After all he was now captain of the royal guard and had picked up a few interesting abilities. Kesset snorted again and crossed his arms over his chest saying, “You sound like the pathetic noble assholes that I have to deal with. Babies every last one of them.”

It sounded something like Angela would say and she would come out and tell it like that. She would tell God himself to go suck it if she could but this was Kesset. It was enough to have silence come about for a minute. Lucifer stared at the Avian who defiantly stared back at him. He could end his life but then that would bring vengeful wrath and it didn’t matter if she was pregnant or not. He’d rather torment her in a different manner.

Gesturing at the Avian and then the Winchesters, he continued, “And he ditched you too by the way. And rides off into the sunset with Auntie Amara. He needed my help and he’d say anything to get it. His words, your words, they mean nothing.”

“And what about hers?” Kesset looked up at the devil with a pointed expression.

“What about hers?”

“Seems to me that the opinion that matters is hers. Otherwise you would have killed us all right about now.” Kesset shrugged and stood there expectantly.

“Now you’re being an idiot. You know as well as I that you don’t fuck with little sister’s toys. Not unless you want to be the next grand canyon.” Lucifer looked at the Avian like he was the dumbest thing alive.

“And that would be the thing that you wouldn’t care about and yet with her… you do. So why does she matter so much to you?” Kesset took a couple of steps forward to challenge Lucifer’s reaction. His wings were drawn and ready to aid him if he needed it. He looked up at the devil and asked again, “Why hers?”

Having enough, Lucifer growled and gave a swipe of his arm. Kesset was sent flying back hard and crashed into something. He growled out, “Don’t you get it. This is all meaningless. Heaven, Hell, this world… If it ever meant anything that moment is past. Nothing down here but a bunch of hopeless distraction addicts… so filled with emptiness, so desperate to fill up the void they don’t’ mind being serves another stale rerun of a rerun of a rerun.”

“And that is a temper tantrum of a little baby.”

Sam’s eyes widened slightly when Kesset responded. This wasn’t how he imagined this going down. The Avian was starting to sound like Angela and it was going to get him killed. The Avian though took it in a stride as he stood up and dusted himself off, brushing off the black jacket he had acquired that made his natural badass biker looking persona even more badass and he blended in with the crowd that came that night. Kesset looked at Lucifer and continued, “Nothing but a temper tantrum of a thing that doesn’t understand anything down here. And you are terrible at whining. At least my daughter knows how to look cute.”

It took a split second everyone to realize that Kesset was mocking Lucifer. It was enough to get his neck snapped and Lucifer held up his hand to do so but Kesset countered with a warning finger, “I wouldn’t do that. Unless you want the whole of my army coming down upon you. Not to mention the united army of the light. There are still rules here.”

Lucifer glared at the Avian and retorted, “You may be safe in your position as captain, Avian but remember that your father’s soul still belongs to me.”

Kesset stood there with a passive expression. No one needed to say anything about that. Despite the fact that his father had been set free from Azazel’s binding contract, he was still ultimately a pawn of Lucifer’s. It was one of those complex contracts that not even Crowley could break and the Avian would rather have his wings cut off than make a deal with the demon.

Lucifer stared at the Avian, thinking that he had won and looked at the others. “Now that’s settled, to answer your question. I don’t have a plan. I’m just gonna keep on smashing Daddy’s already broken toys and making you watch. Making her watch.”

“Then you will be in for a long road,” Kesset replied.

Lucifer chuckled at that, “Oh really?” He then looked at Sam and pointed at him, “Don’t forget I know everything about you two. Can you just imagine that when you least expect it, she is gone. It’s always fun to watch sweet innocence be turned against their nature.” He grinned as he noticed Sam tense up. “You will never be free for what you have done Sam. There will come a time when it will all be taken away and turned into the thing you fear the most.”

From there, it was downhill on Lucifer’s end as his vessel ended up burning out from too much use of power. It was a little satisfying in telling him that he was falling apart but in the end the fallen angel left his vessel and started the round of vessel hopping, leaving the corpse of his latest vessel rotting on the stage.

~0~0~0~0~0~

“I apologize for earlier.”

Sam gave a slight eye roll and his lip curled into a smirk as he turned to face Kesset. He noted that the Avian was not standing in the apologetic stance he used to take. He hadn’t done that in a long time and it made sense. He was captain of the very guard that used to torment him for being the son of Setna and an Avian. “You don’t have to apologize.”

Kesset made a slight sound as his wings rustled. He had no fear of anyone noticing them. Only the Winchesters, Castiel and anyone that knew what he was. “I do, Sam. I goaded Lucifer and for the express purpose of finding out his motive.”

“I’ll admit that I was surprised you did that,” Sam admitted before looking out at the darkness of night. “It sounded like something Angie would say.” He pursed his lips as he recalled the phone conversation he had earlier.

He wasn’t taking Lucifer’s threats lightly. The devil had tortured him for just having a relationship with her; for taking her as a mate as he put it. Now she was pregnant and almost ready to give birth… He gritted his teeth.

“You know that I won’t let anything happen.”

Sam had closed his eyes to think before opening them. He shifted to look at the Avian. “And what about Ayana?”

“My daughter is safe.” Kesset assumed a firm stance and crossed his arms over his chest. He stood shoulder to shoulder with Sam. He then glanced at Sam and gave a slight grin, “I did learn a few things being the princess’ guardian.”

Sam took in the grin. Apparently Kesset had a plan. “You are up to something.”

“Only to find out Lucifer’s intentions and it’s like you said. He was bad enough when he had a plan, a motive. Now that he is just having fun…” Kesset adjusted his arms and hummed a bit. “I informed Jibril. He will be on the lookout along with the Arbiters. They will keep an ear and eye out as your human expression goes.”

Sam took in Kesset’s report. He had grown the last few years. He looked away as he thought about what Lucifer said. He desperately wanted to be happy. He was going to be a father but… He sighed and wondered if Lucifer was right. That he would never be free of this and that he was going to bring his past and everything down upon his baby. He could only imagine what Angela was thinking about, which was why he had been circumspect with his report.

Kesset looked at Sam with a sympathetic look. This was hard on the younger Winchester. As a father himself he could relate but this was doubly hard. It was no secret that Lucifer had a thing for Angela. He loved tormenting her by making her see her failures despite everything she had done. Kesset knew that this assignment wasn’t going to be easy when the lady asked of him to watch over her adopted daughter. He did the rest once he got to know the Winchesters and others.

Sam leaned on the rail of the banister that enclosed the walkway of the motel they were staying in. He rubbed his hand on his head trying to think of his options. He looked down when he felt Keiko pawing at his leg. He had left her behind with Shadow in the car since they didn’t know what was going to happen when they went after Lucifer. He couldn’t help but smile slightly at the puppy who was considered the runt of her litter. Moira was the same and she ended up being a harridan.

Reaching down, Sam rubbed her ears. He knew that he had been a bit of a bonehead with accepting her as his dog. But the puppy had been insistent and Dean had a couple of laughs at his expense. At least Gideon was still at home. That dog was very much like Cerebus, a protector.

“Things will work out Sam,” Kesset said. He waited until Sam was looking at him and then looked outward. “We will do what we can to keep defenses up. After all you have an immortal Librarian, several Wilders and an archangel living under your roof.”

Sam snorted at that, “And she’s driving them crazy with her nesting.”

“And there are the wards in the bunker.” Kesset continued his list knowing that it was helping reassure Sam.

Sam knew what Kesset was trying to do and appreciated it. He knew this well and worked to keep that calm front to keep her reassured as she became further along and it became a strain. It helped but not a whole lot since the whole thing with the Men of Letters and now Lucifer weighed heavily on her mind. But there was still one thing that they needed to consider. “But Lucifer knows where we live. He could come in anytime.” He shifted to look at Kesset.

Kesset had come to this conclusion as well. He didn’t bring it up unless either Winchester did. He wasn’t going to destroy their confidence unless they realized they needed to change it up. “There is angel warding.”

“Even with Angie fixing it so Cas, Gabriel and Amitiel could come in… Lucifer would find a way.” Sam leaned forward and looked at the ground and thought about it some more. Then it came to him. There was one place that Lucifer didn’t know about.

Kesset stared at Sam and blinked. He could tell that he was thinking about things. There was a solution but he wasn’t going to say anything. It was ultimately up to Sam and in turn whether or not she would agree to it. He did prompt, “You have something in mind?”

“The cabin,” Sam replied as he looked outwards. He still leaned against the railing. It was not a bad idea. In fact he had been toying with the idea for some time. He just didn’t want to bring any pressure on her even if he did argue logically. He just wanted her to feel safe and it was different from being safe but not mutually exclusive. He looked over at Kesset and continued, “The cabin on the sanctuary that you gave her. No one really knows about it except me and Dean. And even then…”

“The fairies kept it protected,” Kesset confirmed. “Still have the marks from the last beating I took from them.”

Sam couldn’t help but snort. It sounded ridiculous but he wasn’t going to discount the fairies. “That and whatever else is living there. I wouldn’t be surprised if there was a real unicorn or a centaur there.”

Kesset made a slight sound at that and it made Sam look at him with a raised brow. The Avian wasn’t going to say anything since even he didn’t know all the creatures that were there. The fairies were the most visible. “Not saying anything but it wouldn’t surprise me. I do know that there is a dragon there.”

“You’re serious?”

“Deadly,” Kesset replied as he looked at Sam. “Not all dragons are evil. There are a few that just like living. And it is part of the sanctuary’s protective spells.”

There was a lot to that plot of land that wasn’t too far from the bunker. And deep down, Sam was relieved that there was a place to go to. That was his best bet. “Can this dragon stand up to an angel like Lucifer?”

“No idea but I think you know as well as I that he and anyone else would fight to the death. Everyone there loves the princess and quite a few were touched by her involvement. Certainly those renegades learned that when they dared to come after Kate.”

Sam felt his lip twitch when he heard Kesset’s wings rustle. He recognized it as the warning he gave before attacking if the unlucky person decided to pursue a fight. But the Avian had a point. There were plenty of people to go to for help if they needed it. They wouldn’t hesitate and he and Dean had seen it firsthand and it was all because of the woman he loved. She claimed that she was nothing more than a monster but even he thought that was a load of bullshit.

“So what do you want to do?”

The question was twofold and Sam knew that. It was a friendly question but the root of it was Kesset asking for his orders in that roundabout way of his. Sam figured it out when Angela had been kidnapped that long ago and the Avian was struggling not to go on a rampage of destruction. Since then, Kesset accepted orders from Sam like he would Angela but he had loosened up to the point where it could be a friendly conversation. Here though, Sam saw he was asking him so that he could do what he had to do.

Sam knew he was going to have to talk it over with her and then bring it up with Dean. He figured his brother would be in agreement since he had heard what Lucifer said and he was just as anxious as he to make sure that the baby was born safely. “Talk to her about it.”

“Understandable but you can exercise your authority.”

Sam hummed at that, “I know but… I can’t and won’t do that to her. It’s why I love her and something like this affects us both.” He stared at Kesset who seemed to not understand and he tried again, “She is a warrior, Kess.”

“I agree, which is why I support you.”

“Is that just following orders?”

“No.”

Sam looked at Kesset and the Avian explained, “I may be the princess’ guardian and by extent yours and Dean’s but… I am your friend.”

That was enough for Sam and he gave a slight smile as he patted Kesset on the shoulder. “Thanks Kess.”

“You’re welcome.”

The pair just stood there and looked out at the night sky. Sam knew that he couldn’t stop bad things from happening but he could make it difficult for Lucifer and he knew that Angela would bare her fangs literally and some day they would catch Lucifer and put him back. He would do what he could to protect her and their growing family. She had always been the one to stand strong and be the rock during the tough times. This time it was his turn.

Ever since he broke the last seal, he had been trying to make things right with her only to find that he didn’t need to. She had forgiven him even when he felt he didn’t deserve it. She forgave him, Dean, Castiel… It was her nature and as much as she could get pissed with Crowley, she was nice to the demon. The point was that she had done a lot for him and his brother and everyone else that they had come across with some paying the price for it and he saw how that hurt her. This… he could do this one thing for her and just be there when she needed him.

Resolved in what to do, Sam relaxed a little. Lucifer’s words still weighed heavily on his mind. There was no denying that what Amara and Lucifer said were true. Even Castiel sort of confirmed it and Gabriel, when he wasn’t going through puberty, mentioned it. It was weird and perverted in a way since Lucifer seemed to act like she was his and only his and he knew that the fallen angel would make her life a living hell while having his fun. The least he could do was provide her some peace of mind and be a rock like she was for him countless times.

Feeling better, Sam straightened up and was going to reach into his pocket when his phone rang. He pulled it out and looked at the caller ID and rolled his eyes. “Great.”

“I take it that it’s Gabriel.”

“Lucky guess.”

Kesset chuckled at that, “He never had a problem before.”

“That was before we got stuck with him growing up,” Sam muttered as he opened his phone and was immediately assault with a complaint about the latest thing Angela had done to the bunker while they were away coupled with a plea to get back as soon as possible. Yeah he was some rock.


	8. 12.08 Light of the Blood Lotus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They had a plan to drive Lucifer out of his vessel and back to the cage but it came with a price. Now Sam and Dean are heading to a black hole and no one knows about it save one. Kesset keeps to the skies and looks for a means of busting of them out. Tag to Lotus.

It was moving fast but it wasn’t going to get away and there was no way that it could hide. It glaringly obvious and it wasn’t too hard to keep pace. And it wasn’t like they could see they were being followed. No one ever bothered to look up since they never expected it.

Kesset adjusted his glide path as he flapped his wings. His eyes narrowed as it kept a bead on the truck below. He couldn’t lose sight of it. If he did… then he couldn’t be forgiven. Not by himself and certainly not by the princess.

The whole business of finding and taking down Lucifer was taking its toll on everyone. It was especially evident when he observed her and it was a no brainer as Dean would call it. It was Kesset’s job as a guardian to protect his charge to the best of his ability. He was willing to fight to the death to keep that but he knew that his charge would just bring him back to kick his ass and kill him herself.

Sam had broached the idea of her staying at the sanctuary especially when it became clear who Lucifer’s next vessel was. Kesset had to hand it to Sam for his ability to execute tact. If he wasn’t a hunter, he would have made a great diplomat between their worlds; Lady Amaterasu once made the offer to him.

In the end, she shot them down but not completely. Truth was, she didn’t want to leave her home. Kesset could understand that to a degree and he was certain Sam did after she explained herself. Dean took a little more to convince and he was agitated with Crowley poking around and making the comments he did. What made him understand was what she told him privately. She told him that Sam’s presence was what kept her safe and that she trusted him with her life. It was something that had held since the beginning.

Kesset could understand that devotion. For him, his Kate was his everything and from that came his beloved Ayana. It was because of the princess that his daughter was safe and alive today. His charge firmly believed that there was always a choice and if someone wanted to live in peace then they should be able to. He didn’t like what the Men of Letters did and he still wondered why Sam called them. True they gave the means of removing Lucifer and sending him back but Kesset feared that it would open the door to something that they wouldn’t be able to control.

_This isn’t over, Sam… And I will take what you hold dear._

_Not while I still breathe_ , Kesset thought to himself as he made a slight course adjustment. He had to make it look natural otherwise someone would get suspicious and try to shoot him down. The last thing he needed was him getting yelled at by the princess and his Kate for being careless. Now he understood what Sam meant when he told him that in most cases, there is no way to win when it came to the women of the house.

It was difficult getting Lucifer to show up. Kesset knew though that the fallen angel would have come like flies to honey if she were there and called out to him. It would have made things easier but it was pretty clear that it wasn’t an option since it was obvious. Also both Kesset and Sam knew that there was one thing that could be done but again it wasn’t an option. And it was one of the reasons why she allowed that fellow named Ketch to give a hand.

It was a victory in that Lucifer has been extracted but there was a cost. The poor girl was pregnant with a Nephilim and knowing his celestial comrade was probably going to terminate the pregnancy. It made him upset but he couldn’t worry about it just now. He had to keep up with his moving target if he was going to do what he had to do.

It had been a close call for him to get away. He heard them coming in and barely had a chance to warn the Winchesters. He would have stayed but Sam told him to get out. He was fortunate that they didn’t take heed of him in his animal form. But it made him angry that he couldn’t do anything and that was because Sam had to shout out his code word to not do anything.

Kesset may have been assigned to the adopted daughter of the Nile but he had been given more freedom than most guardians. He was free to interpret his orders and had to since she was very adept at circumventing things designed to keep her out of trouble. Because of that, he took it upon himself to be the guardian of the Winchesters though more specifically Sam even though Dean was the packaged deal. And that was a bit of Sam’s fault going back to when his charge had been kidnapped and tortured. Since then he didn’t hesitate to come when he perceived extreme danger or when they needed a hand.

_Fly._

Kesset narrowed his eyes as he followed his target. He was flying… but not what Sam had in mind. The goal was for him to head back towards the bunker… like some messenger bird… and protect her. Under normal circumstances, like the chances of eminent threat if Lucifer was still on the loose, he would obey that. In this case… he wasn’t going to. Instead he was following that metal box on wheels, learning where they were taking the Winchesters.

He hated the fact that those men called the Secret Service took them and yet he could understand why they reacted the way they did. After all their charge was unconscious on the ground and Sam and Dean were hovering over him. Then again they probably did overreact with taking them to wherever they were going and it was pretty far. He had never really flown this far before with the goal of hunting in this form. He was much more efficient in his humanoid form but considering how humans reacted to the strange and unusual…

The vehicle below made a turn and Kesset made an adjustment to his glide path. He started to wonder where they were going. He wasn’t going to break off since what he found out would help Castiel and the princess. He just didn’t look forward to making that revelation to her since he was certain of her reaction. At least one of them.

The truck finally stopped and Kesset made an adjustment to find a perch. It had to be close enough to see what he needed but far enough away to not be noticed by them. He landed on a tree and observed the men in the suits get into the back and pull out Sam and Dean. His bird’s eye rotated to take in the sight as he took a look at where they were being kept. He adjusted his wings and shifted as he watched the Winchesters be shuffled inside.

The door closed with a clang and Kesset got the impression that anyone that went in there wasn’t coming out. He knew that feeling when he had been captured and tortured and the few jobs he had done that could have been called what the Winchesters called a suicide mission. But like his charge, he didn’t like to think that there was always a way out. She and the Winchesters had proven that time and again in the years he had grown to know them. She had come up with the plan and he helped to execute them when she needed him.

“We’ll keep them in there. Find out about them.”

Kesset looked down and saw a couple of the suits outside. He twisted his head to hear better what they were saying. His eyes widened slightly when the implication was clear that the Winchesters would more than likely be kept there indefinitely. That was going to make things a little difficult but not improbable or impossible.

He continued to watch the building, taking in the perimeter and everything that was worth his notice. Even if it took him weeks, he would scout out the entire place. One way or another he was going to get the Winchesters out of this place… this garrison. He tweaked his head when he felt the tick that was so familiar. He knew who that was and while he didn’t want to, he ignored it, and focused on the building and continued to ignore it as he flew around and scouted the place, looking for any sign of the Winchesters.

The tick kept coming through and Kesset ignored it. He didn’t mean to be rude and ignoring her but… He was going to do this and get her mate back. He waited until she gave up before finding his perch and tentatively reached out. _Sam. Dean._

It was a long shot but he was willing to try it. Being a guardian had its perks and he could develop connections as he wanted. It was easier though when the person had a strong connection to the one that he had pledged his guardianship to. At this point he was willing to try anything. He tried again, _Sam. Dean._

_Kess?_

Kesset adjusted his position on his perch. He had made contact. _It’s me, Dean._

_What the hell?_

_What you call a perk of the job. I followed you._

_You what? Kess?_

Kesset blinked and made a chirrup at the fact that he heard two voices in his head. He jerked his head and turned to look at the building. _That’s interesting._

_Kess._

Kesset blinked since he couldn’t roll his eyes. _I followed you here._

_I told you to go back to her._

_Not an option, Sam._

_And what are you going to do? You can’t exactly march in and tell them that you are with the Guard or whatever and you need us._

Kesset puffed his chest slightly at that. _I know that. Which is why I am scouting. I am going to find a way to get you out._

_No. Go back to Angie._

_Yeah Kess. You can keep her from doing something stupid._

That was partially the truth but Kesset knew that truthfully no one made her do anything she didn’t want to do. In the end she decided on that. _You know as well as I that she won’t listen to me… unless I had the means for her to act._

There was some more protests but Kesset calmly told them off. There was no dissuading him from this. He was going to find the way to get them out. She may be angry with him but… He owed that much and more to her. She was the one who literally set him free from the scrutiny he carried most of his life. She showed him that he could do his job and be proud of it and he didn’t have to be ashamed of what he was. She was a light to many including him. He would do this for her. He would find a way to get the Winchesters out.


	9. 12.09 First Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mary finds another reason to stick around after helping Sam and Dean with their escape from federal custody and witnessing the birth or her granddaughter. Tag to First Blood.

“She’s so beautiful Sam.”

Mary stood in the doorway of the motel room, leaning against the frame watching as Sam reached with a tentative finger to stroke the cheek of the bundle that her best friend was holding. Her heart swelled with emotion as Sam sat next to her friend resting on the bed and peered at the newest edition to the Winchester family.

Jessica Mary Winchester.

That was the name of her granddaughter, born the day that her father and uncle made it out wherever they were held with the help of their Avian friend, Kesset and the night that Castiel killed Billie the Reaper to save them. A beautiful thing in light of everything that seemed to be filled with despair.

Sam and Dean had been gone for over six weeks and Angela was going on two days overdue when Castiel called her about the boys. It was a miracle to hear something and it ended up being a firm insistence from Angela to go with them. Mary knew her friend was the most stubborn woman alive and even though she was heavily pregnant, she still was moving about and looking for anything that could help.

They ended up asking the British Men of Letters for help despite Angela’s objections. Mary suspected that they had a history and one that angered her friend. It was something she kept in mind but this was Sam and Dean on the line. It seemed to be the right thing to do and they did have resources that they didn’t. Angela was angry about it but she didn’t fight, a good thing, and Mary knew why.

Angela had been in labor since they left her in the motel with her dog Gideon and Fiona. Mary was disinclined to do so especially upon learning she was a werewolf but Castiel vouched for her, claiming that she had taken care of Angela and could be trusted. It left Mary apprehensive that her friend was in labor and she was more worried about Sam and Dean.

It was on Mary’s mind the entire time she drove to meet the boys. It fueled her adrenaline to do this and make sure that Sam was there to see his child be born. It was on full alert as they found the spot and she clambered out. It was nerve wracking waiting and she almost shot Kesset when he emerged first.

It was the first time that she had met the Avian and he looked very young, roughly about Sam’s age but so intense. He looked like he was ready to rip apart someone with his bare hands and he would do it. He bore her no ill will for pulling a gun on him but he was wary of the Men of Letters. His hawk like eyes bore onto them and he assumed a stance that clearly said that he was no in a trusting mood.

They Men of Letters were surprised that Sam and Dean were working with Kesset. Apparently it didn’t seem to be the norm to working with supernatural creatures but there were exceptions. Kesset was one of them and even if they did try to hurt him, his shifting ability was quick but he was more intimidating with the wings that projected from his back. She saw that when Billie the Reaper showed up in the middle of the road.

“You shall not do anything of the sort.”

Mary thought Kesset was ballsy for standing up to a reaper. It wasn’t until later that Dean mentioned that Kesset had every right and that he was a captain of a royal guard. It was a lot to take in especially learning that her best friends was adopted royalty of the Egyptian pantheon and hence the bodyguard. It certainly was impressive when he stood up to the reaper after learning the details of what the boys did and insisted that the reaper was messing with things that would make her consequences inconsequential. Mary had no idea what that meant but the reaper seemed to respond to that.

It was motherly instinct and love that prompted her to be the Winchester that was taken. That was how it had to be. What surprised Mary was that Kesset said no to her as well. It surprised her since the Avian didn’t know her from Adam. There was no reason for him to put his life on the line for her or willfully defy a blood bond and yet he was. He stood between her and the reaper and said that the deal was null and void. Mary doubted it was that easy but the Avian would not be deterred.

“It’s okay.”

Mary recalled how the Avian looked at her. His reddish brown eyes looked at her with a piercing look that clearly said that it wasn’t. The emotions that flitted across his face surprised her. This being really cared for her as he cared for her boys. The way he held himself told her that he would fight for her as he fought for Sam and Dean and Angela. It was like seeing the male version of her friend and it touched her and made it easy for her to tell him to stand down, which he did with surprising and reluctant alacrity.

“This isn’t over, reaper. There will be hell to pay.”

Again it baffled Mary that the Avian was still asserting himself to the reaper on her behalf. He didn’t fight it though because she said not to help. She should have known though that it was to give Castiel time to get behind the reaper and kill her. She only knew about it when Kesset moved towards the angel after he broke down saying how much the Winchesters meant to him and how much her friend meant to him and patted him on the shoulder. They looked at each other in understanding what the other was feeling.

“As much as this… hamster wheel you run around in annoys us… you do matter to us. All of you. I owe Shifa’ much including my own life. And you all have become more than friends to us. You are family.”

It certainly was a humbling act and Mary was grateful for it from the angel and the Avian. It was one of those many things that she needed to get caught up on like her friend changing from what she knew then to what she knew now. She knew Angela had the ability to inspire loyalty by her actions and on occasion her words. That was a physical manifestation of people who followed even though she never asked because she touched their lives in the manner that she did. It was why Mary loved and stood by her friend.

Now they were at the motel and Sam was able to welcome his brand new baby daughter into the world. Angela had been in the middle of a contraction when they got there and immediately Sam tensed up and made like he was going to bust down the door. It took Fiona opening the door and welcoming Sam like he was coming in for coffee that kept things from getting out of hand. From there, she finished the wait with Dean, Kesset and Castiel in the room next door.

It was a couple hours later when the first wails of a newborn were heard. Well, Kesset heard them and said something in a language that had Dean tease him about his language. Castiel was nodding in approval and if it was happiness then it was something unusual to see. Either way, it was… It was something to be happy about and Mary was happy.

Standing there, watching her youngest son and her friend look down at their daughter, Mary was reminded of when her own boys were born and when they were babies. She knew what she wanted when they were born. And she knew that it was in the same vein for Angela and Sam… he was like an open book with his feelings when it came to Angela and now his daughter. For her…

Before this, Mary wasn’t sure how she was going to fit in. She had been brought back thirty years after her death, a time where she remembered Dean as a four year old and Sam was a six month old baby, to find her sons were grown up and the world had changed drastically. It was different and yet it was still the same. There were still plenty of nasty things out there both normal and supernatural; it was a pretty dangerous place. She knew what she had to do when her boys were babies. There was purpose there.

Now it seemed that there was purpose again. She could see a means of getting used to this world and living in it. It was in the room she was looking into. It was a tiny bundle of joy that was looking at her parents, unaware of the world she had been born into and her parents, her family, would do everything to keep it that way for as long as possible. Standing there, Mary made a decision. She knew that it wouldn’t make her friend happy but there was the possibility of understanding. It was something she could do, what she couldn’t do for her boys. She would work for a world for her granddaughter to grow up unafraid and not trapped in the life.

It was unrealistic to think that it would go completely away. After all her friend was half vampire and, according to Castiel, she was once a real angel and partially responsible for her being brought back to life. And that meant that baby had vampire blood in her veins and the fact that she was her friend’s daughter… What she would do… it would be to make things easier for that little girl, the light from the first light; the light that led her to her family.


	10. 12.10 Light's Sunder

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel is in a bind as he thinks about what to do regarding Lucifer's spawn along with his history with Ishim and Lily Sunder. He comes to a few conclusions after watching his charge and getting some 'Uncle Cas' time with baby Jess. Tag to Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets.

Living on earth was complicated. That was the truth as far as Castiel knew. And he knew from experience. Most would say that ever since he met the Winchesters it became complicated and it led to his rebellion. In all honest truth, the complication began the moment he took on his orders of becoming the guardian to the one person whom he never could say no to and the one who introduced complication to him. And yet it was because of that complication that he was wondering about what he was going to do if he found the spawn of Lucifer and its mother.

Tensions had been high enough since it seemed that Dean was angry at him for killing the reaper Billie and breaking the contract she had with the Winchesters. Castiel was well aware that there were things that had cosmic consequences. Having been involved in a few things like that, he had a pretty good idea but as he had told both Sam and Dean, he cared about them both. They meant a lot to him and he did have the selfish motive of making sure that the youngest Winchester had her father and uncle and he grandmother around. Because he loved her.

Castiel knew that his search was a source of tension with his charge whom he loved. The truth was that he was torn about it and what to do. And instead of taking a leaf out of her book and talking to her or anyone, he buried himself in his search for the Nephilim sired by Lucifer. It was then that he heard it after the lights started flickering. And when he heard the crying, he turned towards the source to find his charge holding the crying baby and looking at him with a wide eyed look as she soothed the baby to sobs as she said rather than asked, “An angel is in trouble.”

She was right just as he knew. The angel in trouble was Benjamin and Castiel knew that she was concerned. As much as she disliked his brothers in general, and he didn’t blame her, she still would reach out to give a hand. He could tell she wanted to go out there and help since she paced in that manner she would when she wanted to rush into a fight and was schooling herself not to. Sam was holding the baby and talking it through like it was nothing.

In the end, Sam and Dean accompanied him with their dogs to find out what happened to Benjamin, leaving Angela behind to take care of the baby. Castiel knew that it was hard but he knew that Angela wasn’t ready. Even though Sam’s blood had revitalized her after giving birth to the baby, he knew that she still was recovering. She was doing a good job hiding it from everyone but he could see and he doubted that she would appreciate him taking a peek. Certainly Sam wouldn’t and Castiel had seen the results of that several times over.

It was like that human expression Angela liked to use. It was a stroll down memory lane as Castiel was taken back to what he had done in 1901. For a brief moment, he thought how Angela would be laughing at the fact that his vessel was female. He recounted what had happened and it certainly was a shock to see Lily Sunder again.

It was a shock but not quite one since he was used to the fact that Angela was a lot older than Lily. The memory of what happened made him determined to leave Angela out of the picture as well as the baby. As he told Sam and Dean, Ishim didn’t trust or like humans. The other angels in his garrison didn’t understand how he became a guardian and he never really elaborated on his charge and they certainly were baffled when he showed no signs of grief when a charge died. Unfortunately it didn’t turn out that way.

Lily had wounded Ishim and Castiel decided to use his powers to fully heal his old friend. It seriously drained him and left him vulnerable to when Ishim beat him down. And that was after the truth came out. The truth was that Lily’s daughter was human. Ishim had killed a human child.

Castiel had felt anger when he learned that truth. It also caused some rather disturbing thoughts such as thinking about the child being Angela when she was four or the baby. He knew that he would do anything to protect the child of Sam Winchester and Angela. But he also felt the guilt of what he had been involved with the death of a child and the beating felt deserved.

The angel had forgotten though that his charge had a way of knowing and doing things. Lily had come in and started getting her revenge on Ishim. She knew her Enochian spells well and managed to push Ishim back but Castiel knew that she wouldn’t be able to hold them back for long and Ishim was one of the stronger warriors. And one of his fears happened right then and there.

It was a shock all right when Angela appeared much like an angel would before they lost their wings. And it wasn’t how she could do it with her spirit warrior talents. She was physically there and ready to fight. Castiel recognized the signs of her anger, the kind that said that she was, as Dean would say, pissed and it was because someone had hurt someone close to her. It wasn’t like when Sam had been badly hurt; that had been… Castiel never wanted to see her like that again. This expression wasn’t much better since it was a guarantee that someone was going to get hurt and more likely lose a limb.

As it turned out, it was support. Castiel had chances to witness his charge’s healer ability work. He knew that it was her most powerful attribute and one that she never exploited unless it was necessary and even then it was more along the lines of pure instinct. This time though it looked as if she could control it since she had extended her hand and he could see the outline of her tattoo glowing on the underside of her wrist. It allowed Ishim to be held long enough for him to kill him with the angel blade. But then there was the moment of truth.

Castiel wouldn’t have blamed the woman if she wanted to kill him. He was ready to pay for his sins even though he didn’t like the fact that he would be leaving his charge alone and in pain from the loss. He didn’t like the fact that he would be leaving the baby without another means of protection and that he would be hurting her. He didn’t tell Angela that he assumed guardianship of the little one even though Amitiel did the same.

“You have what you wanted. You have your revenge.”

Castiel thought his charge was being foolish since she got close enough to Lily and was actually touching her. It was always a tense time because there was the chance things could go wrong. But he knew her and trusted her and resisted the urge react in guardian fashion. He wouldn’t have been able to anyway but he would do as Dean would and go down swinging.

“I know how you feel. I’ve been down the road of revenge many times because of loss.”

Castiel knew that all too well. He had come to her and had questioned some of her activities when he first started getting to know her. He had seen her motivation when backed by anger. She had gone down that road and could have not come back but she did. Before taking the final step, she always stepped back.

“You got your man. Now it is time to let go. They were under the impression of something else. I know that it isn’t a good excuse but…”

Castiel watched as Angela stepped close to Lily and spoke to her. He was ready to pay penance but as always, she stepped in to save him. She protected him and was willing to defend him no matter what. And whatever she said, it worked. Lily looked sadly at Angela and they shared a look that told Castiel it was one of those mysterious things that not even Dean could explain. It was startling to see Angela take the woman by the face and kiss her forehead gently before pressing her forehead to the same spot.

It certainly allowed for Castiel to walk away from the potential of getting stuck with a blade that night. It certainly was moot after Sam and Dean rounded on Angela asking what she was doing there and if the baby was okay. Castiel had to marvel that Angela handled it well since she was used to fending off Winchesters that became jerks only because they cared. In fact, after the whole thing, she was the only one acting like everything was normal.

“She wants to see you.”

Castiel looked up from his musings to see Angela standing there, holding the baby as the infant reached towards him. He looked up a little confused but reached for the baby anyway since he disliked it when she cried. He watched as Angela pulled up a chair to sit next to him like she was going to share in the beer that he had been nursing since Sam and Dean left. “Where are…?”

“Dean is taking care of my car and I sent Sam to his room,” Angela replied with a smile. “Jess wanted to see her favorite angel.”

“Hey!”

Castiel watched as Angela laughed at Gabriel’s outburst. He heard Jess coo and pull at his tie. He looked down at her and saw the hazel green eyes and noticed the gold flecks that danced in them. She was a healthy baby and for all intents and purposes were human but that could change as she got older. She could be like her mother and it was already evident that she was sensitive to the supernatural since she cried when Benjamin called for help. It didn’t matter though. Jess was the daughter of a Halfling and the one who had set Lucifer free and started the Apocalypse. By that principle she would be earmarked for death.

“I know you’re in a tough spot Cas,” Angela said, not looking at the angel. “After all according to you, Nephilim are dangerous.”

“They are forbidden… At least it was in the beginning,” Castiel replied as he turned his attention to the baby since she was insistent on playing with his tie.

“And I get that but I really don’t see how it is so. I mean… look at me. Look at Aaron… Jess.” Angela looked at Castiel with a pointed look that was gentle.

Castiel looked at her. He knew that she knew what things were to be; she knew the rules as it were and some she upheld because she knew that it was futile to mess with like the natural order of things. So he knew that she was worried about the blood contract that he had broken but she wasn’t going to get up in arms about it. It was as she said and that she was in no position to judge. But Castiel thought that was nonsense since she had every right. He knew though that she was trying to get a point across. “I know. And… that is why I… I don’t know what I am going to do.”

“Well you said that you want to find a better way.”

“And what do you suggest?”

“Probably the same I did when I found all of Azazel’s special children and threw a monkey wrench in the works.”

Castiel looked at his charge as she stared back. He was used to her flippant tone but he also knew that she was being serious by watching her body language. He frowned a little and asked, “What did you do?”

“I found them and hid them. Some I managed to get protection on and they didn’t know it.” Angela sat back in her chair and wrapped her arms around her shoulders before shrugging them. “I just… let them be to make their own choices. Mostly it has worked out. The ones that didn’t… I have to live with.”

“You take too much on yourself.”

“It’s called being human.”

Castiel turned to look at Angela as she gave him a wry smile. He thought about it a little and then nodded. “Perhaps you are right.”

Angela sighed and put a hand on the angel’s back, “I’m only telling you what I did. Ultimately it is going to come down to what you are going to do. And… it’s kind of why I like being as human as possible. I don’t know what’s going to happen and if it were me, I wouldn’t know until I was faced with it. Sometimes that’s all we can do and just hope that we make the right one.”

Castiel blinked at that as he watched Angela get up from her chair but not take the baby. He frowned at her but realized she was heading towards the kitchen. He then sensed that the little one was starting to get hungry. At the moment though she was staring up at him and playing with his tie like it was the only toy she had. She gave a particularly hard yank and the angel made a slight noise in his throat and said, “Please desist.”

The baby didn’t listen and tugged again while taking her other hand and gently touching his hand as he tried to loosen her grip. Castiel looked at the little hand splayed on his and then at the baby staring at him with an expression similar to her mother. It had him curious and worried since it meant that if they weren’t careful…

Staring at the baby, Castiel realized something. He knew that he was going to have to make some choices if and when he found Lucifer’s spawn and its mother. Sam was right to point out that in the end it was still a mother and child and after learning what Ishim had done so long ago… He wondered how his charge was able to wake up each day and keep going knowing that a choice like this was down the road. The responsibility as Malachi was enormous and while he thought he had grasped that in the beginning, he really didn’t. He still didn’t but he did know that his charge had something special within and it showed in how she treated others, the unconditional love she gave even to those that didn’t deserve it. That was what his father was about.

Looking at Jess, Castiel made his decision. He would do as his charge had done and weigh his options. There was more to a situation; not everything was black and white. If he had truly felt that way, he would have terminated his guardianship and he wouldn’t have come during the times where she needed it but never thought to call. It was an unknown road ahead and he could only hope that the way he wanted it to go down would be a good one. After all he was protecting a child that was similar in most respects.

He moved his hand and felt her fingers wrap around his large one. He murmured in a low voice, “You may have blood from a possibly forbidden union but you were made with love and… you will always be safe. I’ll make sure of it.”


	11. 12.11 Light's Regard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean reflects upon what happened and why he'd rather keep the good, the bad and the ugly. Tag to Regarding Dean.

_My name is Dean Winchester. My brother’s name is Sam Winchester. My mother’s name is Mary Winchester. My best friend is an angel named Cas. My brother’s wife and my best girl is Angela de Medici and they have a daughter…_

Those are the important things. My family. And I came close to losing all memory of them.

My name is Dean Winchester. I couldn’t even remember that. How could anyone forget their name sans the whole amnesia crap? I did and I ended up forgetting the most important people in the world to me. And it was all because of some witch.

I hate witches. And before you start, I don’t count my Hale in that. She is different. She’s not like those witch bitches who hurt good people. She tries to help them and using her powers. Plus it’s a bit exciting when we… you know. Anyway, it was a witch that did this to me and I ended up ganking him and his two siblings.

It didn’t reverse the hex but it did give us a chance ad for Rowena to lift the curse. I’ll admit that she came through for us though in reversing the spell. Though I think it had more to do with the fact she got revenge on the witches since that is who she is. And if I were some semblance of myself, I would have demanded for Hale and I would have called Kess, Cas, whoever to get her there. I have no doubt that Hale’s Celtic juju thing would top Rowena. At least Sam knows how to handle that pistol.

In the end, I’m glad I have my memory back since living without remembering the things that matter the most…It isn’t worth living. That certainly was made clear when we got home. The first thing I did was go and give Angie a hug and a kiss (brotherly mind you) and leave her surprised to go see little Jess. I just had to see her.

I know Jess is Sam and Angie’s kid and I tell ya the three of them together you can slap on a Hallmark card or something. But when I saw that tiny little mass of wrinkles (actually she was adorable), I just… She was and is a bundle of light and I think at that moment I understood what Sam meant about the light at the end of the tunnel. I don’t know for sure but I’ll be damned if anything, human or nonhuman hurt her. I know Angie and Sam would go ape shit but they aren’t alone. I’m not stupid since I know Cas and Kess and of course the hell mutts will go to town.

Anyway… seeing Jess and I couldn’t contemplate not knowing her and everything that happened that came to her to be. It sort of happened to Sam and that whole mess with Becky Rosen. I know it had to irk Sam since it made it seem like Angie never existed since he looked at me like I was crazy but I think the one who understands the most is Angie.

To this day, she still doesn’t remember everything that happened when she was made into mini Angie. There are a few choice memories but they aren’t what you think. It wasn’t voluntary like when she asked those Romani folks to remove her memories way back when so it was different. She lost two to three months of her life and yet she carried on like it was nothing but I know that it had to bother her. She’s just that way with the whole not showing people even though that is hard with Sam around since those two have a thing that is just crazy.

Actually it is not so crazy. It’s damn useful at times and… It is another reminder of why I said what I said to Sam about the memory spell thing. I mean, there are a lot of things that I would rather forget. I want to forget the crap that had happened the last few years. The whole thing with the Mark of Cane… the earlier stuff, being a demon… the blood… I want to forget it. I mean that is a lot of baggage to carry and in all honesty I have no right to complain since Angie suffered more and she still is the better person.

It did seem like a godsend but if it means that it wipes out the good things in my life, then I don’t want any part of it. What good is it worth if the things that you keep fighting for are gone, that you have no idea who or what they are?

_Dean?_

I can say one thing definitely. I can always count on Angie to find me or Sam and talk to us about what is going on. On a cynical note, yeah she could because at some point in her long life she came across a similar situation. I know she’s been to hell and was tortured and one of those times she suffered alongside Sam. That’s the more obvious. On the other hand, she has that experience and offers it if we ask and pushes when it merits it. For the most part, she talks to us and lets us do the talking and it has a way of working out.

_Life is the sum all things: the good, the bad and the ugly._

After everything and just standing there, looking at Jess in her crib with her mother, I know that Angie is right. As much as it sucks that I remember all the bad things that have happened and the things that I’ve done… I’m glad I still have it because… maybe Rowena was right in saying that everything I’ve done was for this greater good crap. I mean it doesn’t make it better though for some it might but I get what Angie has been telling me and Sam for a long time and the why she does things the way she does. Also those things had a motivation behind them and they are pretty selfish since Sam and Angie, family are the motivation but also I am saving people and if I forgot the crap then I’d forget the motivation.

I think I now understand what Angie meant about looking at everything and then making the best choice possible. There are things that I’m going to have to do and some of it I’m not gonna like but… I keep in mind what I fight for and it’s staring up at me with Sam’s eyes and it it’s Sam, Angie, my best friend Cas, Mom… and everyone that is a friend and claims friendship. This experience isn’t going to go away but I guess it can affect how I do things. I’m not saying that I’m going to be perfect from here on out since that is stupid but I can try to understand more about what I do and the why.

And riding Larry was pretty awesome.


	12. 12.12 Light Stuck in the Middle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Crowley has a thing for his 'sweetheart' Angie. So he does help out when they stumble onto Ramiel instead of garden variety demon. In the end it seems like its the devil you know. Tag to I'm Stuck in the Middle (With You).

_You idiots! You’re all going to die._

Crowley wasn’t kidding when he came to find the moose and squirrel with Mother Winchester and his sort of favorite angel holed up in a barn. Though he couldn’t quite say the same for his sweetheart, whom he was surprised to see since he knew that she was the kind that stuck close to what was hers aka the little rugrat that was also Sam Winchester’s kid. Yes, he knew since it wasn’t that hard to figure out.

It was more surprising when his sweetheart marched over towards him and gave him a slap. He had been slapped by her twice before but it still surprised him that she would be so… female about it. He couldn’t help but demand, “What the bloody hell is it with you slapping me?”

Crowley had known about Angela for a long time. Long before he formally introduced himself to the Winchesters, he met her when she sought him out on the nature of deals. From day one, he knew that she was a force to be reckoned with even if she had the most annoying habit of putting her life on the line for all the bags of puss she’d met and had yet to meet and especially for the brothers Winchester. And the deal was made sweeter when a little birdie told him that there was more to her in a celestial sense when Amara came into the picture.

As a demon, he would have done everything to go after her. After all even the lowly rats that serve him could _feel_ how valuable she was though they would just try to kill her. He though was a businessman. He saw the world as it functioned and that in order to make things run smoothly you had to, pardon the phrase, deal with the devil. In this case, it had to occasionally keep up pressure but for the most part leave her alone since the effects could be devastating. She was more useful alive than dead and he learned the hard way what happened when she was angry beyond all reason.

It was never far from his mind how she almost dissolved him into oblivion. Though he was certain that would make his mother happy. It had been a mistake on his end and Sam was the one that got hurt, severely enough to suffer in agony and that was after he may have found out too late that she was tied to Dean because of the Mark. And he may have had a hand in killing someone that had been a friend. In the end, she came after him with the intent to kill in seek and destroy mode and she did it to anyone she perceived was contrary to her goal. He was still reeling from the damage control of Hell since she pursued him there. If it hadn’t been for Dean and that cute little thing of an angel Castiel… it would have been like Hell never existed.

So Crowley was intent on keeping Angela on her good side with the occasional bits of annoyance. Which was why he gave strict orders to leave the new Mama Winchester and her rugrat alone. Of course there would be bound to be ambitious ones and he was perfectly content to let her deal with them. Just as he was somewhat content to let her deal with Ramiel but not completely.

Crowley had been in the business of making a deal six years ago when he brought the Lance of Michael and the Colt to the Prince of Hell. He also was kind of in the mindset of seeing what would happen if his sweetheart and Ramiel ever met in a fight. It certainly was one to speculate on since he had heard about Azazel and Lilith and she literally bossed Lucifer around and, as the rumor mill hinted, was currently bossing a prepubescent angel and a near immortal Librarian and still was standing up to God himself on occasion. It was a thing to think about. He never thought that the gifts he brought that resulted him being named King of Hell would come to this.

He had made a deal with Ramiel to make sure that no one disturbed him. Otherwise there would be hell to pay. Knowing Sam and Dean, they probably had no clue who it was until they knocked on the door. He was seeing the surprised look on all their faces as he told them about Ramiel. He also recognized that look in his sweetheart’s eye. Of course the name would be familiar but he doubted they ever met since it was Azazel that led her on her path to being a prisoner of hell. And it was his story that earned him a second slap.

“Bloody hell, will you stop slapping me?”

“No. Since you’re not worthy of a punch.”

When put like that Crowley had to be masochist and tease, “Well then, I guess I’ll keep my standards if you put it like that.”

It was fun and a nice commitment to memory the glare she shot at him before turning her attention back to Castiel. He wanted to scold her that her powers wouldn’t work though he got the impression she knew that and was trying anyway. He would never fully understand that but it was something to think about as he turned his attention to Dean as the squirrel demanded that he help or leave.

Crowley wasn’t sentimental but he knew the meaning of benefit. Yes he told Castiel that he didn’t care that the Hardy boys were being kept in some government facility and he went so far as to tease the angel about his sweetheart driving everyone crazy with her hormones, but he sort of did. But only in the investment sense. That was why he was out here in the cold night air trying to intercept and make Ramiel see some sort of reason. Of course it wasn’t easy when the bastard said that he had not one but two angels to hunt.

“I admit they don’t sound like much but every Armageddon, every bloody ‘this is the end of all things,’ the Winchesters have stopped it along with the Malachi. Like it or not, they’re an asset we can’t afford to lose.”

That was sounds reasoning he laid. And it was like he said: he didn’t have friends or make them. He made deals and even he knew that every kingdom needed allies. That’s what the Hardy boys were to him as well as his sweetheart. They were allies since they got it despite the persistent threats and near deaths he almost had at their hands. She was the only one that came close and deliberately missed.

“So you have the Malachi? Interesting.”

That should have been a warning but Crowley didn’t take it. Instead, he found himself flying through a barn wall. The blow stunned him but he was awake enough to see that the Winchesters were attempting to hold Ramiel with holy fire. Very clever and would have worked if the demon in question didn’t have a few tricks up his sleeve.

Crowley was not one to get his hands dirty if he could help it. Yes, he did have to with the whole Purgatory thing and then the thing with Amara but for the most part, he preferred to watch and see what would happen. And watch he did and he was reminded why she was his sweetheart despite the repeated attempts of her saying otherwise.

The fact that she wasn’t blown back by Ramiel’s power spoke volumes of increased strength and ability. She looked like a goddess as the wind rippled her hair as she stood there clenching her blade in one hand and that chakram in the other. Ramiel had the lance and it looked like Crowley was going to see his what if after all.

She moved fast and it was a blur but Crowley didn’t miss the fact that he could see the faint outlines of wings. That was new. The blood smeared on her forehead… little grotesque in his opinion but she did look good in war paint. She moved like she had never had been pregnant, no hints of slowly down or anything that indicated someone getting back into shape as she moved to counter the lance. Sparks flew when Absolution and the lance collided. Made sense since they were both weapons that had celestial creation within them.

It felt spoiled when it was Sam that drove the lance through Ramiel. But if he admit it, the moose did fairly well and in a creative way. Crowley wasn’t blind that Sam and Angela were meant to be together and how they worked together. That annoying thing they did of talking without talking… a bloody nightmare and quite useful at times. It had him curious about what it was since it was a bond not unlike what she had with Castiel since he did see her hissing in pain from the angel’s agony of being stabbed by the lance and a few choice other things. And yet it was useful here.

Angela was on the offense and defense… he could never bloody hell keep track. She was swinging her blade to block and counter. It was then that Sam managed to get a hold of the lance. It was beautiful as she moved in, rolled against Ramiel and then Sam followed through with a stab. And he was right in that demons go bye-bye in a puff of smoke. But that wasn’t the half of it.

As he told Ramiel, Crowley didn’t have any friends. He made deals and yet seeing Castiel starting to go through the final stages and his sweetheart doing everything she could to slow it down… He really couldn’t claim that as the entire truth. He really, _really_ couldn’t understand why she was persisting. Her hands were glowing and those tattoos were on full throttle including the bloody ones she drew on her forearms and she was fighting a losing battle. He was a sook for certain when it came to her. In truth though he didn’t want her to come after him if something happened to the angel.

It was then he remembered that conversation when he first gave the lance to Ramiel. Of course that was the answer. At least he thought it was and he knew enough about spellwork to know that it was all in how you wrote the charm work. He did toy with the possibility of letting the angel die but he was rather fond of his skin. So he broke the damn thing and didn’t look back and everything was how it was supposed to be. That is until he found out that the Colt was missing.

He was in the middle of a search party when he felt the tug at his navel. Oh bloody hell he was being summoned. And with his luck, it was in the middle of a devil’s trap. Unless it was a crossroads deal but he didn’t really do much of that any more unless it was special circumstances like trying to get the moose and squirrel to stop trying to close the gates of hell. Still he had to obey the summons even though he was powerful enough not to. So he went and found himself out at a crossroads.

“Thought it was appropriate considering all things.”

Crowley turned to see none other than his sweetheart. Cleaned up of course but she was there and the beautiful specimen she was. He replied, “Just like old times. Right sweetheart?”

The slap was expected and Crowley put a hand to his cheek and retorted, “Bloody hell woman.”

“I am not your sweetheart,” Angela replied with a coy smile as she stood there with her arms crossed over her chest.

Crowley straightened up and dusted himself off. He tried to look dignified as he asked, “So where are the moose and squirrel? Reconnoiter?”

“They’re at the room,” Angela offered with a shrug. “I’m alone. Well… not completely alone.”

Crowley heard the growl and emerged two Wilder pups. He looked at them with a disgusted and wary look and then up at her. “You think I’m going to try something? After everything we’ve been through?”

“Considering that the time before Amara I wanted to utterly destroy you for what you did to Sam and Kieran…” Angela shrugged her shoulders. “Besides, I’m never alone when I travel. Much like you always had a stoolie on call.”

“Touché love,” Crowley conceded. He straightened up and decided to make the whole thing professional. They were civilized after all. “So what do I owe the pleasure of being summoned by the Malachi of Absolution? How is the rugrat by the way?”

“None of your business on the latter,” Angela replied. She had her eyes narrowed at the demon. “As to the former, it is a business transaction.”

Crowley narrowed his eyes warily. This was a new development. And since he had taught her how to make and break deals like a demon would… “What kind of transaction are you hinting at?”

“The kind that we work together but we both get what we want kind.” Angela looked at him and said, “I know that you gave Ramiel the Colt.”

“No.”

“You did. I figured it out after you gave your little story. Knowing you, you would do something to make sure that the one sure fire way of killing everything except five things on earth was locked away. Plus I remember how you said we shouldn’t have been aware of its existence.”

Crowley had to hand it to her. Once again he underestimated how her mind worked. He grinned, “Well then is this a partnership to find it?”

“I have suspicions of who.”

“Kiss and tell.”

“Only if you do what I say and you can go back to playing with that dog that tormented me in the cage.”

Crowley knew that he was getting into something that may not prove to be the best deal for him but the benefit was that whatever was going on was something that really bothered her to come to him and not to her two champions. “I’m not going to ask how you know since you’ll probably start on something that involves scrying or…”

“I smelled him on you.”

“Stop doing that!”

“Perks.”

Crowley scowled at her, “Alright fine. What do you want?”

“I need you to find out what you can about Mr. Ketch. British Men of Letters.”

Crowley saw the light somewhere. It was faint but it was there. So his sweetheart didn’t like them. Now that was something. Maybe it would work to his advantage. “Alright. Kiss and tell.”


	13. 12.13 Light's Feud

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angie has met a lot of people in her lifetime and there was love and hate there. And there is extreme hatred for the British Men of Letters. Sam finds out after Mary revealed that she has been working with them. Tag to Family Feud.

Dealing with anger issues is a complex or rather tricky situation when you’re a hunter. For Dean, looking for a fight or hunting something and shooting it was relief. Sam liked to go for a run. It made him tired and by that time the anger was gone. Angela… that depended on how angry she was and Sam had a pretty good idea when he heard loud banging in the dungeon area of the bunker as he went down to try and tempt his love with something to temper her mood. Keiko, his Wilder hound, dared to brave the trek when her sibling Shadow cowered under the table next to Dean’s feet. It had been comical but a good indicator of what to expect. Sam was just glad that the bedroom was soundproof via magic and sigils since he didn’t want the baby to wake up.

He found what he was looking for in a corner that was the shooting range. Yep, the bunker had a shooting range and what he found was target practice but in a most unusual way. He paused as he watched her look at a box of clay pigeons with a look of disdain and sent two flying. She let them fly until she flung her chakram at one and seized the other with her powers and slammed it hard into the wall, shattering it so there was no way to tell which piece fit where. A third came and she shot it. Yeah, she was pissed.

Sam waited until she lowered the gun before clearing his throat and trying to make a joke, “I think you got that one.”

Angela paused in what she was doing and gave a slight smile before looking at the clay pigeons and sent one flying with all the strength she could muster into the back wall. It hit so hard that it chipped a good size piece off the wall even though the pigeon shattered like the others. “Just trying to keep focus while giving a good scream.”

Sam watched as she summoned her chakram while two more pigeons flew and she pulled out her pistol and shot them, one from the hip and the other from a standard position. He replied, “So you’re still mad at Mom.”

Angela paused in what she was doing and turned to look at Sam. She replied, “Mad is when I give you and Dean icy glares or the cold shoulder. I’m livid.”

Sam could see and understand that. “You know she’s doing what she thinks is right. That is what you… endorse.”

“I endorse freedom of choice but I don’t endorse stupidity.”

Sam should have seen that one coming. He married the queen of semantics. This was the woman that promised not to poke at the cage so she went in with him and poked the bear while in the cage. “I know. You threatened me and Dean about stupidity more than once.”

“Still do,” came the reply with a slight smirk indicating that when that happened it was all in fun. The expression sobered as Angela took a breath and leaned against the counter. “Is it possible to be mad at your mom’s endorsement while still loving her?”

Sam shrugged at that, “Yeah.” He knew it wasn’t a rhetorical question. She was just trying to reason out why his mother, her best friend decided to work with the British Men of Letters and keep it a secret from them. That is until she just told them.

The burgers and beer was just a means of softening them up. Sam and Dean had been on the receiving end of that kind of thing several times with Angela and occasionally they used it on her. But the bombshell was that Mary Winchester was working with the British Men of Letters. The same guys that tortured Sam and left her comatose while she was pregnant. Since they were rescued, Sam had suspicions that Angela knew more about the Brits than she let on and it was a history that didn’t end well given that when Mary revealed her secret, one of the beer bottles shattered like that.

Sam and Dean made apologies and pretended it was an accident but they knew that Angela had been pissed off by that revelation and it didn’t help that she was emotionally high stung from the sad/happy ending of Gavin and his love. And that was in part because she was the one that read the spell needed to send Gavin back to his own time and because Sam explained what had happened with the locket and the ghost tied to it.

Sam knew that Angela loved Mary and had a relationship with his mom that neither he nor Dean could understand. The best he could come up with was like sisters. It certainly explained why Samuel never liked her and tried to kill her a couple of times. Well one time with him and Dean around. The other times… it rankled. So he could understand to a degree. It wasn’t too much different from when Dean tricked him and lied to him about Gadreel and the Amy Pond thing…

Sam looked at his wife as she stared at nothing in particular, leaning against the counter. He noticed her hand went up to where the necklace he had given to her on her birthday was and she picked up the star and rubbed it between her fingers. She really was in thought since she only did that when she was thinking or worried and figured that maybe it was a little bit of both in this case. He chanced it and took a couple of steps forward. “You can be mad at someone for something they did and still love them.”

“I know.”

Sam watched her as she tucked her head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around her to hold and hug her. This was now or never. “Why are you so angry with the Brits? I mean I know but…”

Sam expected a long pause but was caught off guard when she answered him readily, “Because they are a loveless bunch of sons of bitches.”

Sam straightened up and looked at her. She had straightened up and looked at him with a completely unapologetic look. It was vaguely similar to how she used to look at him and Dean when they first met; making no apologies for calling it like it was even if it pissed them off. It only confirmed his suspicions from what he observed and that wasn’t attributed to pregnancy hormones. “Wow.”

“Don’t get me wrong, not all Brits and folks on the other side of the pond are like that,” Angela corrected, “If they were, then I wouldn’t be friends with Mac and his family and bunch of choice others. Fi, Liam…”

“I get your point,” Sam interceded before she started rambling to throw his scent off. He noticed how she seemed to wrap her arms around herself as if she were trying to protect herself. He ventured, “What did they do to you?”

“Not just me. But others.” Angela looked at Sam after taking a couple of breaths and relaxing her arms. “What they said about knowing when a fugly comes along… pretty much true. And they always shoot first and no questions at all.” She pursed her lips as she stared at Sam.

“They tried to kill you.”

“More than once and executed a family I was escorting out to Scotland where they wanted to live in peace.” Angela straightened up sighed almost wearily.

Sam knew that her past had some pretty nasty going ons. It was hard to hear about her previous encounters with Ruby, Cary, other demons and things and nearly being killed by well-meaning hunters that didn’t know any better. No doubt she set the record straight since she was still here. But the source of her downright hatred of the British Men of Letters… it was deeply personal and that was a rarity since she always acted with the larger picture in mind. His throat convulsed slightly as he asked, “Can you… explain a little?”

Angela looked at Sam. Her eyes became firm as she spoke, “They tried to kill me and each time I evaded or kicked their retainer hunters’ collective asses. It wasn’t until some genius decided to get in touch with the Illuminati and actually read the damn history books. By then they already killed the family I was protecting. Mother, father, three children.” She looked away before looking back at him. “I don’t trust them and doubt they ever changed. Torturing you… proof of that.”

Sam say the burning look of anger start to ignite. Whatever happened between her and the Brits was obviously a sore spot. And of course she had been pissed when that British bitch did what she did to him. He put a hand on her shoulder to calm her down so she wouldn’t start doing anything that would produce questionable cracks in the foundation. She was strong enough for that. “I get that you don’t trust them but… what about Mom?”

Angela was quiet for a couple of minutes and Sam watched her relax a little. Finally she answered, “I’ve literally seen Death, faced death, died and come out from the other side. Coming back… you can’t go back to the way things were. You’re different. It’s been that way for me, you… Dean. Now Mary… I know it’s her but…” She made a slight face and did a shake of her head with a shoulder shrug. “It’s why I told her to do what she thinks is right.”

“Okay.” Sam was okay with that answer. He knew that she still loved his mom. She just couldn’t understand why she chose that route.

“I trust your mother when it comes to a hunt but anything involving their sales pitch…” Angela’s face contorted in reluctance as she added, “Handle with care.”

Sam remembered that all too well when she used to say that with such frequency. She was saying that if they wanted to hear it out, they could but consider what they were proposing. “You think it’s that bad,” he said more than asked.

“There’s a family plot in Westminster Abbey that says so,” Angela replied. “Luckily I was friends with the caretakers there.” She looked down and sighed, “Sam, if you and Dean talk to them, wait until I get Jess to the cabin.”

Sam knew she was serious when she mentioned her sanctuary and Jess in the same sentence. It also sent a warning down his spine. She was angry but also fearful and would do anything to protect their baby including not letting them know where she was. It made his protective instincts start to flare in conjunction with hers. It never mattered who was more protective and it didn’t bother him that he started doing a few things that vamps did which included sniffing near her neck and the nuzzling affection and a few other things. He used it to his advantage as needed. Right now, she was concerned about Jess’ safety and it was telling him to act on it. He nodded, “I will. Make sure Gabe is up to speed on Angel Air.”

“Why do you think he complained about me these last few months and before Jess was born?”

Sam felt his lip twitch slightly. She was always thinking three and sometimes more steps ahead. He once said that she had a backup for the backup plan. He understood now why she constantly did that. She lived a long life yes but there was always someone or something out there that tried to kill her or hurt her and she was just protecting herself while doing her job. “Back up for the back up.”

“Contingency is not a bad thing,” she replied with a slight smile. She put her hands on his chest and took a breath. “I trust you and Dean above all else with my life and with Jess. Yes, I trust Mary but…”

Sam put a finger on her mouth. She didn’t have to say it. Instead he pulled her into one of his bear hugs and held on. He was going to have to have a serious and private discussion with Dean later over this but at the moment he was just doing what she needed and that was to comfort his mate. She needed it since he got the feeling that if and when they meet up with the Brits again… it could be the start of something that made the battle they witnessed back in the medieval ages look like a bitch slapping fest. And he would do anything and everything to keep her and their daughter safe.


	14. 12.14 Raiding of the Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam returns to the bunker to find that Angela and baby Jess have left to find sanctuary. Both have the same idea just different approaches. Tag to The Raid.

_You guys are changing the world and I want to be a part of that._

_If you and Dean talk to them, wait until I get Jess into the cabin…_

Sam looked around the empty room in the bunker. He stifled the urge to break down as his throat convulsed. The wardings were still in place but… she was gone. They both were and all that he had was a letter in his hand.

_Il mio cuore,_

_If you are reading this, then you know that I have made good on my vow. Jess and I have left the bunker and have gone to find sanctuary…_

It had been three days since he and Dean kicked their mom out after hearing that she had been lying to them about what she had been doing the past few months. Sam was ready to come back to the table and hear her talk and so was Angela. Dean wasn’t and he let it be known by being an ass about everything and then telling him to pick a side. Angela was upset too but at least she was willing to hear the woman out and she actually snapped at Dean and called him an ass. Then he got the text.

Mom decided to show him what the British Men of Letters were all about and invited him to their compound. The invitation was extended to Angela but she refused. In all honesty, Sam didn’t blame her. She had been burned and was very distrusting of them and, if he were completely honest, she didn’t want to leave their baby vulnerable. True Gabriel and Sherlock would have blown the bunker up to cover their escape to get the baby out but this was a mother, a very powerful mother, who sensed danger was taking precautions. So he went alone.

_I explained my thoughts about the British Men of Letters and I know you have firsthand experience, but I won’t tell you what to do. You know that isn’t me. But I won’t go near them unless there is a very compelling reason…_

It was compelling when the vampire nest that they were going to go after changed course and came after them. Sam had been baffled at the sheer ineptitude of Mick and his staff. He knew that Angela would have called them a bunch of librarians or something to mock the fact that they didn’t know a damn thing. And they weren’t prepared for the fact that the alpha vamp or rather one of the alphas was there with them.

It was never for dramatic effect when Angela went into full on predator/hunter mode. It was hunting down to the purest form. In his mind, and he had seen it, she was a skilled hunter, the perfect hunter. And that was coupled by the fact that she was going on instinct to protect him, her mate as he would do for her. And she certainly made it known when she tripped the lights and security and made her move and that was after she had gotten there like it was nothing. Sam suspected Gabriel had a hand in that and he was grateful.

Sam suspected that Angela was making a point to Mary and the British Men of Letters when she appeared like she did completely vamped out meaning the teeth and the eyes were glowing. If he squinted, he could see the faint outline of the wings that indicated her heritage of being an angel. She was powerful but never at one time did she completely show the full extent, except for maybe when she went on a rampage to kill Crowley after what happened to him. Whatever it was, it bought him time to get the Colt and get it ready.

“Ah Angela, the favored daughter of Isis, the dhampir that hunts her own kind. I never thought I’d see you again.”

“Well you know the whole thing about our kind. We protect our mates viciously.”

“Indeed.”

_I won’t lie in that the motive is a good one. Hell, even I know the road to perdition is paved with best intentions. I once believed in them and helped them since they are incompetent. The Illuminati were better…_

It was providence that Mick managed to cast the spell on the bullets to make them work with the Colt and some slyness to pass one onto him. Angela seemed to know which was why she didn’t put herself in the line of fire but she kept the alpha vamp busy talking. It was an old trick and one that she perfected and helped him and Dean perfect and that was to make your target believe one thing while executing another.

It worked and he killed the alpha vamp. The traitorous hunter was caught and dealt with but Sam knew that not everything was all right. He had watched as Angela moved to stand over the body of the alpha and stare at him. She said something but he didn’t know what. He did get the feeling though that she was making a promise of some sort or saying that she was sorry. It could have been either or both and it was worrisome but there was no time to find an explanation.

_Sam… talk to your mom. I’m not one to judge with everything I’ve done but… she has her reasons. I may not understand it but I still love her…_

Dean had come with Ketch to help out. It was a bit of an awkward conversation since he had written that he had gone out and would be back later and Dean said he went out for a drink. Angela had left saying that she didn’t want to stay a minute longer in the company of oily worms and she had a date with laundry. Sam didn’t blame her and he had to admit she knew how to make an entrance and an exit by doing that thing that Castiel used to do and he prayed thanks to Gabriel.

The upside was Dean and Mom were talking again. Sam had to admit that it was a trip down memory lane when things were tense between him and Dean after he started the Apocalypse. It was also then that he made his decision and went to let Mick know that he was in. On his mind were the two most important people in his life next to his brother and it was why that he said he was in. He just didn’t expect the result when he got home.

_I know you mean well Sam. You’ve always had best interests at heart and I know that it why you did what you thought was right especially for Jess, our baby._

_I know you want me to join and help but… I can’t…_

It had been too quiet when they got home. Even Sherlock was quiet and it had Sam think the worst case scenario. He was calm though and searched, in particular their rooms. That was where he found the letter and everything looking like it always did and that was spick and span clean. He clamped down his fears and opened the letter as he searched the room.

_I believe in creating a better world; it is a noble goal. Because of that, I will continue to fight to make a better world for our daughter, but I will not be a part of something that is the equivalent of mass extinction. You might as well kill me yourself and if you can do it, kill our daughter._

Sam searched the closets and found that most of the clothes but some were still there. That had to mean she intended coming back. He wouldn’t know what he would do if he couldn’t see her or their daughter again. And it wasn’t like he was going to call her out on kidnapping. That would just make her a target and he knew that she didn’t kidnap her daughter for malicious purposes. Still it produced a throb in his heart.

_I don’t mean to hurt you Sam but I don’t know what else to do. I just want her to be safe…_

Sam wanted their daughter safe too and he felt like he had missed something important by the way Angela had been acting when the British Men of Letters came back on the scene. It made him feel like he let his wife down by siding with them. He thought this was a better way though.

_I don’t agree with your decision but I am always on your side. I will always fight for you. You are my heart, my life. I won’t deny you seeing Jess but I feel more comfortable that our daughter is in a place that would put up a fight if worse comes to worst and contingency is not a bad thing…_

Sam sighed as he realized that this wasn’t total abandonment. She didn’t leave him. From a tactical standpoint, she was retreating to a place where she knew she had the advantage. It still didn’t stop the hurt from filtering through. That she couldn’t talk to him and at least come up with a plan… He knew he missed it.

She was sacred, plain and simple. She was scared of them and he was suspected that there was more to it than what she had told him about the family they killed in front of her. He had wanted to ask what more they had done but didn’t out of respect for her and he knew a few things about torture. She knew too and he wasn’t going to make her relive it if she didn’t have to.

_I am not going to specify where I am going. It’s for safety sake, but I won’t leave you out in the cold._

_I will continue the hunt and if you need help, I will help you but not them. If you need me… you know how to find me…_

Sam read the last part of her letter. She had signed it in her beautiful script and underneath wrote a phrase in her native tongue but it was in the Egyptian hieratic. He had to smile at that since she had been teaching him more on languages and how to play with them. He now knew what to do and it wasn’t like he hadn’t done it before. It gave him hope and he left their room to do what he needed to do.

The motel was unusual but it was in the right place. Sam had practiced enough to be able to track her and it was one of those things that he was certain the Brits didn’t know about. It did have him on alert since he assumed that she would head straight to where she knew Jess would be safe. He held his fear in check as he approached the door. He didn’t bother with the front desk since that would prove to be awkward and he didn’t have all the details.

Taking a breath, he knocked on the door. He had his gun tucked in his jacket as he waited. He heard the telltale clink of the locks being undone. He took a breath as the door opened to reveal the most beautiful woman he had ever known standing there. He felt relief pour through his body as he stared at her and she stared at him with a watery look in her eyes.

“Sam…”

Sam couldn’t help himself and he walked in and grabbed his wife in a tight hug. He pressed his nose to her neck to take in her scent as he held on. He knew that she hadn’t left him. It was just a relief to see that it was a reality. “Angie…”

A cooing and a whimper caught his attention and he pulled back to see the travel crib set up with his daughter in it, looking at him, reaching for him. He walked over to the crib and smiled at his daughter and bent to pick her up.

“She missed you,” Angela said.

Sam held his daughter as he turned to look at his wife. She was standing there with her hands folded in front of her with a pensive expression on her face. He knew that this wasn’t going to go away any time soon and that his decision affected them all. He swallowed slightly as his daughter cuddled into him. “Angie… I am only doing what I think is right.”

“I know, but I won’t help you help them. And I won’t make myself or Jess a target.”

“I don’t suppose me asking them to leave you alone would help.”

“Not really.”

Sam looked at his wife as she gave him a blunt and honest answer. “Angie, I want you and Jess to be safe. If you think…”

“Sam,” Angela held her hand up to stop him. “I am not asking and I won’t ask you to work favors or do the deep cover stuff I would do. You do what you have to do. Just… come home safe every night. That is all I ask.”

Sam looked at her. It became clear he had missed a few things. She was scared and needed to feel safe. He would give that to her. “I’ll always come home to you, Angie.” He took a couple of steps forward and reached out to caress her cheek before leaning in to press a kiss to her lips. “I love you. Always and forever.”

Sam knew that he would be in a tight spot and he was certain that Dean wouldn’t understand even if he did explain. He foresaw a few nights away from the bunker but it was worth it. He admitted he slept better at night by her side. Also if she was that scared of the Brits, he would investigate to find out more about them and what they did.

Mick asked him about getting Dean on board and he knew that would take time. Mitch also asked him about Angela. Deep down, Sam knew that it would take generous demonstrations of sincerity to convince her. He knew that it would be highly unlikely and he was more than likely setting himself up to crash and burn but… looking down at his daughter and at his wife… it was worth it.

_As long as they are here, I can’t stay at the bunker but there is always a place that can be sanctuary. You know how to find me…_


	15. 12.14 Crossroads

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seems there is more than meets the eye when it comes to Angela and her experiences with the BMOL. A one shot tag to The Raid where Angie reveals that she has ties that are more personal than most.

It was a cold night. It was cold enough to make your breath come out in hot puffs. It was fitting against the scenery of darkness by some abandoned rest stop near the side of the road in the middle of nowhere. It was also clichéd but Mick supposed that it was only natural considering who he was meeting that night as he shrugged his shoulders and dug his hands into his coat pocket.

As he waited some more, he pulled out his left to check his watch. He pursed his lips once he noted that he had been waiting there for at least an hour. He had been there an hour and there was no sign of who he was supposed to meet. Well, he supposed that was only natural but it was frustrating and downright rude in his opinion. He turned to walk back to where his vehicle was.

The crunch of gravel on the ground stopped Mick and he slowly turned to look over his shoulder. His eyes widened slightly when he saw his contact but they seemed almost to blend in with the night shadows. He cleared his throat and said, “You’re late.”

“No I’m not.”

“I’ve been waiting here a bloody hour.”

“Consider it precautions.”

Mick turned fully around. Since this meeting was going to happen anyway, he might as well make the most of it. It was the first break he had since he came to America to fix the mess that Toni started. He sighed, “I didn’t bring anyone else.”

“After waiting an hour I could see that.”

“So are we going to have a decent conversation or not… Angela?”

Angela came out of the shadows, her eyes flickering slightly from her use of power. “Oh I am always up for a decent conversation. The question is whether or not you are, Mick.” She looked at him with a piercing gaze. “Whether or not this was a ruse to get me to come out of hiding, track me and then kill me.”

Mick blinked at that. He knew she was blunt and had a healthy disdain for the Men of Letters from his side of the pond. She let it be known but in a regal and dignified way. When it was blunt that meant politeness was not in order. “I apologize if that was the idea conveyed when we first approached you…”

“It was the idea when your lot murdered an innocent family in front of me and tried to kill me,” Angela corrected with a dismissive wave.

Mick cleared his throat at that. He realized that trying to make light of the experience was not in the best interest. “I understand that,” he offered, “But I do want to thank you for coming to meet me.” He glanced around and continued, “Granted that this is… a little extreme.”

“Can’t be too careful and there is no way I am setting foot in your compound again.” Angela crossed her arms over her chest as she narrowed her eyes at Mick. She took a couple of breaths as she studied the man and continued, “Now, you said that you wanted to recruit me. The answer is no.”

“Hear me out.”

“I’ll hear you out as a friend, Mick,” Angela countered as she held up her hand to quiet him. “But not as one of their sales pitchmen.” She lowered her hand and added, “We go back, you me and Mac. I never understood and I sure as hell know that Mac was pissed that you joined them.”

Mick sighed at that. He looked down and shook his head slightly before explaining, “I am a legacy. You know how that works, Angela.”

“Oh I do. Sam and Dean are legacies through Henry Winchester,” Angela replied with a nod. She took a couple of steps forward to close the distance so it looked like a pair of friends were talking. “Believe me you have no idea how hard it was to explain that one when we moved into the bunker and I unlocked certain rooms without explanation.”

Mick chuckled at that, “No doubt you made it reasonable. It was always your best quality.”

Angela made a slight sound at that. “Please. The only reason I sound logical was a result of centuries of experiencing what everyone else has. I mean knowing the effects of demon blood to a body is not usual but handy.” She made a slight gesture as she shrugged as if it were no consequence. She sobered as she crossed her arms over her chest and got down to what the meeting was about, “So… apart from recruitment, why did you call me?”

“I had to see you again,” Mick answered readily and honestly, “And not how things stand between you and the Men of Letters, but as a friend. Mac… he answers my letters but…”

“Still seeing it as a betrayal huh?”

“I told you both, I’m a legacy.”

“I get it, Mick,” Angela replied holding her hand up in a gesture of reassurance. “I got over it. I’m not angry with you. I am angry with them,” she clarified. “Mac… you know where he is coming from and he will defend his homeland to the death against their plans.”

“I do,” Mick counted, “Which is why I have managed to convince the big boys to… focus elsewhere. I’m just sorry that it had to be where you live.” He lowered his face feeling every bit sorry for the way things were turning out.

“I’m sorry too,” Angela replied in a gentle tone though her expression indicated that she wasn’t happy at all with the situation. “I’m sorry that it came to the fact where I had to pack up myself and my daughter and leave my husband to find sanctuary.”

Mick looked at her. He remembered well the tense situation at the facility. The vampires and the alpha coming in and then her sudden appearance showing them all they really had little to no clue of what they were doing except for Sam and Mary Winchester. He didn’t know anything either. He was more of a bookman, knowing his spells but no practical expertise. He could blame it on his legacy status and the hierarchy that existed but that was weak. Mac and Angela would have called him out on it faster than anything. He also remembered the look that she gave Sam and that was right after the moment Sam said he was in.

Angela looked at Mick, studying him. She hadn’t seen the Brit in over a decade but she remembered him. It was always him, Mac and her when she was last in Europe. Mick was the librarian of sorts. He could research the spells and track things. She and Mac were more the muscle and each had different ways of doing it. But they always looked out for each other. She had been disappointed when he took up his position with the Men of Letters and Mac saw it as a betrayal. That was enough to make things tense and she never mentioned it to her Scottish friend.

Mick swallowed slightly and replied, “For what it is worth, I am sorry. I am sorry that you feel that way and… I wish I could give some assurance that she would be safe but I know that is not enough for you.”

“No it isn’t.” Angela breathed a sigh as she looked at Mick. “Because my home is a Men of Letters bunker. Tactically, your side has home advantage.”

It sounded cruel the way she put it in terms of tactics but Mick knew she was right. What was to stop the Men of Letters from going in and using her child against her? He had to admit that when he saw her in her condition when he put a stop to Toni’s activities, he was surprised and the manner in which Sam acted told him all he needed to know. Plus he noticed a few things that were certainties with vampires in general. He nodded in agreement, “That is correct. Perhaps it is better that you… seek sanctuary.”

“And that will not garner you an invitation.”

Mick sighed at that. He knew that she would never let him see her daughter in person as long as he was executing the agenda of the Men of Letters. It was a price he paid and it hurt. “I know, but… how is she?”

“She is fine.”

“I see.”

“Mick… as long as you are here…”

“I know,” Mick held his hand up to stop her. He knew this was affecting her as much as it was him and probably more. He believed her when she said what happened. He inquired and the response… it gave him every reason to believe her. “I just… I’m happy for you. And I promise that our plan won’t extend to you or to her.”

“And what about the others that are not me but just want to live in peace?” Angela poised the question as she shifted on her feet. She gave a slight chuckle as she continued, “Don’t get me wrong, you guys have a good idea but… that’s not how the world works and what you are doing… That is catastrophic in the consequences.”

“They told me that you would be melodramatic,” Mick countered, “But I know that you wouldn’t say anything unless it was significant.”

Angela nodded at that. At least Mick remembered a few things. “Indeed.” She shifted and stood like she was giving a presentation. “It wouldn’t surprise me if your lot didn’t study the Old Religion, the time before time. For scholars, you sure know nothing when it comes to the important things.” She smirked at that as she teased Mick. “That was clear with the alpha vamp.”

Mick cleared his throat at that. That was going to come back and haunt them. “Angela… this is for a world…”

“Without monsters, I know but hello.”

Mick watched as she gestured at herself. She had a point with this and he realized it. Of course the American hunters they recruited, they really didn’t know about her until they saw her in action. Or did they? Enough to bring them on board if she was with Sam and Dean? “You’re not a monster.”

“Last I looked, I was. According to your standards,” Angela replied with a slight mocking tone. She backed off at the contrite look Mick was getting and started again, “Mick, this is not going to be black and white. There are things that are older than what you know, that I know and it will not look good if you proceed.”

“Is that a threat?”

“No. A warning. You’re the librarian. You should be able to see for yourself that I am right.”

Mick looked away. This wasn’t turning out the way he intended but… at least they were talking. “But you could be lying.”

“And since when have I ever when fate of the world is in balance and all that?” Angela looked at the man with a pointed look. “I have never steered you wrong when it counted. I still don’t. I may not want anything to do with the Men of Letters but… we’re friends… if that means anything.”

Mick looked at the ground as he thought of what she had said. There were things she didn’t know about the plan that would make it work. His bosses were willing to leave her alone because they paid attention to what had been written about her. But she said there were things she knew that he didn’t… Maybe a tit for tat thing going on there but… She was right. She never lied to him when they spoke. “Say you’re right, why should we not try to rid the world like how we cleared out the vampires like we did?”

“Thought you would remember the lesson on ecosystems,” Angela offered in response. At his look, she continued, “Everything living, human and nonhuman, exists in a balance. Like an ecosystem with animals, we function the same way. Drastic changes… it can send it into shock. In this case, you got retaliation. But what bothers me is that you are not considering those that don’t attack humans. You want to know why Mac is pissed… there is the reason. And mine.”

Mick stared at his friend. She had laid it all out for him and explained it. She had a right to be concerned and he could see why she and Mac would be upset. But what they were doing, it was good work. “But we are doing good work.”

“Oh I don’t doubt. I want a world where my baby doesn’t have to grow up to be afraid of the monsters.” Angela looked at Mick. She agreed with him on that note. “But I don’t want her growing up in fear to be who she is because she may have abilities that would have people hunt her.”

The silence that followed made both sides realize that they were at a crossroads. There really was no right or wrong way. Or maybe there was but they haven’t found it. Angela looked at Mick and said, “I know that you and the Men of Letters have a plan but… I am suspicious of their motives and of your Mr. Ketch.”

“What does Ketch have to do with this?”

Angela stared at Mick for the longest time before saying, “Let’s just say that I don’t like him. There is something off about him.”

Mick didn’t know what to do. She was tearing apart everything that he worked for and yet… She wasn’t trying to be malicious. She was only laying her concerns but… He narrowed his eyes and said, “He is the one that cleans up the messes you and the Winchesters leave behind. You of all people should know that our world needs to be in secret.”

“I do and I also know that there are ways to do things without the loss of life.”

“What do you want from me?”

“That is the question I’m asking myself.”

Mick blinked as he huffed. He had become a little riled up over the whole thing and now it sounded like she knew what they had done. But she wasn’t giving any indication of such. It was one of the reasons why they wanted her cooperation. There was no telling what she knew and they were using him to get to her. He replied, “My friend back. Fighting with me instead of against me.”

Angela stared sadly back at Mick. “It’s not that simple, Mick and you know it.”

“To me it is.” He paused and looked away before looking back and replying, “I can make sure that they won’t hurt you or your daughter. Just… help us. Help us make the world the way you want it to be.”

Angela stared sadly back at Mick. She shook her head and answered, “I can’t do that.”

“Why not?”

“You know why.”

“For _them_?” Mick gestured angrily at nothing. “For the monsters that say they want to live in peace? You know as well as I that it only a matter of time before they give in to their base instincts.” He huffed and his breath came out in puffs.

“The same as with all human,” Angela offered with a lighthearted tone but there was no heart to it. “Just because they are with beings that are things and monsters that kill, doesn’t mean they are killers. To kill someone before they do anything… more akin to murder Mick. We’re better than that.”

“And it’s time to stop being reactive.”

“Your way…” Angela clicked her teeth and sighed. She looked up at the sky and then at Mick shaking her head slightly, “I can’t and won’t help you with that. It’s as I told Sam, I won’t be a part of mass murder and extinction. I’ll hunt but only those that have committed a crime. If you give me suitable information if you need my help… I’ll help you. But nothing more.”

There it was laid out. Mick knew that it was final. Still it was more than he hoped for when he contacted her to see her. They wanted him to pitch the deal again and he did but… He hated the feeling that he was getting from this and the fact that he was playing on their friendship. Looking at her, he knew better than to argue. He nodded, “I understand.”

“You were always more reasonable than Mac or I,” Angela offered with a slight smile.

Mick chuckled at that, “No. It was you. I mean Mac almost shot me when I told you both.”

“Scottish bullheadedness.”

They shared a laugh. It allowed Mick to smile and wish her luck before turning away. He only paused when she called to him. When he turned, he found that she was standing right in front of him and very close. He jumped slightly at that since it was something he hadn’t seen before. It was tempered when she handed him a photograph.

Actually it was two. On one side was a photo of him, her and Mac together and smiling. It was before he was recruited. He turned it over and saw that it was a shot of her, Sam and their baby. He looked up to say something but found that she had gone. He looked around trying to see where she had gone but there was no trace. He looked back at the photograph and took in the image before putting it into his coat pocket and turning towards his vehicle to head back to the base. He had a report to give and while it wasn’t exactly what they wanted… it gave him what he wanted and that was the ability to see his friend again.

As he left, he didn’t realize that he was being watched by Angela. She eyed him as he got into his car and left. Her gaze was intense as she watched the car pull onto the road.

“Are you sure it is wise that you do this?”

Angela cast a glance at her bodyguard and gave a wry grin as she watched, “Not really Kess but Mick was a friend once. It may be a help.”

Kesset studied the road as he ruffled his feathers on his wings. “Seems a lot like what he is trying to do to you. The using your friendship to help his cause.”

“It is and I know he is doing it albeit reluctantly,” Angela replied. She looked at the Avian and added, “Tactics, Kess. We both know them well but… he still is my friend.”

“I hope that it works out well for you, princess.”

“It has to Kess. I made a promise to you regarding Ayana and then there are those that I know.” Angela turned to look in the direction that Mick had gone in. She didn’t like where this was going but if she was going to protect what mattered the most, she had to be the general that people had written about. It sucked royally at times but it was a necessary. “This is for Ayana and Jess.”

Kesset made a sound and nodded, “I understand. I just hope that you and your mate will reconcile.”

Angela chuckled at that, “I didn’t leave him, Kess. I am not denying him time with his daughter. It just feels that way.”

Kesset didn’t understand but he accepted it as he put his hand on his shoulder to take her back to the cabin in the sanctuary. He didn’t like that this turn of events made it so that husband and wife looked to be at odds and tense all to protect their child and from a group that means well but they seemed to be doing things wrong. They were at a crossroads of sorts but he could easily see that this was going to be more like a deadly game of chess. He just hoped that it wouldn’t come down to the expression of the ugly and bloody or something like that. Even if that happened, he would still maintain his duty of guardian.

Angela blinked before turning to get one last look at the direction Mick had gone. She knew that she was playing upon their friendship but it was no different than what he was trying to do with her. It was more of an ‘agree to disagree’ and it put her in a position to get a look at the Men of Letters’ motives. She doubted they had changed much but she wanted to give Mick the benefit of the doubt and she had to hand it to him when he kept composure about recognizing her.

As she felt Kesset’s hand on her shoulder, she let out a small breath. This was only a respite but it was still a calculated move. She was just going to have to tread carefully and pray that when she had to make that move that could mean all the difference that she was prepared and that she wouldn’t have to lose a friend.


	16. 12.15 Heaven or Hell of the Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are tense with Sam and Angela separated but the job is still there and she has Sam's back when he takes down Ramsey the queen of the hellhounds. It becomes a little more difficult when she reveals that she knows Mick Davies. Talk about a rock and a hard place. Tag to Somewhere Between Heaven and Hell.

“Stay in the car. Keiko, guard.”

It was probably a bad idea to face a hell hound without his dog but Sam needed to give Gwen a fighting chance and he knew the Keiko would live up to her hellhound heritage from Moira. He went anyway and was promptly tackled by the thing, knocking his glasses away so he couldn’t see it. He didn’t have to see it since it was on top of him and was getting close to turning him into hellhound chow.

It was unexpected when the weight suddenly disappeared followed by a blur of fur. It had Sam gasping in surprise when he saw Gideon, hackles raised as he growled at Ramsey, the mother of all hellhounds. It was a surprise since Gideon was the runt of his litter but he had been identified as alpha material and it was making itself know, especially the fact that he was like Moira, a harridan. And it went to work as he held off Ramsey and… she came in. The distraction allowed Sam to get to his feet and ready the blade he would need to kill the damn thing.

Killing the hellhound was rather quick once he got set. All it involve was getting the blade under the ribcage and Ramsey was down. It was also rather messy. Black blood… it was the worst to get out of clothes. And he remembered when he killed a hellhound to complete the trials.

“Looks like you’re two for two.”

It was something she would say. Sam looked at his rescuer, his wife and the mother of his daughter standing there giving that lopsided grin she gave. He couldn’t help but smile at her and replied, “You have the better track record.”

“I tamed a hell hound or two,” she corrected with a slight chuckle.

It was enough to relieve the tension that had been in place since Sam told Dean that Angela wasn’t staying at the bunker anymore. Dean was upset and kept saying that she left him. It pissed him off since she didn’t leave him and they almost got into a fistfight or two over it. Before they went on this job was one of the few times that it wasn’t full of snide comments. It was more along the lines of how he and Dean used to rib each other with him complaining about Dean’s hygiene habits and Dean pointing out his cleaning preferences. More specifically the shampoo he got, which he only used because of Angela’s sensitive nose.

The other upside was that Sam had managed to spend a couple of nights with his wife. On jobs that weren’t too far, she was there and she brought Jess. It wasn’t perfect but at least he got time to spend time with his wife and daughter and he was secure that they were okay. He didn’t like that she didn’t feel safe staying in the bunker with him and Dean around. That miffed Dean since he felt that she didn’t have trust in them to keep the baby safe.

In the end, Gwen was safe and Crowley got his hellhound trophy but that still left the situation between him, Angela and Dean. Sam felt like he was on thin ice as they drove back to the bunker. Angela hitched a ride with them even though Dean had mocked her, asking why she didn’t use the mojo she used to keep herself hidden. Sam thought she dealt with it a heavy handed punch when she merely stared at his brother and gave him the cold shoulder that was a polar ice cap. It was cold enough that he felt it and the dogs gave a high pitched whine.

There was little to no conversation when they got back. Sam was prepared to say good bye to her at the door with a kiss and a promise to come to the cabin later when Dean actually invited her in for a drink. It had him alarmed since Dean used that tactic to ambush someone who earned his anger. He was more concerned that his brother would get hurt rather than her since they both had seen what happens when she got really angry.

He breathed a little easier when Dean offered her a beer asking, “Jess doing okay?”

It like watching a polite conversation regarding her interrogation methods, which they both had witnessed, as Sam watched Angela take a sip and reply, “She’s fine. Misses her father and favorite uncle.”

“Well maybe it would be better if you came home.”

Sam gritted his teeth. He heard the tone in Dean’s voice. He really didn’t want to start a fight since he was definitely going to have one on his hands when he told Dean about his saying yes to the Brits. He steeled himself to step in since there were a lot of things that he tolerated from Dean but being disrespectful to his wife… another story.

As it turned out, he didn’t need to when Angela replied, “Not as long as they are here and have the ability to get in the bunker even with my wards.” She gave Dean a steely eyed look that would have made Ramsey the hellhound piss on herself if she were still alive.

Dean eyed her back before taking a sip of his beer. “No excuse for taking off and leaving Sam,” he said more to be a pain.

“She didn’t leave me,” Sam gritted out and eyed his brother with a narrow eyed look. He would have said more but Angela had her hand on his arm. He calmed down as her hand slid downwards and touched the skin of his hand.

_What are you doing Angie?_

_Singing you a lullaby._

It had been a personal joke since Angela did see the Avengers film in a fit of whimsy as she called it. It was in reference to the Black Widow’s ability to soothe the Hulk down. She had teased him horribly about it but it caught on and since then it was used more as a code to indicate when he was agitated or she was. Sometimes they didn’t have to ask. In this case, she knew the cause and was ready to respond as she did now as she said to Dean, “Don’t say anything about which you don’t understand, Dean Winchester. Unless you really want to know.”

A pin could have dropped and Sam saw that Dean was ready to give in but not without a fight as he said, “Then why not come to us? We’ve been together for years and this is the first time in… forever that you do this.”

Angela was quiet for a moment. Sam saw it for what it was and that was contemplating her answer so that it didn’t sound as bad. She then said, “I know it was rash but I have history with the Brits that is not so pleasant and… It is very… _very_ hard to act normal when my instincts are rearing its head. I am having a hard time functioning like normal when every fiber of my being is screaming to keep my baby safe. Everything that is perceived to be a threat…” She made a gesture to indicate her fangs.

Sam blinked as he heard her explanation. He knew she was scared but to hear that her vamp half was asserting itself and to a point where it was making it difficult for her… It made him feel guilty for the conversation they had when she left the bunker. He would have said something but his phone rang. He checked it and found that it was from Mick. Great.

The ringing was enough to break the tension of the conversation since Dean looked at Angela and said, “Well cool your instincts for a moment.”

For Sam, he couldn’t really hide it since he basically ignored the call in front of them. Now attention was on him as Dean asked, “Is that your computer talking to you again?”

Sam looked at the pair looking at him, “No. It’s, uh… Mick Davies.”

“What?”

Sam recognized his brother’s expressions and knew most of his wife’s. The look she was giving though… It had him wondering. He focused on his brother though since he knew he had to come clean, “Dean… I don’t have a computer program feeding me cases. I uh… Gwen? Every job we’ve worked in the last two weeks… They’ve all come from the British Men of Letters.”

It was expected when Dean put his beer down and looked at him with that look. “Really?”

“Yeah. I didn’t tell you cause I know how much you hate them.”

Dean was quick to correct him, “No, we hate them. Us. Together.”

“I get that. Yeah, I do. But… but…” Sam sighed since this was a similar pitch he used with Angela and she wasn’t biting. But he had to give it again, “Dean, because of Mick and his guys the alpha vamp of one clan is dead. They get results.”

It was not comfortable with the look on Dean’s face and the look that was fast becoming the second hated expression his wife was giving him. Still Sam gave his explanation. Sure he didn’t like them either. They tortured him and they could have done worse to his wife when she was pregnant. He sighed at Dean’s expression, “Either way, I shouldn’t have lied to you. And I’m sorry.”

“Well… okay.”

Sam frowned a bit at his brother’s response, “Okay?”

“What do you want me to say? So I like them? No. Do I trust them? Hell no.” Dean took a breath and added, “You’re working with them when your wife is on the run because of them?”

“Like I said,” Angela interrupted softly, “A past history.”

Like that was any better. Sam knew that it wasn’t. It certainly perked up when Dean said that he was right. He looked up and stared at his brother. Dean continued, “We work with people we don’t trust all the time. I mean, hell, I just Liam Neeson’d it up with Crowley and Angie… past history up the whazoo. So if you wanna give this a shot, then… Fine.”

Sam was surprised by Dean’s willingness to go along with this. Never really before had Dean followed his lead completely on something like this. Angela stood by him even when she disagreed but it really couldn’t count. She stood by him no matter what but… she would fight him if it was to save him from himself. Hell, she proved that when she tried to stop him from setting Lucifer free when he jumpstarted the Apocalypse.

“But the minute… and I mean the second… something feels off, we bail,” Dean warned.

“Yeah, of course. Deal,” Sam agreed.

“Deal,” Angela replied.

Sam looked at her the same time as Dean did. Her expression didn’t change but… He looked at her with a raised brow. What was she thinking?

Angela looked at him and Dean and replied, “I may not be staying at the bunker but the jobs lately are the usual meaning saving people.” She looked at them and noted their expressions and continued, “Know thyself and know thy enemy. He will win who knows when to fight and when not to fight.”

Dean looked at her and then at Sam before asking, “So you’re not willing to come home but you’re still working the job?” He raised his brow.

“Ever figure out why Crowley couldn’t just snap me to Sheridan?” She raised her brow at both brothers.

Sam had wondered about that. He knew she was good with warding sigils and she was meticulous about them. It was knowledge worthy of the Men of Letters and Sherlock certainly had an appreciation for her ability. Now that she more or less admitted what she had done, a lot of things made a lot of sense now.

Dean nodded appreciatively at that. Sam though could tell that his brother just wanted to see her slap the demon again. He had to admit that it was hilarious and never failed to make him give the slightest of smiles. Still that revelation was better. It also lightened the load that was hanging between them all since he knew for certain that their daughter was safe. It certainly helped when Mick called back with need for a report and possibly another job and it was a conversation that he didn’t look forward to.

“Let me guess, Mick wanted to know how it went,” Angela said.

Sam looked at her and his brother and his mouth quivered slightly as he replied, “Uh… yeah. Um…”

“Figures,” Angela replied as she took a sip of her beer. “Meticulous and detail oriented but definitely not field material.” She gave a slight chuckle at that. She relaxed some more and looked at nothing in particular as she took another sip of beer.

“Yeah I get the know nothing,” Dean countered, “But about the other stuff…”

“Dean.” Sam didn’t want to put Angela through an interrogation. He moved to interrupt the questioning before it blew up the nice interlude they were having before she left to go back to their daughter.

“I mean…” Dean glanced at Sam with a look to be quiet. He shifted back towards Angela and continued, “That made it sound like it was personal.”

“I do know the Brits, Dean,” Angela countered as she looked at him. She held her beer in a casual manner as she looked at both Winchesters head on. She then got up and walked out of the room. She was back a few minutes later with a file folder.

Sam recognized the file type. They were from the case files of the Men of Letters. What was she doing with one of those? He saw that Dean was curious as well and merely voiced it out loud, “What are you doing with a case file, Angie?”

They got their answer the second she put the open file down on the table and turned it towards them. Sam glanced at her as she stared downward at them. His gaze caught hers but only briefly as she shifted to look downwards and tapped on the photograph that was facing them. He looked down and things started to make a little sense.

“Whoa. You, Mac and…” Dean was looking at her with a wide eyed look.

“That was before Mick became official,” she offered. “Over ten years ago.”

“So you know someone on the inside?”

Sam knew the question was a disarming one. She taught Dean how to better that technique and he used it more often than he liked. He looked at his brother and breathed, “Dean…”

“We knew each other. It’s why I met and spoke to him,” Angela replied in a matter of fact tone. Sam knew that Dean was probably going to say something and he had a few questions himself. She answered them as she continued, “I know how to conduct a meet. I used to work for government agencies.”

“One,” Dean corrected, “And that was not even official. Fricking JFK.” He looked away for a moment.

“Who do you think taught me spy craft?” Angela looked at both Sam and Dean with that question and a bemused expression on her face. “Point is, I didn’t go without backup. And it was a talk between old friends.”

“Well at least you’re not sleeping with the enemy.”

Sam would have punched Dean for that one. He was held back when Angela reached over and stoked the top of his hand. She looked at both of them as she said, “Mick… is a legacy. Like you too. You can imagine Mac felt it to be a betrayal and he has a good reason for that. I didn’t understand it at first but…”

“You let it go,” Sam stated more than asked.

“Yes,” Angela replied with a firm look. She looked at them both before she continued, “I let it go to some point since we haven’t spoken to each other in over ten years. He’s a librarian, not a field man.” She shook her head slightly. “And yes, he pitched to me.”

“And you said yes,” Dean replied making the face he did where he was trying to be nice but in fact he was livid.

“I made the terms,” Angela clarified. She gave them a pointed look. “I will not hide with my head stuck in the sand. But I won’t go into something if it is against everything I believe in. Besides…” She gave a shrug before continuing, “What better way to get information?”

The conversation was over and the silence ensued. Sam felt uncomfortable about it. Sure they were polite but that was all it was. Angela was able to do a Skype session so he and Dean could see Jess before she left. Sam knew that he was going to have to have a series of conversations between them. Hell, he wasn’t sure he liked the fact that his wife was going to work with them and get into this whole using them thing. It was a bit of a hard blow to learn that she knew Mick Davies but then again she said they hadn’t spoken for a long time…

It was the moment of truth when Angela grabbed her jacket and walked towards the door to leave. Sam didn’t want her to go and it felt the same way every time he said goodbye. The last time it felt like a one night stand since that was just her and… It also didn’t help that she slept on his side of the bed but he couldn’t blame her for that. And he did tuck her in on his side when she was pregnant and after being rescued from that Toni bitch.

“Well… I have to go.”

“Yeah,” Dean was replying, “Gotta make sure Jess is…” He pursed his lips and turned away.

Sam watched as Angela looked saddened for a moment before she turned and headed up the stairs. He walked to catch up with her and grabbed her hand. “Angie.”

“I have to go Sam,” she said.

“Just… wait.” Sam held onto her hand and held it in his large ones. He looked at her, took in her features before leaning in and giving her a gentle kiss on the lips and then shifted to press his forehead against hers. “I love you.”

“I love you. I want to come home.”

“I know but… Jess is important.” Sam continued to rub his head against hers. He liked the fact that this vamp sign of affection was well accepted and considered very normal in public. He sighed as he took comfort in her touch and smiled when she responded in kind. “And… I think you’re doing the right thing.”

“It just… it sucks.”

Sam was in agreement. It wasn’t the most ideal of situations. He really did think that they were doing some good work here with the Brits but he couldn’t deny that his priority was his daughter and his wife had that in mind. It was precaution and he felt secure that they were taking precautions. He still had to think about the one eighty she did by agreeing to work with them but he got where she was going by quoting Sun Tzu.

“I have to go.”

Sam sighed, not wanting to let her go. But he had to. “Alright,” he breathed as he pressed a final kiss to her lips. He pulled back to look at her. He took in her features and noted the glittery look in her eyes. They were vibrant and full of life but full of emotions. He put his hand and rubbed her cheek. “I’ll come by in a couple of days.”

“We’ll be waiting.”

Sam sighed as Angela stepped out of the bunker. He didn’t like the situation but he felt lucky and blessed that he had a partner, his wife, working with him. They both wanted the same things and if he wanted to look at it through a tactical standpoint, they were covering all their bases. Dean was right in this. Yes, they would work with the Brits but if something went wrong, then they were bailing. It was a dance they did all the time, dancing with the devil and it was often better the one that you knew than the one you didn’t. It wasn’t either or. Just somewhere in between.


	17. 12.16 Drink with the Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Claire thought she could do the job alone but she was bitten by the werewolf. In the aftermath, she thinks about the people who tried to save her and the one who was willing to risk her life to save hers. Tag to Ladies Drink Free.

_There is another way._

_What the Siglione cure? There’s no proof it will work any better than plasma therapy._

_Proof in the bunker._

Claire sat in the car as she looked at nothing in particular. She drummed her fingers on the steering wheel. She had decided to take a break from the drive and it gave her time to think about what happened on the last job.

She hadn’t expected to see Angela in town on the same job and without Sam or Dean trailing her. She figured something was up and teased the older woman about having a fight with them. It had been a bad move on her end since Angela gave her that look that was similar when she and Alex pestered her about her and Sam being mates instead of husband and wife. She apologized at once and asked her to team up.

It certainly was better to team up and quite interesting. Even though Angela was older, the young guys responded to her. Claire thought it had something to do with being a half vampire. And it wasn’t like you couldn’t do anything contrary to her wishes. One look and… Jodi had nothing on her when it came to the look. It was like having an older sister though.

_You can’t keep lying to Jodi._

Sam wasn’t the only one to tell her to talk to Jodi and tell her what was going on. Angela did too only she spoke from a tone of sadness and experience. Claire had heard the stories about Angela and how she traveled the world through time. It was pretty cool to meet someone that had shared a drink or two with someone like Theodore Roosevelt but coming from the source, Claire could always hear the hint of sadness.

Angela and Sam were right though. Claire had erroneously thought that everyone was happy with her on the road with the story of her looking at colleges when instead she was hunting. Angela was not happy but she understood. Claire always thought she was the more reasonable and cooler of the three hunters and she was glad that Angela was on her side.

_And even if it doesn’t work, the Siglione cure will work._

_Angie…_

_I know the risks and I am willing to take it._

Claire probably shouldn’t have asked what it was. She got the plasma therapy thing from that guy Mick Davies. But what Angela mentioned… that sounded something else and like one of her backup plans. What she found out, it literally was a life on the line and it didn’t mean the one who had been turned into a werewolf.

What Claire found out that the cure Angela was talking about was a concoction that required that she consume the tonic and then bite Angela and taste her blood. More specifically it was the blood of a vampire and Claire could see where the concern from Sam and Dean came from. Angela was half vampire and that meant possibly death on her end. It certainly made Mick go crazy when Angela said that she had done it before and would do it again.

_You can’t be serious._

_It’s my life. I hold all the votes._

_And I… agree._

It had to have been a hard blow to Dean to hear that from Angela. In truth, Claire was glad that Angela was on her side with this. But it also seemed that Angela wasn’t going to let it go so easily either or rather let her go. The woman was determined to stand by her even though she was suffering through the change and continually said that they would have the cure.

It had been agreed upon to use the plasma therapy once it had been made clear that there was a threat to not only her life but Angela’s. Claire was used to the mother from Jodi but this was different. Angela always acted like a mom when she visited but there was something else. The woman had a quiet authority that demanded it be obeyed when it was serious. In that moment Claire could see why Sam and Dean didn’t argue when Angela became firm.

_You gotta have faith, Claire. Faith, hope… and love._

Claire never expected Angela to recite verses from the Bible. It surprised her and it had Mick scoff a little but he didn’t say anything. Rather when Angela looked at him, he became quiet. In fact to Claire it seemed like they knew each other. She couldn’t focus on that when it became worse and then the werewolf that bit her barged into the room. She was too overcome to really notice what Angela was doing. Her only clear thoughts were when the werewolf tied her up and started in the whole thing about the pack and that he was a nice guy. Then she turned.

Claire had no idea what she was going to do except that she had the urge to hunt and kill. And when she saw Angela, she wanted to rip the woman apart. The scent drove her crazy. And it was the first time that she had seen Angela with her fangs fully elongated and the glowing orbs… it drove her to want to kill but…

_Claire. Stop._

Instinct told her that the thing in front of her was an enemy. But another overpowering instinct was telling her to listen and obey. She snarled and snapped at her but she couldn’t get close. She really, _really_ want to rip the woman to shreds. She had her hands up and swiped at her but she couldn’t get close enough even though Angela wasn’t moving.

Claire was fairly cognizant even though the instinct to feed and hunt was driving her mad. She was able to see Dean and Mick wanting to advance but even they were held back by Angela. It caused Claire to snarl at Angela until she found herself in a bear hug from the woman.

She fought against the hold and was surprised that the woman moved that fast. Claire was strong from the turning but not strong enough to break the hold Angela had on her. The woman held fast even when they pumped the cure into her.

_I won’t leave her alone. I won’t leave you alone, Claire._

Claire gave a soft smile. She had heard Angela say that in a low tone. Even though the woman was tough and firm, she was also gentle, warm… and caring. Even when in the thick of battle, she always thought of others that may be caught in the crossfire. She did the same when Alex had troubles with those vamps in Sioux Falls and she was pregnant at the time. In any case, Claire thought she was totally badass and would never call her an old lady like she call Sam an old man.

She was happy to find that she had been cured and a little creeped out. The creeped out part came from the fact that Angela had stuck her face right in hers and peered at her with that bland stare that made her squirm. Claire thought she saw the woman’s nose twitch a couple of times and the uncomfortable thought that she was sniffing her out crossed her mind. It disappeared when Angel nodded in approval and looked at Sam and Dean with a reassuring smile. It allowed Claire to saw that they looked like crap.

_Even if Mick’s cure didn’t work, I would have gone with the other one._

_Why?_

_Because I care about you._

Claire had thought that people were most happy when she was out of the way. As she told Sam, the whole hunting thing with Jodi she had to stay in the car and Jodi wanted her to have a normal life. Claire knew that wasn’t for her after everything. She told Angela that when they met in town in the bar and the woman seemed to have a sad look like she was sorry that she felt that. That was why it was a surprise when Angela offered to give her a hand and teach her a few things.

Claire had to admit that hunting with someone was a lot less lonely than solo. There was also the practical benefits of having backup as the schooling lesson went when Angela said she was staying with her. And she really wasn’t going to argue with the woman who had actually ripped off a vampire’s arm and pregnancy hormones be damned. Claire realized that she was loved and it was why she called Jodi to tell her what happened.

_A wise man once told me that family doesn’t end in blood. Sometimes you have to make your family. It’s the people that care about you and would do anything for you no matter what._

Claire had lost her dad when he said yes to Castiel and then she lost her mom when that Grigori killed her. They were people she loved and they loved her but in the process, she gained others that loved her just as much. Granted she thought that one of them was crazy for accepting just like that with no strings… it was a pretty good feeling.

Shifting the gears of her car, Claire pulled back onto the road and continued driving. She had to find her way yes but she had people who cared about her. Jodi may not be her mom but she looked after her like one and maybe it was like it was once pointed out to her that when someone does that it was to show the other that they are worth something to the world. It was philosophy junk but it made sense.

A whine caught her attention and she glanced over at the puppy that was sitting in the passenger seat, looking at her with an inquisitive look. Claire’s lip twitched as she reached over and rubbed the puppy’s ears. She giggled slightly when the puppy swiped her hand with its wet tongue and wiped the drool off as she made the turn off the main road and down what looked like a private drive but it was more dirt than paved.

The place was pretty fancy for a cabin but Claire wasn’t going to complain as she pulled up next to the other car that parked there. She really couldn’t believe that car was a racer. She let the puppy out and pulled her duffle out of the car and walked up the steps with slight trepidation. She looked down at the puppy and said, “Well here goes nothing Zeke.”

The knock sounded loud out in the woods and Claire waited with trepidation but not for long since the door opened to reveal someone who put up with all the crap and never failed to let it be known who was acting like a bitch. Claire stared up at the woman at the door and said, “Um, hey… can… can… can you… teach me?”

Angela stared at Claire for a long time before gesturing her to come in. “Come on.”

Claire hadn’t expected it and was scared that the offer hadn’t been serious. She should have known better. She kept silent as she followed Angela through the cabin and was settled in. It was a shock to not see Sam there since she always had seen them together and the uncanny way they always knew what the other was thinking. She wanted to ask but didn’t since she figured that it was none of her business and she really didn’t want to invoke the look that meant she was in trouble.

“I will teach you a few things but understand this… there is a reason for everything.”

It was a reminder that she had been foolish and Claire felt guilty about it as she listened to the rules that were in place. This was what she wanted and Angela had offered so that she could better protect herself. She knew the older woman didn’t like it over much but she was going to help her out. Maybe that was what was so different. Claire shifted her attention to the older woman and made a promise to learn what she could.


	18. 12.17 Invasion of the British Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angie knows that Mick had to make a choice and thinks about it while she sees Eileen off and then has a conversation. What she hears confirms her worst fears and she loses a friend in the process. She knows what she has to do and it could get bloody. Tag to The British Invasion.

_The Code is what separates us from the monsters._

“Then the question I ask you, Mick, is who truly is the monster?”

Angela looked at the open case file on the table. She stared at the picture of her, Mac and Mick, years younger. Her fingertip caressed the picture, lingering on Mick’s face. A noise caught her attention and she saw Eileen carrying her bag and heading towards the exit but she paused to see her. She gave the girl a gentle smile and signed, _You’re leaving?_

 _Yes_ , Eileen signed back.

Angela gave a sigh as she noticed the watery tears. She stood up and embraced the girl in a hug. She murmured, “It’s okay. It was a mistake. Not your fault.” She pulled back and repeated it in sign and signed her pet name for Eileen.

_But I killed a man. A human. He wasn’t a monster._

That was up for debate but Angela let go of her bias since Eileen was hurting. She signed back, _It was an accident. I know. I’ve done the same too. And it haunts me every day of my long, long life._

_How do you do it? I mean… you have a baby now._

Angela looked at Eileen and let the girl vent in sign. When she was done, she explained in sign and words, “I keep going with the hope that the next choice I make is the right one. No one can see what will happen in the future and I have to hope that what I do from that point on will do some good. As for Jess… I truly hope that being good at this makes me better at being a mother. Everything I do is for my family.”

It took a little time until Eileen decided that she was going to head home to Ireland. Angela wished her luck and told her to call her friend Mac. She knew that the Brits were strict about their rules and codes. It was a thing that had them despise her in general over the centuries with the exception of a few. She knew that Mick would report in and they wouldn’t leave it be.

Watching Eileen leave the bunker, Angela reached over for the phone and looked at it. She glanced over at the picture on the table. Her mind made up she dialed the number that she had put in the moment she made her choice. She held it up to her ear and heard the dial tone and held her breath slightly. She let it out when she held the telltale signs of it being picked up.

_Angie?_

“Mick, you in the mood to talk?”

_Don’t know if I should._

Angela made a slight face and replied, “Don’t give me that you wanker.”

The chuckle on the other end of the line had her smile. The last time she used that expression was over ten years ago. She had learned it from Mac first and then when Mick used it… Those were good times then even when she knew what Mick was. She took a breath and said, “You did the right thing.”

_Did I? Really?_

“Yes,” Angela replied as she exited the bunker and leaned against the railing to look up at the sky. “It was an accident. If you start killing because of an accident… then that says something and it’s not favorable to them.”

_The Code demands it Angie._

“And look what happened there,” Angela countered. She took a couple of breaths to calm down. She felt her power rise much like it did when they encountered Dagon. During that, she was certain that Mick saw everything and no doubt was even more conflicted about her. She pushed that aside as she brought back the reason she severed relations, “Your Dr. Hess tried to have me killed and for what? For helping get a family out so they could live in peace.”

The silence on the other end was hardly encouraging. There was noise on the other end and Angela recognized the sounds that Mick made. She blinked slowly and stated rather than asked, “You didn’t know.”

_No. Angie… I… I didn’t know they did that to you. I wanted to bring you in…_

“I know,” she replied in a reassuring tone. “And to be honest, that was a surprising thing since I am what I am.” She paced outside and looked around. “Mick… you guys have done good work but… the Code isn’t everything.”

_It’s all I have, Angie. They took me in. Gave me a life._

“And you feel like you owe them something.” Angela paused and looked at nothing in particular. Her eyes scanned the landscape as her expression turned into a worried one. “But you don’t, Mick. We have the same goal and that is to make the world a safer place. Nothing is absolute in this world.”

_The Code is what creates order…_

“And what happens when order creates chaos?” Angela felt her throat convulse. She knew that this was a critical point. She felt that it was the beginning when Sam managed to convince the man to let Eileen go. Of course she put herself in the way of a bullet much to everyone’s consternation. “When the good thing stoops to that of the bad thing…”

_Then it stops being a good thing. I know. I just… I understand Angie. You’ve done good things. You, Sam and Dean. You may not be formally trained but… you know how the world works and I admire you. I admired the fact that you have always managed to save lives, even those that… well you know. You are the better person. You and Mac._

“You’re a good man too, Mick,” Angela replied with a slight smile. “I know what you did to your best friend. You are not the first person to… believe that there is only one choice. I was the same at one point. So was Mac. So were Sam and Dean. It is called being human. The point is to learn from it and try not to do it again.”

_How did you know?_

Angela snorted a chuckle at that. She knew that Mick would be curious and it was time he learned the truth. “Please. The Men of Letters letting me live after they tried to kill me before I met you? Then you come along and decide to play nice? I may be old but not completely naïve.”

_Never said you were. If you knew what I was doing, why did you continue to meet with me? Why didn’t you tell Mac and then be done with it?_

Angela paced the porch for a time and thought about what to say. Humming a little, she finally said, “Because I sensed that you were different Mick. I get that about people sometimes. There was something about you and I was right. And I knew that you would be the one to tell us. Guess that explains why I was able to let go much more easily than Mac.”

_But why?_

“Because I knew that you weren’t completely lost. I knew that if you were, you would have killed me on the spot. You knew what I was the first day we met and you could have taken the shot but you didn’t. And that says something.”

There was silence on the other end. It was hardly encouraging but Angela’s ear could pick up Mick’s breathing. He was listening and considering her words. It allowed her to continue, “I know things didn’t go well when you made your commitment but… I knew what I was getting into and in all honesty, back then, I was playing you as much as you were playing me but I never once thought of you as collateral. You are my friend Mick Davies.”

_Figured you would play me. I had read up on you and… the elders made you my long term assignment. They saw the rapport and… you know. But… I couldn’t go through it._

“Why?”

_It’s like what I heard Sam say about you. You are a good person. You may do things that may anger or seem not to make sense at the time but… in the end you are right even if it doesn’t feel right. I can tell Sam sees that no matter what and he will protect you and probably better than I did._

Angela shook her head at that, “Don’t do that to yourself Mick. You didn’t know what they did to me and I never wanted you to know and I feel dirty using it to get you to understand my view.”

_We all do it love. But you are better for it. And… I think you are right. All the good you three have done… Look what came out of it. You have a daughter. You are a good friend Angie. You and Mac were and better people than I ever will be. For that… I thank you._

The tone sounded off to Angela and she narrowed her eyes, “Mick, what are you up to?”

_I’ll do what I can to make sure that they won’t find Jess. Just do what you have to do and fight._

“Mick? Mick!”

Angela shouted into the phone until she heard sounds. She recognized Ketch’s voice and Mick’s gravelly tone. She could tell he was weary with the whole thing. It was then that she heard the one voice that made her blood boil. It was the equivalent of when Sam had been seriously injured and she pretty much went postal after Crowley and everything else and she still was suffering from the effects of Purgatory. She heard the tones and remembered when she first met the woman.

_That’s where you are wrong._

Angela blinked as Mick’s voice came in loud and clear. She realized that he had muted her but left it so she could hear everything. Her mouth opened as she listened to the conversation. Nothing came out; it was one of those times that she was rendered speechless.

_There is one thing that failed to be told and that is that the Winchesters and the Malachi have saved a lot of lives. She has saved more lives and has worked with us in spite of the fact that you tried to kill her and killed that family._

_So you know about that. It wasn’t supposed to be this way…_

Dean had always said that she had super hearing and Angela never disagreed. For once, she wished she wasn’t that good with it. Normal human ears couldn’t hear it but hers can. The unmistakable sound of a silenced weapon and the splash of blood and a thump. She made a slight gasp as she heard it and her breathing quickened. He was dead. Mick was dead and he died defending her.

_Maybe I want to do one good thing, the right thing because I know and feel it is right._

She barely felt the tear trickle down. Her lip trembled as it felt like the air left her lungs. She blinked as she heard Dr. Hess continue to talk. She had to focus. That was the part of her that had Mick’s admiration and had made her liked and hated by many.

_Acceptance or elimination._

Angela pursed her lips. So that is what it came down to. She ended the conversation and held her phone for a time. Then she flipped it over and popped the casing open and pulled out the sim card rapidly. She held it in her mouth while she fished out a fresh one and put it in. Taking the removed sim card, she made to throw it but paused. She closed her eyes and looked downward and lowered her hand. She looked at the chip.

“I don’t remember you being quite this sentimental.”

Angela snorted as she closed her fist and held it against the railing. She looked at the companion that joined her and replied, “Only because you saw what you wanted to see and it’s not like you learned about compassion from me.” She looked away before asking, “What are you doing here Britannia? Thought you weren’t coming in until tomorrow.”

“I caught the overnight and it’s a good thing too.”

“You heard that huh?” Angela leaned on the railing and glanced over at the woman that had joined her. She hadn’t seen her in a couple of decades or so but their correspondence was fairly frequent in their terms.

“Down to the silencer.” Britannia sighed as she leaned against the railing with her. She sighed as she looked out into the night. “And it seems worse than when you last mentioned it.”

“Had to give them a chance and it was Mick.” Angela gave a lopsided grin at that but it was more apologetic. She looked at Britannia and then back out at nothing. “And it was all for nothing.”

“So what are you going to do? Tell them?” Britannia gestured towards the door.

Angela looked at the door. There was no room for negotiation. What she heard over the phone, it meant that a war was coming. She knew she was going to have to tell them eventually. She looked downward since her instincts were starting to rear their head when her thoughts lit on her beautiful baby waiting for her at the sanctuary. She knew that Dr. Hess would be after her. Kill the mother, raise the daughter into the perfect hunter and in the hypocritical fashion.

Looking back at the door, she replied, “Eventually.” She took out her phone and flipped open her contact list. She continued, “But right now we have to make ready.”

“Please tell me it is what I think it is,” Britannia replied with a chuckle as she grinned at Angela.

Angela gave a wry look at the woman but she couldn’t deny it. “It is.” She held up the phone and waited for the other end to pick up. “It’s me. We’ve got a situation.”

Britannia studied Angela as Angela looked back at her. She pulled out her gun that was in her handbag and readied it to shoot. She looked expectantly at Angela as the woman looked at her and said, “Yeah that’s right. We’re going to war.”


	19. 12.18 Memory of the Light Remains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Britannia is a double agent but she is loyal to Angela. And it all stems from a memory long ago. Tag to The Memory Remains.

_Everything has been written. Everybody knows everything about me. There are no secrets except the ones in my closet. Kirby Puckett._

Britannia pursed her lips as she followed the team into the bunker. She never thought that she would be here under these circumstances. In fact she never thought that she would be here at all. Not after all the grief she went through to keep the Men of Letters off her back. But it wasn’t to be the moment they sent that smug bitch Toni here and then the events that unfolded from that.

Britannia grew up learning the ways of the Men of Letters. She went through the schooling, the training and even the stupid and pointless tests that Dr. Hess tried to do pin on her. What changed her mind about the whole thing was the same test that Mick Davies went through. She was forced to kill the girl she thought was her friend because she didn’t want to die. It was self-defense but that didn’t make things better and then the whole accident that…

Britannia shifted and looked around. Her dark hair was perfectly coiffed into a knot at the base of her skull. Her makeup was perfect. It was said that she was perfection in of itself in terms of her beauty. At least that was how Ketch saw her and when he tried to ‘woo’ her. She never liked him and would give him the cold shoulder. Of course it earned her a reputation in the Men of Letters and she was now only called on special jobs.

Special jobs. That was what she did. And what Ketch did too. If you wanted to look at it, they basically were like the hunters. They did the dirty work for the Men of Letters. And they said the hunters were like dogs that needed to be leashed. She thought so too until she met her.

She should have killed her the first time they met. The same for Mick. They both should have killed her. But they didn’t. Mick, he was an old friend before he had been rescued and brought up. Her… she never was really quite sure. Something told her that if she were to kill her, then it would be bad for everyone. Turns out her choice was the right one but only after things had gotten bloody.

The Malachi had met her in London. The city had been warded so they knew that someone that was not completely human had arrived in their city. The hunters were dispatched. They all returned bloodied and bruised. Britannia had been sent after her since she was one of the best and Ketch… well he was getting his shits and giggles elsewhere at the time. It seemed that it was fate that brought her to meet the one that had been written about in lore and their American Men of Letters branch had documented well.

It was a rather bloody fight. Britannia ended up with a concussion and a couple of busted ribs and that was being let off easy. She was well aware that the Malachi could have done worse and possibly kill her but she didn’t. It led Britannia to believe that there was more to things than what she had been taught to believe. She had been reluctant at first to think that there was such a thing as a good monster but… After the incident with the one family, she knew that there was something wrong.

It took a lot to convince the Malachi to let her be her eyes and ears within the Men of Letters. Britannia suggested it citing that she didn’t like what the Men of Letters were doing and she wanted to be able to change it. She noted the look on the Malachi’s face at the time but she couldn’t quite determine what the expression was. Now as she stood there watching and listening to Ketch give orders, she knew what it was.

“Like how does Sam get his hair so shiny? How many ratty flannels Dean has?”

Britannia looked up and noted the underlings start to move and catalogue everything in the bunker and search for the Colt. She sighed and looked at Ketch and asked, “And what are you going to do, Ketch? That vulgar phrase of shits and giggles.”

It was perverse pleasure getting Ketch riled up and it was clear he didn’t like her presence there when he replied, “We are here to do a job, Lady Kensington. You best better do it.”

The utter look of disgust was plain on his face but the looks of terror and nervousness were clear on the others. Britannia knew it was well earned and the accident that made her unique… she knew the situation she was in and she went to great lengths to keep up her reputation while hiding the one secret that only the Malachi knew. Not even Mick knew and she tolerated the man more so than Ketch.

Smiling a simpering smile at Ketch, she replied, “I see you still resent that I have title and you don’t and you have to share the spotlight of being a cleaner.”

“You’re only here because you can profile on the spot.”

Britannia took in Ketch’s expression. She loathed the man but she knew that her position was ideal for the war that was coming. The sad thing was that the players involved… most of them didn’t know what was happening. This was what the tomes spoke of in the Malachi’s ability to lead and plan tactically. The great general of generals. And yet, the thought of it was saddening and that was the look that Britannia now knew was shown to her that day.

_You know what it means now that Mick is dead._

_I do… which is why I can’t tell them about what the plans are._

_I thought you shared everything._

Britannia pushed the memory of her clandestine visit to the back of her mind as she did a walkthrough of the bunker. The standard equipment of the organization was there but she could see the subtle touches that made it home to the Winchesters. She walked through where the rooms were. She went through Dean’s room and noted how he had personalized it before walking over to where she knew she had to be discrete.

The room was definitely Sam’s room but it was also hers. It was no surprise since the Malachi and Sam were together. They just had a baby together. There were touches of both of adults in the rooms. The sitting parlor was clear in its intention, a small sort of family room. The bedroom was just off on the side and it was pretty roomy with a small dressing room that had been converted into the baby’s room. It was small but it was clear that there was a happy little family here and now…

“So… what can you tell us?”

Britannia closed her eyes and heaved a breath but didn’t turn. She knew that Ketch was behind her and he always looked for ways to mock her ability profile a scene. It was what made her so good especially when a target was being elusive. She opened them and replied, “I can tell you that the older Winchester has a case of over protectiveness, more like a hero complex; he would risk a lot for civilians. As for the younger… intelligence.”

“That all?”

Britannia spun on her heel to look at Ketch with firm look as she replied, “I can tell you that the three primaries are skilled hunters. Better than that woman you’re screwing.” She smirked slightly at the look Ketch shot her way. She walked out of the room and down the hall to the library and continued to speak, “But there is one that you should be highly concerned about.”

“Please,” Ketch said in a bored tone, “Don’t try to sell me the bedtime story of the Malachi.”

“You should have respect for her,” Britannia countered, “Considering that while everything is homey here, there are hints of deadliness here and there.”

It was with pleasure that Britannia began on her analysis while the underlings were listening and doing their job. She pointed out in that needling way that annoyed Ketch the reason why the elders kept her around and catered to her whims. She revealed certain locations that she had been instructed to reveal to show the preparedness of the Malachi as well as reveal what they couldn’t find; that there were other beings living there. The look on Ketch’s face was satisfactory enough and she preserved it in memory. She knew the elders, especially that old crone Dr. Hess, were listening and that was the plan.

_More than the Winchesters live here._

_I know they bloody Malachi._

_No. The Winchesters live here yes but there are others. Beings that no doubt are loyal…_

Britannia knew that Ketch didn’t find any evidence of other people living in the bunker. It made it all the more sweeter and if he truly knew how she knew more details… She gave her assessment as she finished the walkthrough. It was also how she garnered her reputation. She learned the basics of profiling and honed her skills with tracking and hunting. Combat training added to it and made her someone that knows how to be a lady but also what the order needed to do what they needed done. It was also what she used to track the Malachi before she changed her mind. Profiling was the thing especially if the monster was intelligent.

It was thrilling to be profiling again but she didn’t like it because it was on her friend and her family. But she had been told to do it. It was her job, as Ketch pointed out so often. So she gave her assessment and went with it. She never thought betrayal to a monster could be so distasteful.

“Seeing that look on your face means that everything went well.”

Britannia shifted to look at the Malachi as she came out to hand her a glass of Merlot. She gave a sigh and replied, “About as well as it could be. Ketch even is doing his creepy pervert thing.” She looked at the Malachi and added, “He took one of Dean’s pictures. The one with him and his mother.”

Britannia had only heard stories about the great tactician and her own personal experiences didn’t come close to confirming or denying them. But she could say that she was in the presence of someone who felt deeply and her decisions reflected them even if they didn’t sound logical at times. This time though… She said, “Ketch has always been…”

“I figured.”

Britannia pursed her lips at the hand silencing her. She swallowed slightly before changing track, “They went through everything and… I gave my assessment.” She looked at the Malachi in the eye and added, “I profiled everything.”

The Malachi looked at her and nodded, “As I told you to.”

That was the truth. Britannia gave a slightly lopsided smile, “And I said that I would do anything to protect you, help you.” She looked at the Malachi in the eye, “And I will fight for you.”

Britannia had made the oath to protect and help the Malachi if she were in trouble. The details she kept to herself and made it official in the eyes of the cosmos. Maybe it was an extreme of sacrifice but Britannia believed that the Men of Letters may not have all the right answers; that everything was not so black and white. Mick had been convinced and he paid for it with his life. It made the stakes very real. She had an idea when she made her promise but this was putting it into perspective and she knew what was at stake.

“And I don’t want you to.”

“Too bad,” Britannia countered. She took a sip of the wine. She made an appreciative smile at the taste before continuing, “But you were right then and still right now. I believe the organization was once a good thing and it may have started out doing a lot of good but… You know that with Mick dead and the whole thing with Renny…”

“They are coming after us,” the Malachi replied, “Which is why I started making plans.” She shook her head slightly and added, “And not necessarily liking it.”

Britannia studied the woman and came to a conclusion, “You aren’t going to tell them.”

“No.”

“Why not?” She cleared her throat since this was treading on territory that could just blow up in her face. She avoided discussing it since it was obviously a point of contention between a husband and his wife and the rest of the family. “I mean… it is obvious that this is painful to you and your family. Your beautiful baby doesn’t see her father as often as…”

“I know Tania,” the Malachi replied softly. “Believe me it pains us both and it has me wonder how Sam could still be so understanding.” She looked at Britannia and continued, “You didn’t see how happy and full of rapture his face was when he held her for the first time. The look he gets when he just sits and holds her. And Dean… For the first time in a long time he smiles without the weight of everything.”

Britannia looked at the woman and replied, “But they would want to help in this.”

“They knew when I left the bunker what I was about and I told them about my experiences. They know about Mick and me and how we knew each other.”

“But they would want to know about what happened to him.”

Britannia knew that it was a low blow but she had to make her point with this. She didn’t quite understand it. It was obviously painful with this separation and yet the Malachi was making it work out with Sam and they still hunted together whenever possible. But that was no way to live unless… It then occurred to her.

It was a memory from a long time ago, way back from when she first started pursuing the Malachi. She was given orders to bring her in but if she killed the Malachi it would be no loss. The elders and she were confident in capturing the Malachi since at the time it was just another thing that wasn’t human and yet it was supposed to be the savior of the world. It was a mystery to the elders and they wanted to be partnered with her.

Britannia had the profile and used it, trusted it. But that was what led her to her downfall. And it led her to a few revelations. She looked at the Malachi and narrowed her eyes slightly, “You have already thought out the possibilities haven’t you?”

The sip of wine was hardly a confirmation but it told Britannia enough. This was war and while the Malachi didn’t want to shed blood, she was going to be ready for when that came. It wasn’t a matter of if but when. Britannia remembered that when she was staring at the business end of the blade that gave the Malachi her name.

She could have died that day. She could have been killed and it be made to look like something a human would do. The organization would have figured it out and sent their agents after her but then it would have ended up bloody. Back then, the look the Malachi gave was that she willing to go those lengths in the name of justice. The same look was there but this time it held a whole lot more.

Britannia was right to warn Ketch of what he was getting into when he went into the bunker. The Malachi may no longer live there but the intention was there. She wanted Ketch to know of her touch and she suspected the Malachi knew that Ketch would scoff at it. The organization still thought she was not worth worrying over. They were wrong though. They had no idea that their opponent had been onto them and had started making contingency.

She could have died but the Malachi gave her life. Twice. The second time changed her mind. Plus it helped when she was shown the orphaned children trying to leave the country. She learned of what the organization had done to their parents. It was then that she decided to leave the organization but the Malachi convinced her not to. Instead she became the inside man.

_You are more useful being in the organization than out._

Those words were ominous then and they still had the same feeling now. Britannia looked at the Malachi as she went inside the cabin to pick up and hold her daughter. She felt the same feeling she felt seeing those orphans. She knew that if the Winchesters and the Malachi were killed, the baby would be taken by the organization and raised by them. It would be a cruel irony and their perverted sense of justice in raising the baby of a dhampir to be a hunter but nothing like her parents but a hunter under their heel. She was not going to let that happen. She still wasn’t sure about what the end result of this plan would be, but she would trust the Malachi and continue the role she had taken.

_Be sure. What I am asking means that you will have to keep the biggest secret you will ever keep… your integrity._


	20. 12.18 Light's Memory Still Remaining

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam, Dean and Angie are done with the hunt in Tomahawk, Wisconsin and the goat man and reflect on what they are leaving behind doing the job they do. In the end, it is not just Sam and Dean leaving their mark but Angie too. Tag to The Memory Remains.

“What are you doing?”

“Making our mark.”

Angela sat next to Sam, leaning onto him for warmth as she watched Dean carve his initials into the wooden table. Her lip twitched in a smile as she recalled seeing the same carving in the Impala. She had paid a visit to the junkyard when Dean was rebuilding her after she had been t-boned by the demon driven semi.

It was a thing to think about. What kind of legacy were they leaving with the life they were living? It was curious to see how people would remember if at all. It was a bit moot with her since there were tomes about her before she was born, after she was born and still being told about her. She understood though where Dean was getting at. What were they really leaving behind?

Leaning against her mate, she thought about that as she watched Dean finish carving his initials. Ten years ago she wouldn’t have thought about this question too deeply. She would have questioned whether or not she made a difference mostly after a difficult case. Now she thought about what example she wanted to set for her daughter. What she and Sam both wanted to set for her.

They both wanted a better world for their daughter. She knew Sam wanted Jess to have a life where she didn’t have to be afraid. To have a normal life in the sense of the word that people who didn’t know what they knew… that was near impossible especially since Jess would see her mother’s abilities and if Jess ended up going through the change… They wanted as near normal a life for their daughter as possible and for Angela, a world where she wasn’t afraid or ashamed of what she was.

She still felt shame at being a creature that needed blood if she was seriously injured or sick. That came from her time in hell, being tortured and made to feel ugly for something that was genetics and needed for her to live. She harbored that and it made her choose actions that led in a downward spiral of rage and hatred as well as anger. And yet in spite of all that, Sam chose her and together they created their beautiful daughter.

Angela shifted when Sam leaned forward to carve his initials. She sat back in her chair and studied her boys. Living as long as she had, she had a pretty good memory. She could remember how they looked before the showdown with Azazel. Those were happier times and they had them growing up. Maybe not a whole lot but they were good where they counted. Even the ones they had together were good. They certainly were happier then and occasionally she thought they had been happier not knowing her.

“Angie.”

Angela looked up after feeling a gentle bump on her arm. She saw Sam looking at her with that look that pretty much told all the single woman that there was no one in the world that mattered but her. After everything, he still loved her and trusted her with his life and that of their daughter’s and his brother, her brother. And they reciprocated that fully.

Blinking to focus she saw that Dean was holding his knife out to her. She looked at it and then at him. He gave a slight shake of his hand and said, “Come on. You’re family too.”

Looking at the blade once more, Angela closed her hand on the blade and took the knife. With the ease of practice, she twirled the blade in her hand and pressed the sharpened edge into the wood and started carving. It gave her a warm feeling that she was being included in this. While Dean had claimed her as family before, it was always a pleasure to hear it when it counted.

She carved the ‘A’ for her name, the one she claimed now. She could have used her birth name but she was not that girl any longer. She didn’t deny that they were the same but Angela was the name she had chosen. She looked at the first letter, her lip twitching in a slight smile. She had placed it between Sam and Dean’s initials, just like when they took their picture. She held the knife poised to carve her last name initial.

“It’s ‘W’.”

Angela looked up when she heard Sam’s tone. She saw the serious expression in his face mixed in with the possessiveness he took sometimes. It happened before they married but ever since they mated it took on a different overtone. She felt her mate mark twinge and noticed how there was the slight hint of lust mingled with love and she felt the warmth in her mark. She glanced over at Dean.

“Hey, you married my brother. Makes sense to me.” He smiled as he took a sip of his beer.

Angela returned the smile with one of her own and nodded in agreement. She put the knife to the wood again and began carving the initial in the wood. It made sense since she and Sam did make their marriage legal before she learned she was pregnant with Jess. She carved the ‘W’ and gently brushed the wood shavings away. There stood clearly all three of their initials. She smiled slightly as she rubbed her fingers on it. “It think that looks good.”

“Yeah.”

Angela felt her hand picked up by Sam and leaned back to allow him to hold and caress it. She moved her fingers to touch him because she wanted to. She looked at the two men in her lives that had looked out for her in more ways than one. They were family. Through the good times and the bad they were still together doing what they did best.

She picked up her beer and held it on her lap as she let Sam play with her hand as she looked at Dean. She made a slight face when Dean mentioned about calling Mick. There was one thing she couldn’t tell them and it wasn’t like she had the proof. She took a sip as she heard Ketch answer the phone.

The happy moment was gone as things got to be serious. And yet the moment was ingrained in her memory. It was one more thing to hold onto as she pretended everything was normal when in fact that it wasn’t. She sat back and listened as Sam and Dean talked about their apprehensions reporting to Ketch. She was in agreement with Sam. He was creepy. And it was business as usual.


	21. 12.19 First Light's Future

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are not looking good as Sam tells his daughter Jess a story about what happened with Cas and Kelly. It also gives him a chance to think about what he is going to do. After all he is thinking about his daughter's future. Tag to The Future.

_And the two brothers went to the sandcastle to help their friend and the young maiden. They had a plan that would save the young maiden’s life and that of her child. Another way that didn’t involve dying. They charged ahead on their borrowed ride. It wasn’t Baby and it was slow but it got them to the sandcastle._

_Their friend the white lighter was there on the ground. The evil sorceress had him down on the ground and was going to kill him. The maiden was standing there, afraid as the two brothers came charging forward. The younger one shot at the sorceress to distract her but she only grew angry and threw him to the side._

_The older brother pulled out the Colt but was knocked over and the Colt was seized. The sorceress gave a sly look and with her powers, she melted the Colt. She destroyed the only thing that would have defeated her. Or so she thought. She had forgotten that there was one other thing out there and it arrived like a punch from the blind side._

_The warrior princess had arrived and thrust her enchanted sword under the sorceress’ chin. Her eyes glowed with the anticipation of battle as she said, “And you forget there’s still me.”_

_The sorceress glared at the warrior princess and dared her to try. The warrior princess moved to strike with her sword but the sorceress was too fast. She disappeared and reappeared in the right spot to grab the princess by the arm and fling her sword away. She threw in a punch knowing that the princess would fight back and she got her wish._

_The warrior princess fought bravely until the sorceress hit her hard and she went down. But she wasn’t down for long. She got back up and stood her ground against the sorceress and her friend the white lighter was standing with her. They were not going to let the sorceress hurt the maiden or her unborn baby. The warrior princess had a knife out. It was a special one and could hurt the sorceress._

_The younger brother watched the warrior princess as she was prepared to even die for the young maiden. It hurt him but he was also proud. It was who she was. She was a champion of the people and fought for them. She was going to do the same as well as the white lighter. The younger brother watched as they stood there while the sorceress looked at them and made her move that would more likely end in death._

_It was then that the white lighter grabbed the sorceress’ wrist. The younger brother looked up and saw that his eyes were different. The warrior princess’ eyes were different too. They were glowing as the sorceress started to glow. The younger brother watched as the sorceress burned to ash at the hands of the white lighter and the chant that was on the warrior princess’ lips. The sorceress was defeated and the maiden was safe but the white lighter had different ideas._

_The brothers tried to talk to him and convince him to come with them and the young maiden back to their stronghold. They would come up with another plan. But the white lighter wouldn’t have it. The younger brother was about to say something but all he saw was darkness but he heard voices before the darkness took him. There was one voice that he heard…_

A coo sounded and Sam looked down to see his daughter looking up at him, reaching for his face with her little hand. He grinned as she looked up at him and made her baby sounds. He teased her by wriggling his finger just barely touching her little nose. He murmured, “You like that?”

Sam walked with Jess to where the easy chair was in the bedroom. His lip twitched in memory of sitting in this chair when his wife reapplied his anti-possession tattoo. It was comfortable here in the cabin and one that he needed after what Castiel did. He just had to see his daughter and be with his wife. The whole thing with Kelly Cline and her unborn baby had him anxious with concern for his own family and he could understand Kelly’s side of things. Living proof was in his arms and looking up at him with love.

Feeling wetness, he looked down to see Jess’ little lips closing over the tip. One of her little hands patted his and until her little fingers closed on it. He couldn’t help but smile and he wriggled his finger at her, watching her track his finger and reaching for it. He was under no illusions that she would be normal. That wasn’t in the deck of cards considering that her father had a demon blood addiction, was vessel to the devil and her mother was half human and half vampire and is a reincarnated angel sans grace; there was nothing normal about their family but it didn’t change his feelings for the tiny life he swore to keep safe.

Sam stared at his daughter as she played with his fingers, giggling when she caught one and started chewing on it. It was calming considering that it seemed that Castiel had betrayed them once again. Dean was clinging to the hope that the angel was so desperate for a win that he was willing to do anything. They had all been in that boat before and it always ended up in disaster. And one of them was always working to stave off the worst of the disaster.

The truth was he didn’t know what to think about Lucifer’s baby. It was obviously powerful enough to charge up Castiel to do what he did. It was on par what Angela could do with a demon in terms of extracting and setting it on fire. It was something that needed to be treaded lightly the whole thing with the baby and it did raise questions, some that he didn’t talk about with his wife since they had slightly different ideas about what to do.

Jess made a sound and it distracted Sam. He made a slight smile and adjusted his grip. He could never stay in brooding thoughts for too long when he was in the company of his daughter. She was a little bright light that chased darkness away. She was perfect and it was why he wanted to give her as normal a life as possible and why he understood Angela’s need to keep her safe and in a place she had some measure of control over. It was why he was agreeable to coming to the cabin every few days and would stay.

“Time for her feeding.”

Sam shifted in his seat to see Angela holding a bottle. She correctly guessed that he wanted to feed her and smiled up at her. He accepted the bottle and adjusted his grip when Jess started to squirm. He listened to his wife’s throaty chuckle and said, “Seems like she has your appetite.”

“Don’t you start.”

Sam chuckled at the mocking annoyed look that Angela was giving him. “Just pointing out the truth.”

The result ended up being a hair ruffle and a kiss to his cheek. Sam took it on good humor as he adjusted his position to feed the baby. Jess was never a fussy eater and took the bottle and moved her hands in an attempt to feed herself. She was only going on six months and was already trying to do a lot of things for herself. It gave him a sense of pride.

While Jess was holding onto the bottle and his hand it gave him a chance to look at his wife. He watched as she moved across the room to clean up and check on things. He didn’t miss that she used this as a means of making sure everything was secure. It was force of habit when they were on the road hiding and doing what they did but it was different here. He could see her concern and worry. It was visible like a thick cape. He knew part of it was because of the Brits and she was only going on their past history, which he wasn’t going to get into an argument over. He trusted her judgement. He always had but this…

“I put feelers out for Cas. We’ll see if something pops up. You’ll let Dean know?”

Sam looked at her as she stood there looking at him with a pensive expression on her face. “Yeah,” he replied, “I’ll let him know. He’ll be… glad for that.”

Sam watched her hum her response as she wrapped her arms around herself. He checked to see if Jess finished her bottle. Since she was, he adjusted her to burp her and stood up. He rubbed the baby’s back as he approached Angela. “He’s not mad at you.”

“There’s a lot to be mad at. Hell I’m mad and at Cas.”

“I know.”

There was silence for a moment before Angela murmured something that Sam didn’t quite hear. He looked at her as he continued to rub Jess’ back. It was a means to soothe her to sleep. “What?”

“When light fails and darkness falls, call upon the angel who is ‘beloved’ of all.” Angela frowned a little at that as she looked at Sam and added, “That’s what it told me before Cas stunned me.”

Sam looked at Angela and they shared a look. “You need me to do anything?”

“Usual,” Angela replied with a shake of her shoulders, “Research.” She looked at the baby that was settling in Sam’s arms and smiled. “You spoil her.”

“Hey,” Sam mock pouted.

“Daddy’s little princess.”

Sam couldn’t counter that and let Angela kiss him on the cheek. She left the room murmuring that she was going to get dinner ready. Sam watched her leave and noticed the slightly distracted air she had. The whole thing was on her mind and it was on his too. He got the feeling that she wasn’t telling him everything about what happened at that moment with the Nephilim powering up Castiel. He was certain because he heard something too. He didn’t mention it to Dean since the assumption would have been feedback.

Walking Jess over to her crib, he put her down for her nap. He was reluctant to put her down but he knew that she would be happy to see him again later and want to be held again. He prayed that she would never grow out of it. He touched her head gently as she soothed to sleep, touching the soft wisps of hair that would be dark like her mother’s. His nostrils caught the scent of the jasmine blossoms that Angela tied to the crib. It was something Sherlock had started and they kept it up even though Dean thought it a bit girly. He checked to make sure they wouldn’t fall down and leaned on the edge of the crib and looked down at Jess as she blinked at him blearily.

Stroking her hair, Sam said, “When the younger brother saw darkness, he heard something in his mind clear as day. The voice said to call the one who is beloved by name. The younger brother didn’t know what it meant but he was shown something wonderful. He wasn’t sure about what to make of it but it was on his mind as he rushed home to his own little daughter.

“It was a promise and one that the younger brother wanted more than anything. He just wasn’t sure though. He wasn’t sure about the child of the maiden and what it meant. He trusted the warrior princess though and they always fought together. It was a promise they made and they intended to keep it.”

Sam leaned forward and gave the sleeping Jess a gentle kiss on her head. He smoothed her hair and hummed gently. “They made a promise for their daughter to give her a safe world. It was possible that the child of the maiden meant it but they would have to wait and see.”

Sam finished what he was doing and made sure that Jess was tucked in. He straightened up and sighed. Turning, he quietly walked out of the room, passing Gabriel who came in for his watch. He gave the prepubescent angel a nod and walked out of the room. He paused at the door to give one last look at his sleeping daughter. What Castiel did, he didn’t understand and what he saw and heard… It was something to think about. After all it concerned his daughter’s future.


	22. 12.20 Light's Twins

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angie knows what it's like to be given a choice on the tail of losing someone that means a lot. She knew what Max had done but she is not condemning and in the process making a move to protect him from someone who may not be as understanding. Tag to Twigs and Twins and Tasha Banes.

Max went out to the jeep to get a few things while his sister was settling in. She took it a lot better than he thought. Now that the initial shock was over, everything was slamming full force now. And yet… He sighed as he leaned against the vehicle.

“How long are you going to keep the ruse up?”

Max jumped when he heard the voice and turned to see its owner. He breathed heavily and it felt like he was going to be disciplined. He reacted, “I told you to leave with Sam and Dean.”

“You did but… I didn’t listen. I don’t listen to kids if they are being irrational.”

Max took a breath and tried not to react to being called a kid. Then again she had every right to call him that considering what he knew about her. He could be defensive since he made a choice but that would just only make things… He chose somewhere in the middle and assumed a bland expression and replied, “You better leave Angie. I got this.”

Angela stood there looking at Max. She signaled Gideon to stand down and the dog sat but his hairs were tense. She took a couple of steps forward and replied, “And I’m telling you, no.”

“You better or…”

“Or what? You’ll use your powers?” Angela peered at the boy as she continued to advance. “Go ahead. I’ve gone up against a few witches in my lifetime including your mother.” When Max paused she went in and explained, “Yes, Max. I know your mother. In fact, she mistook me for the thing we were both tracking and hunting.”

Max had started to summon his power but paused the moment he heard Angela admitted to meeting and knowing his mother. “You… you knew Mom?”

Angela nodded at that as she continued to advance. “Tasha was a good woman. She had good instincts and every right to be suspicious of me. Did you know the first move she used on me was the fly and pin method? Same one you were going to use on me?”

Max opened his mouth and shook his head. He still had his power summoned and could do what he wanted but he was hesitant. “You knew my mom,” he repeated.

“I knew a lot of people when I met your mother. Like I said, she tried to kill me first.”

Angela looked at Max. She knew that it was a way in to talk to the boy. She knew what was coming and she wasn’t going to judge on what he did. She could say the same about herself. She just needed him to let her in to talk and then she could do what she could to keep him and the memory of his sister safe.

Max looked at Angela. She wasn’t lying. She never lied to them even when she first met them. It all made sense now, the way how she looked at them. Like she had seen them before but she knew that they weren’t their mother. It also explained the way she seemed to hover and it wasn’t because she was expecting at the time. “Mom tried to kill you?” He sniffed a bit as the tears started to form.

“Emphasis on tried,” Angela replied with a slight smile. She paused when she was within reaching distance of Max. “She thought I was the thing that had been killing people. It was a vamp but not me. The tracking spell she used found me because…” She gestured at herself. “Most things can be found by magic.”

“Explains why you stayed by me and Alicia when we met you.”

Angela looked at Max and gave a gentle smile. “You both look like her and before you introduced yourselves, I knew you were hers.” She adjusted her posture and sighed slightly before continuing, “Tasha taught me a couple of things and…” She tapped her nose while smiling slightly to make her point. “That and she would call me or leave messages with my associates telling me about you two.”

“She told you about us?”

Angela smiled as she explained, “She would go on for hours about when Alicia learned how to use her knife when you mastered the basics in spell craft… She was so proud of you both. And I knew she loved you. That’s why I am here and not on the road.”

“But what about Sam… your daughter?”

“I took a risk and she is waiting for her father at home. Right now… you both are my concern.” Angela crossed her arms over her chest and peered at Max. “I know what you did Max.”

Max tensed a bit. He was ready to use his powers to defend himself but he hesitated. He studied Angela and noted that she was not in a position to look threatening. He did know from the stories that his mom told him and Alicia that she was formidable and she could strike when you least expected it. He relaxed a little and replied, “I don’t…”

Angela held up her hand to get him to stop. “Don’t lie to me, Max. You couldn’t because I could tell right off the bat. I gave you your space and…” She shrugged her shoulders.

“So what are you going to do?”

“Nothing.”

“Nothing?”

“Nothing.”

Max couldn’t understand what Angela was doing. It had him suspicious about her motives since it was obvious she knew what he did. He knew his mom told him that she had a way of doing things that didn’t always made sense but to give her the chance and she would explain. He would take that chance. “Why?”

“I know how you feel.”

“You know what it’s like to lose people you love?”

Angela nodded at Max with a sad smile and replied, “I do. My father was killed before my eyes. I have witnessed Sam and Dean being killed and even though they have been brought back to life, it is still painful to watch.”

“And have you done the unthinkable? Like what I did with Alicia?” Max looked at Angela. He really wanted to see how she would answer that one. Like could she really know what it was like to make that choice; the decision he made regarding Alicia.

Angela looked at Max and knew what he was thinking. There was hardly a thing that surprised her. The whole thing about being one of God’s angels was still high on the list. That was a secret though and one she would take to the grave. Now she had a sad boy in front of her and the best she could do to show that while she didn’t approve, she wasn’t going to condemn him. She looked at him and replied, “I did.”

Max didn’t expect that and looked at Angela. “You… you what?” He stared at Angela with wide eyes.

“I raised her since she was nine,” Angela began, “She was blinded from a fire. I taught her how to use her other senses. Taught her the life but then…” She sighed as she looked down. She gave a dry chuckle and commented, “You’d think after telling Sam and Dean this I’d be able to get it out. Never leaves.” She cleared her throat and continued, “She was mortally wounded and dying. I wasn’t ready to let her go.”

“What did you do?”

“I turned her.”

Max stared at Angela and took a breath. He couldn’t believe it. “You… you turned someone?”

“I wasn’t ready to let her go,” Angela replied as she blinked a watery look. “And to this day I have to live with it. A lot of the choices I have done I still have to live with. At the time it seemed the right thing and years of introspection tell me that I could have done it differently but always circles back to the fact that I would do it again.” She reached out and put a hand on Max’s shoulder. “I don’t agree with your methods but I understand why you did it.”

Max felt the tension come out of his body as Angela touched his shoulder. Listening to her words and the tears started coming out. He didn’t resist when Angela wrapped her arms around him and he started to sob into her shoulder. He could smell roses on her. They were gentle and soothing and that was when he felt a wave of soothing start to come over him.

_When I learned I was pregnant with you both, I was scared but her… She was soothing in of itself. It was like she knew our pain even if it wasn’t the same thing. She took it and made us better if only for a little while and it lingered._

Max realized that what his mom told him and Alicia was happening right now. He could let go but found he didn’t want to. He was comforted by the presence of Angela and he could get how Sam could get so relaxed even in a tense situation. It wasn’t just the love that they had for each other… it was her.

“I know how you feel Max. That’s why I’m here. I miss your mother too.”

Max felt the pats on his back as he gave a final sob. Composing himself he stepped back but never far from her reach. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”

Max stood there, not sure of whether or not to send her away. He doubted she would leave if he asked. She would stay if she deemed it to be important. “I uh… I had to. I…”

“You don’t have to explain,” Angela replied holding up her hand to stop Max. “During the centuries, there have been people that were all I had in the world. Now… Sam, Dean, my baby… They mean more than anything to me. But it doesn’t mean that I love you or your sister any less.”

“Love us?”

Angela nodded at that. “Believe it or not your mom and I… we grew close. And then when she told me about you two… I couldn’t help but love her and you both and I spent checking up and making sure that you were relatively safe.” She looked at Max and grinned, “You aren’t the first I’ve taken a liking to and watched from afar.”

“Put like that sounds creepy.”

“A price to pay when you know that there are darker things out there that would use what matters the most against you,” Angela replied with a shrug. “I’ve had to watch my godson grow up without getting to know me until he was an adult. It was the same with Sam and Dean when they were little. It’s who I am but don’t think it is because I am just trying to keep you out of trouble.”

“Oh you mean this is not you coming to tell me that I made a mistake and to be careful about the magic I used?”

“It is a little of that but more because I do care about you,” Angela replied. “I was in that same position when my father died and the thing is… he made a deal. His life for mine. He gave his life so that I may live. I was so alone. My mother had died fifty years earlier and… I was mad at the world and I nearly turned into something that would have given your mother justification to kill me. I care about you and Alicia, Max. I know what’s in that room isn’t exactly her but her heart is there along with her memories and… a part of me thinks of it as her.”

Max looked at the woman as she admitted probably more than she would have. Even when they first met she had this aloofness that told there was history and even though she told them things, it was like they didn’t know everything. Except for maybe Sam but it was different. She was genuine in her emotions though. She still got watery eyed over things that were years ago. And here she was not condemning him but sharing his grief over his mother and Alicia. “You do care about us,” he said rather than asked.

Angela nodded, “I do. And I am here for you… which is why my visit has another purpose.” She swallowed slightly as she took a breath and straightened up.

Max looked at Angela. She looked regretful that she had to do this. But he saw how much she cared. It was not faked. He saw how she felt about his dad and the history with that demon. He glanced over at the room where Alicia was waiting and then looked back at Angela, “What is it?”

Angela looked at Max. As it went, she had no idea what the Brits had and she had minimized her contact with Britannia for security reasons but she wasn’t going to take chances. If she could warn the other hunters out there and the academy… She would do what it took and she prayed that Mary was playing it smart with them. Taking a breath she put a hand on Max’s shoulder and looked him in the eye.


	23. 12.21 Something About the Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angela knows that the gloves have come off with Eileen's death at the hands of the BMOL. It is war and she makes a promise to Ketch, a promise of death. But there is also something else and it involves her and Mary Winchester. Tag to There's Something about Mary.

“Don’t be foolish.”

Angela stared at Ketch as he pointed his gun in the direction of her, Sam and Dean. She also noted the other Brits that were advancing. Her eyes narrowed as she watched their movements and moved her head to adjust her hearing and her nostrils flared slightly. Her muscles were tensed to spring as she gave subtle promptings to Sam and Dean that were wordless.

Her eye was on Ketch when Sam made the move to grab Lady Toni as her hands flew out. After seven years, it was second nature for her telekinetic ability and she knew exactly where everything was. The things that Britannia made sure they didn’t find. And those came in the form of two MP5s fully loaded and she swung them in Ketch’s direction and pulled the trigger.

Angela had been in enough fire fights over the decades to leave a good impression. Her friend Mac certainly knew that when they were in the Altay Mountains and definitely the Winchesters knew. Skill and practice with various weapons over the ages compiled with her enhanced senses made her the killing machine that the Brits wanted and she showed no mercy pointing her weapons at the Brits.

It had been easy to take out the lackeys. Sam had the Toni bitch as leverage and she and Dean were hunting. Most times she would have avoided hunting people but these assholes had pissed her off to the point where all bets were off. She was less inclined to give mercy and head for straight revenge. And it all started when she learned about Eileen.

Jodi called her about Eileen. It had Angela puzzled and confused. The last she had heard of Eileen was that she was heading back to Ireland. She had called Mac to let him know to set up surveillance and protection. She knew that the Brits were not going to let it lie with the whole thing with Renny and she wasn’t going to let Britannia compromise her position. It was why she had briefed Mac and he said he was on it. It seemed that Eileen had other ideas.

She had gone with Sam and Dean after securing the sanctuary and gave her security code word to Gabriel. He would know what to do to protect Jess if they discovered the sanctuary. She had been in coroner’s offices before but this time… She couldn’t hold back the tears and the shortness of breath that came; she was like a parent losing a child and her legs almost collapsed under her. She wasn’t even aware of Sam holding her up with a hand.

Eileen was like her own child. She helped in raising her like she did with Augusta. She had taught her everything with regards to hunting and learning how to use her senses. It pained her when she let the girl believe that she had died on a hunt but only as a means to protect her. Like that worked since they met up and they talked and reestablished lines of communication. It was like old times and Angela’s protective instincts kicked in especially after Renny. To see Eileen now, and recognizing the damage…

Revenge had been the thing when she had first died. It was raw anger and hatred. It was hatred of the demons that killed her, hatred of the life and hatred of herself. The last was what became dominant at the hands of Azazel, Alistair and Lenya and it damaged her psyche to the point that she thought she wasn’t worthy of anyone’s love and attention even when she dared to care to those that reached out. And it didn’t help that the people that meant the most to her ended up dying.

She was tired. Plain and simple. She was tired of trying to live as near a normal life as she could and help people and then having it taken away from her. The last straws were those that held a special place in her heart. She tempered it with that Toni bitch since she was about to be a mother then but she made it clear when Eileen accidentally shot Renny. Now a line was crossed and she wasn’t inclined to take prisoners.

She was prepared for war when she heard Mick being killed. Mac had been put on the alert and she put out the word to connections she didn’t tell the Winchesters but they knew her as having them and were good with that. Yet no one was really prepared for when war visited your backyard. It was like that during the Revolution and she saw the faces of the children… As she looked at Eileen, she made a promise and could only sign it to her.

_I know who did this as well as you. I promise that they will pay. This is war, and they will pay. I promise. I love you… sweet pea._

Angela had no remorse killing the Brits that invade the bunker. She looked at Dean with the same look she had given the times when she had to be that tactician that was spoken of in legend. That was what was needed and the hunter that had scared even the Brits to the point where they thought they had to kill her. She was that hunter and they would pay especially if she was to make a world safe for her daughter.

The only one that was left was Ketch and Sam had the Toni bitch as leverage. And that was when she smelled it. She smelled Mary but there was something different. It was confirmed when it became clear that she was threatening Sam and Dean with a bullet if they didn’t let Toni go. Angela didn’t relinquish her MP5s so easily and held one at Ketch and the other at Mary and her eyes were narrowed.

“Angie. What are you doing?”

Angela heard Dean but didn’t acknowledge him. She stared mostly at Mary with her gun pointed at her. The other was at Ketch. It was a nasty version of the Mexican standoff. Either way someone could get killed in this scenario.

“I suggest you lower your weapons, Malachi. Not unless you want their blood on your hands,” Ketch was saying, “Not unless you want to leave that wee baby all alone.”

Angela knew the stakes. She was the great tactician. She was known for it and she had led armies in various major wars in history and numerous smaller ones that never made the history books and one of them was in a time that she wasn’t even born in. It all came down to risks and stakes, an economist’s dream and she debated it as she looked at Mary.

It was like an eternity until she lowered her weapons and dropped them. She didn’t have a look of defeat though. She merely stared at Ketch and then glanced at Mary and commented, “So… you turned into the bitch, Mary. Pity.”

Angela ignored the look that Dean shot her as she trailed Ketch. It was sweet irony that Toni was going to be stuck in the bunker with them. She didn’t pay any attention to her since her gaze was on Ketch and Mary leaving the bunker. She looked and watched them and noted that Ketch seemed very uncomfortable with the look she was giving. That was just fine and dandy with her.

“It’s almost poetic you all being locked here.”

Angela let Ketch ramble until they were about to leave. She then called out, “Savor this while you can, Ketch.”

It was enough to call him back and he smirked at her, “Oh I intend to. And don’t worry. We’ll find her and she will be everything she should be.”

Angela knew that it was a ruse to get her emotional. That was Ketch’s mistake. Her lip twitched as she replied, “You’re victory will be sort lived.”

“Oh? And why is that?”

Angela had said things before that had the Winchesters look at her like she was a different person. It was only an extension of her whole person. Sam was starting to understand it and it allowed him to be the voice of reason with things like her taking Jess out of the bunker and moving her off the grid. And things she said always had a purpose. What came next was the truth, “Because I will kill you… the both of you.”

You could literally drop a pin when she said that she would kill both Ketch and Mary. It was going to produce questions from both Sam and Dean. That would be dealt with once they were out of there. She continued to stare at Ketch and continued, “I’ve got you babe.”

She continued to stare up at the balcony as Dean ran up to try and keep the door from closing. She probably could have made it up there but it wasn’t worth the risk since Ketch and Mary had the guns. And more likely they were the kind that would guarantee her death. She only looked down once the door closed and the locks clicked in place. She looked at Sam as the lights powered down leaving them in darkness.

_Angela sat there in the diner as she checked to make sure that Mary was under the spell. She put away the crystal and looked at her in the eye as she gently gripped her hands. With a controlled voice and the hint of suggestion, she spoke, “No matter what happens, even with death, know that I’ve got you and everything will be clear.”_

This was war. And Ketch and the British Men of Letters picked the wrong general to cross. There would be no mercy.


	24. 12.22 What the Light Is

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam led the charge against the BMOL and got a helping hand from an old friend named Mac and some new people that offer a lifeline if needed. Different background but doing what is right and Sam sees more of how the woman he loves made a difference and what she is to all people. Tag to What We Are.

“Well that was fun.”

Sam glanced over at Mac who was holding an assault rifle and completely decked out like he was a SWAT officer. Made sense though since the man was military, still military and with the SAS of all things. That still was one for the books; the fact that there was a hunter that was living a near normal life as possible while still hunting. All things possible.

“You’re just happy because you got to blow something up.”

Sam glanced over at the woman that had spoken. Even though she was dressed in a casual suit, she looked like she was too delicate to be handling the gun that looked ridiculously huge in her hands. He raised his brow mostly because of the banter he had been hearing between the two of them. It made him want to laugh because it sounded like what he and Angela would do in a fight.

Nicolette Walker was a surprise along with the small entourage of hunters/federal agents that came to help. It was one more surprise that his wife had up her sleeve and from the beginning when he made the choice to work with the Men of Letters. And surprisingly there was no flaunting of superiority since the agents were dressed like they would for their day jobs but she said, “We may come from different walks of life but we all want the same thing.”

Sam liked the woman. Dean was pleased too but mostly at the fact that they actually had backup and resources. After all these years… As Nicolette said, they were doing their jobs of keeping an eye on the hunters and making sure the law didn’t catch up to them. It wasn’t a perfect system but it helped out other hunters and saved a lot from being attacked and killed.

“Can always count on Americans to blow shit up as the expression goes.”

Then there was Lady Britannia. Both Sam and Dean made a move to kill her but Angela held them back and with her powers. It surprised Sam since she never used it in that capacity with them. Yeah when he and she were alone… This was different the moment she put herself between the woman and the other hunters with her hand raised in warning.

There was a lot of anger since there was the fact that Angela refused to work with the Men of Letters and had left the bunker with their daughter. A fact that Sam was now grateful for considering that she had given Gabriel, the adolescent archangel and Amitiel, one of two responsible for his daughter being there today carte blanche to take Jess and go to a place of safety of their choosing and not to tell Angela or him. It was extreme but Sam knew beyond shadow of a doubt that Angela had not taken the Brits lightly and would do anything and everything to keep Jess safe. An agreement he wholeheartedly supported.

It was also a testimony to his wife’s ability to inspire loyalty in people that would be enemies. Britannia admitted to him personally that in the beginning she had been the one to track and hunt Angela after Mick Davies failed to do so. Three times and three beatings later with the last a serious reminder that her life was in Angela’s hands had her turn into spy. She admitted that it was fun spying on the very people that believed ends justified the means no matter what.

“Well glad the old hag is dead,” Britannia was saying. “But there are still the others back home.”

That caught Sam’s attention and he looked at her as she was laying the last of the charges. He asked, “Are you compromised?”

Britannia smirked at him and replied, “No. I’m a profiler and forensic psychologist. My primary job was to analyze you and your brother along with an old friend and give them something. You’d be surprised how easy it was to hide secrets within that bunker that even they don’t know about. Some in the works.”

Sam blinked at that and gave a slight sigh, “Angie.”

“Maybe she should have used it to get you out but I think she was still not trusting of that Toni bitch.” Britannia shrugged a bit at that. “I don’t.”

Sam nodded at that and looked at the handiwork that he and the other hunters laid out. He turned in time to see Mac walking towards him with a detonator and holding it like it was a toy. “You mind?”

Mac looked at the detonator and grinned, “Relax, Susie.” He chuckled at Sam’s eye roll. “This thing is fine. Won’t go off until I arm it for ya.” He held it out for Sam to take a look.

Sam gave a slight annoyed look at Mac. He had met Mac a few years ago as a result of a promise and thought the Scotsman to be crazy as well as too territorial for his own good. He couldn’t deny though that he was a good shot since he proved it by saving his and Dean’s ass from a monster that almost had the drop on them. In the end, he was just another guy that was loyal to Angela and a good friend. There was nothing to be jealous of and Mac was more like a protective older brother claiming to make sure Sam was worthy of her. Taking a look at the detonator Sam blinked. He had seen that set up before. He could even recall her exact words.

Mac saw the look and grinned, “Who do ya think taught her, Sam?”

Sam shook his head and gave a slight chuckle just as Nicolette came in to report that she has a few cleaners on standby if needed. Others came in reporting that the charges were set. He gave the nod and Mac turned and gave the order to clear out. It made it clear that he was a soldier and used to giving orders. He was stopped when Mac handed him the detonator saying, “Hey, you led us. Why not?”

They were down a few hunters but in the end, they fought back and took down the Brits. Sam was glad it was over. That meant that he could be with his daughter again. And if Dean and Angela were successful, they could start over with Mary. It was a light at the end of the tunnel.

“I can tell you’re wanting to get back to your wee bairn,” Mac was saying as he drove.

Sam glanced over at Mac. Normally he wouldn’t let anyone else drive the Impala but Mac insisted and Nicolette said that it was safer. He had no complaints since the man could drive. He couldn’t hide it and replied, “More than anything.”

“It’s different when you’re a parent,” Mac agreed, “The worry is there but different. Worry that they will grow up okay, that they are safe. Greatest feeling in the world though.”

“You got that right,” Sam agreed.

“And he agrees with me.”

“Don’t know if that’s a good thing,” Nicolette piped up from the back where she was tucked in with Sam’s dog Kieko. “But I will say this, I intend to make it clear that the Brits will be under scrutiny if they come here and we won’t be nice if they break rules.”

Sam glanced backwards at the woman. He knew she was serious though her flippant manner at times was like Angela’s especially when she revealed that she was CIA. It made the whole situation sound improbable until she showed him her badge along with an ID that had an occult sigil on it. Mac was chuckling, “No doubt, Nico. Give those shit arses hell like we do in Glasgow.”

“Only because your lot managed to keep the Men of Letters out for over a hundred or so years,” Nicolette retorted playfully. She looked at Sam and added, “Only since the time of William Wallace but he claims it is longer than that. But what do I know. I chase leads where none exists.” She smirked at Mac’s head.

“Aye and look where that got us. You fell in. I had to babysit your arse and then the cavalry dropped in at Altay. Saved our lives.”

“Indeed.”

Sam looked at the pair. It was obvious they had been through a lot and it wasn’t all that different from him and Angela. “You’re talking about Angie.”

“Aye,” Mac replied.

“We were in the middle of a normal op. You know stop the next Russian terrorist from starting World War III,” Nicolette explained, “I did my job and Mac did his. We ended up on a bridge that should have been the end of us. But nope.”

“If you think the lass handling an MP5 was something. It was something else when she literally tore into the group and killed them before they got off two shots,” Mac added. “Of course one of them was a demon but… you get the picture.”

“Yeah, I do.” Sam meant it with a nod. “Thanks.”

“For what?”

“This.”

“It’s nothing,” Mac countered, “Just doing our jobs.” He paused and looked at Sam and added, “And I would have offered her and the bairn a place to stay on MacTavish land. The buggers know better than to go there.”

“You really care about her.” Sam wasn’t offended at the options that were available.

“Aye. Good friend. Taught me a thing or two that’s been handy with the SAS. But mostly because she’s a friend. The only one who really sees the world for what it can be and fights for it.”

Sam couldn’t deny that. Angela was always one to have hope even in the most dire of situations. There could be no visible way out and she would say that there was still a chance. It was infectious and touched a lot of people. She really believed that there could be a better world than the one she came into and worked for it. It was why he couldn’t and wasn’t angry at her decision to go into hiding with their daughter. He agreed, “It’s part of what she is. Faith, hope and love.”

Mac nodded in agreement as he drove back to the bunker. He handed over the keys without complaint and said, “Well that’s that. Time to get back to my side of the pond.”

“You’re on leave,” Nicolette pointed out.

“I know that,” Mac scowled slightly. “I remember.”

Sam chuckled, not taking it any longer. “Alright, I get it. You two should get going.”

“Damn straight,” Nicolette replied. She smiled as she pulled out a card with a number. She held it out to Sam. “Pass along the word. And if you need help with your angel situation…”

“Should I ask?”

“Part of our mandate.” Nicolette grinned at Sam and added, “You know, history has a funny way of making things happen. We’re young but… plenty of people who know a thing or two.”

Sam nodded and said his final goodbye after teasing them about getting along like a good married couple. They didn’t even flinch but Nicolette smiled and said that he and his brother could call her Nico. It gave him a bit of a high note as he walked into the bunker. He found his wife and brother talking to his mom.

“And as I’ve told the boys… where there is one finger there are three pointing at you. We’ve all done things Mary. Things we aren’t proud of but as Dean said… they make us what we are. And sometimes push us in a direction where we resist until broken down.”

“And I’m glad you did what I asked and… killed me.”

“Had to in order to reach the locked room. I’ve got you always.”

Sam paused and thought about it. He remembered how Angela threatened to kill both Ketch and his mother. At the time he thought it was literal. Listening now… he realized that Angela had repeated that several times. It was something he would have to ask but right now he was glad that whatever it was worked. He thought about that as he hugged his mother who had been nervous about his forgiveness, his brother who had his back and the wife who loved with all her heart. He had been asked what it would have been like if he had never met Angela. He knew that it wouldn’t be like it was right now and that was why he never questioned it. She was who she was and it was different to many people.


	25. 12.23 The Light's Watchtower

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer's son is being born. Cas is gone along with Mary and something has happened. Sam goes to find out what happened to Angela and finds something that could be a beginning or end. Tag to All Around the Watchtower.

She had been reluctant to use the way that Crowley said she should use. Sam didn’t blame her. It was not a question of whether or not she could. She could and had demonstrated her abilities but… Sam knew there were lines she would never cross unless asked. Like using grace, touching it and following it.

_To touch an angel’s grace is intimate. I was… Gabe touched me with his grace to save me. That…_

Sam was quick to reassure her that she didn’t have to do that. Instead she researched and focused on trying to find Castiel through the bond they shared as guardian and charge. He knew she had been trying ever since he took off and each time she was saddened. Sam knew that the angel turned it off and refused to answer. Luckily they found him and Kelly and it was right when she went into labor.

It was automatic for Angela to take charge. She marched up the stairs with her bag in hand and it took her saying Mary’s name to follow. Sam wasn’t going to interfere on that note since his mom and wife both had been in labor. Plus he knew better not to interfere with a healer who took no nonsense from anyone. Even Castiel let her pass and that was saying something.

Sam knew that they were in a bind but one thing that they could all agree on was to prevent Lucifer from getting the kid. So they had to come up with a plan. It really was no rest for the weary. They had just finished getting rid of the Brits and now they had to deal with Lucifer. That was the life.

They had come up with a plan after Castiel showed him and Dean an alternate universe that showed what it would be like if he and Dean hadn’t been born and didn’t save the world. It was also a world where Angela didn’t exist as well. Actually, according to the Apocalypse version of Bobby, she had fought bravely and died protecting people.

Sam wasn’t surprised on that note. Even when she went through her darkest moments, she always thought of others first. Even with her badass reputation as a demon slayer, one who tortured demons, she had a streak of compassion that could never really be suppressed. And the reason why she was for not killing Kelly or the Nephilim about to be born.

Sam was used to feeling different emotions and fear being one of them. Standing there as Lucifer approached… It was like getting doused with a cold bucket of water but right on his nerves. He had one too many memories that involved Lucifer in his current vessel. But he had to stay firm and stick to the plan that they had come up with and it involved the tear in the fabric of time and space and a spell with Crowley’s help.

The plan didn’t go off without a hitch. There was always a hiccup in their plans. It was why Angela always had a backup plan and a backup for the backup most of the time. Other times the contingency was done on the fly. Like what his mother did with the Enochian warded brass knuckles. It was something that Lucifer didn’t expect but it was also something they didn’t expect either. Mary, his mother was pulled into the other universe and Castiel…

They had been so used to having the angel there even with all his screw ups that it was hard to contemplate that he was gone. But he knew that the angel was dead. He had seen it and… A loud screech filled the air. It caused everyone to pause and look around. Sam didn’t though. He knew what caused it and felt it before the screech came but there was something else coupled to it. He didn’t have time to think though because his mother went against Lucifer and she went through the rift.

There was no time to think about it since the ground rumbled underneath his and Dean’s feet. The lights were also flickering in the house and it had Sam running. He was torn between staying with his brother and checking on Angela and Kelly. He chose the latter knowing that Dean needed a moment and he really didn’t know what happened to his wife and he had to assuage his personal fears that had never gone away.

Sam didn’t know what to expect when he entered the room. Well he expected that Kelly would be dead. It was in the lore that the mother never survived. It just went to show that no matter how much you expected something, it always had a way of affecting you. It was never easy to see someone who didn’t deserve it die. It had him wonder how Angela was able to do it after all these centuries. The fighting, death, destruction and life.

Something caught his attention and he turned to take a look. It was coming from a room off to the side. He stepped out into the hall and saw the outline of foot prints. He held back the swallow as he followed the foot prints. He hadn’t seen Angela in the room and it had him wondering what she was doing and if she was okay. He knew that it had to be painful with what happened to Castiel and then being here… He tentatively reached out to try and find her but there was nothing. More like a muted sound and it felt weird and worried him.

The foot prints glowed on the ground and were like a clear line to what he wasn’t sure of what to expect. He held his fear in check as he followed and approached the room. The muted feeling also grew stronger. That had to be her right? Angela was in the same room. But why was her presence muted?

The room was obviously intended to be a nursery. Sam got the feeling that Kelly wanted to experience as much as she could of being a mother. It had him realize how lucky he was his own daughter’s mother was alive to see her grow and be there through all the milestones of being a human. Now it was dark and had an almost ghostly quality to it. And that was when he saw it… saw him.

The boy, was sitting in a corner. His arms were over his knees and his chin was resting on them. He wasn’t alone though. There was one other person in the room. Sam shifted to take a look even though he knew who it was in the room. He felt his breath hitch and swallowed.

It was definitely Angela. There was no mistaken her figure in the shadows. She had a certain way that came through even in darkness. The moonlight filtering through the window also highlighted her figure giving a sort of ethereal glow. It brought back the memory of the time he caught her looking at the moon when she was a little girl. There was something about how the moon brought out her features and that was before finding out all the crazy stuff about her being an ex-angel. This time though she was looking not at the moon but down at the boy.

Sam couldn’t see her expression since it was encased in shadow. He couldn’t tell if she was giving the look or what. He took a step forward and the boy looked at him. The eyes were glowing and the smile that formed was rather creepy. What bothered him was that Angela was not reacting like she normally would. Something was up and he wasn’t sure if he would like it. He ventured, “Angie?”

Sam was relieved that she heard him since she straightened up slightly. He involuntarily made a sound when her head shifted to look at him. The reason was that the moment she looked at him, her eyes glowed and it wasn’t like the warm glow that would appear when she vamped out. It was more like when she was on the hunt and it meant to kill, her warrior look. It had him swallow slightly when she looked at him with that glow. It was then that he noticed them.

The smoky outline of wings were protruding from her back. He had seen them before but it was always treated like a fluke. This time though… It had him wonder as he stared back at her and her glowing eyes. Sam didn’t realize that as he looked at her, his pupils reflected a similar glow even though he was getting an ominous feeling from it. Something was happening and he didn’t know what.


End file.
